Toxic Shame - The Soul Eater
Carl Jung described shame as 'the soul eating emotion'. In this video Darren Magee discusses when feelings like embarrassment, guilt and shame become toxic and can lead to avoidance behaviours as well as social anxiety, self loathing, low self esteem and confidence and fear of criticism and rejection.
Looking also at where it comes from and ways to help address it.
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
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#toxicshame #shame #darrenmagee
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Complex PTSD
Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD) is a type of mental health condition that can happen after someone experiences long term traumatic situations and events. In this video Darren Magee outlines the differences between CPTSD and PTSD, looks at some of the common causes and symptoms (such as dissociation, negative self view, difficulties trusting others) as well as different approaches to treatment such as EMDR.
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
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#çomplextrauma #CPTSD #DarrenMagee
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What Motivates Narcissists?
Common characteristics of narcissism include grandiose behaviour, a sense of entitlement, being disagreeable, a lack of empathy, being emotionally abusive, highly resistant or sensitive to criticism and being manipulative. In this video Darren Magee outlines the motivation behind some of the typical behaviours and beliefs of narcissistic people.
Please use the comment section to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#narcissism #narcissist #DarrenMagee
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Post Traumatic Growth
Post Traumatic Growth is a theory developed by psychologists Richard Tedeschi and Lawrence Calhoun in the mid 1990’s that explains a transformation of positive growth experienced by people who have endured psychological struggles with adversity.
In this video Darren Magee outlines the theory and looks at some the areas in which people can grow as a result of their trauma, as well some ideas that might help with that growth.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#posttraumaticgrowth #trauma
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Triangulation
Triangulation is a form of psychological manipulation aimed at, among other things, dividing and conquering others. It is an unhealthy maladaptive strategy that tends to generate even more negativity in relationships. In this video Darren Magee outlines the nature of triangulation, some of the reasons behind why people triangulate and the affects it has not only on the person being targeted, the third party brought into the conflict, but also on the manipulator themselves.
Other videos in this series about coercion:
Emotional Abuse https://youtu.be/9KiReTScQxM
Ostracism https://youtu.be/B9BAXkwVNj0
Financial Abuse https://youtu.be/IajHlGw_jTo
Psychological Abuse https://youtu.be/uSg-jT0bn4o
Gaslighting What is Gaslighting? https://youtu.be/-jtuYJLfAHw
Please use the comment box to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#triangulation #psychologicalmanipulation #narcissism
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Othello Syndrome (Delusional Jealousy)
Othello Syndrome (Sometimes known as morbid jealousy, sexual jealousy, delusional jealousy or erotic jealousy syndrome), was first coined by psychiatrist John Todd. Named after Shakepeare's play, 'Othello', it refers to someone who is consumed by obsessive, intrusive, and at times delusional thoughts about their partner's fidelity.
In this video Darren Magee outlines what it is and some of the common characteristics and triggers.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#othellosyndrome #delusionaljealousy #morbidjealousy
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Spineless Sadism - The Cowardly Bully?
Spineless Sadism is a subtype of Sadistic Personality. Typical characteristics of sadism include getting pleasure from other people's suffering or asserting dominance through inflicting pain and humiliation and acts of aggression and violence.
The common traits of Spineless Sadism include being part of a larger group that bullies and abuses, gaining gratification from watching others in pain and distress and lying about their ability to inflict pain and misery.
Sadistic personality quite often co occurs with, among other things, narcissistic personality and psychopathy, and is one of four components of the Dark Tetrad.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#sadisticpersonality #sadism #darrenfmagee
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The Stages of Trauma Bonding
Trauma bonding is an emotional but dysfunctional attachment that occurs in the presence of danger, shame or exploitation. It is a form of psychological and emotional abuse that normally occurs in coercive relationships through a pattern of both positive and negative reinforcement.
In this video Darren Magee discusses the seven stages of trauma bonding, how it can happen quite insidiously.
Further information for support can be found below:
https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help
https://belfastwomensaid.org.uk/
https://mensallianceni.co.uk/
Other videos on this topic you might find interesting:
Breaking Free from Trauma Bonds
https://youtu.be/dPg3qUiBteU
Six Signs of being Trauma Bonded
https://youtu.be/cDCV9jYvfqs
Please feel free use the comment box to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos.
If you find this video interesting or helpful please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#traumabond #traumabonding #darrenmagee
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Six Signs of being Trauma Bonded
Trauma bonding is a term first used by Patrick Carnes to describe an emotional but dysfunctional attachment that occurs in the presence of danger, shame or exploitation. It is a form of psychological and emotional abuse that normally occurs in toxic, coercive relationships through a pattern of both positive and negative reinforcement.
Previously thought of as Stockholm Syndrome, in this video Darren Magee outlines the concept of trauma bonding and looks at six common signs of being in a trauma bonded relationship.
Other videos on this topic you might find interesting:
The Stages of Trauma Bonding
https://youtu.be/W2KyP8mmae0
Breaking Free from Trauma Bonding
https://youtu.be/dPg3qUiBteU
Please feel free use the comment box to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos.
If you find this video interesting or helpful please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#traumabond #traumabonding
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The Strengths and Struggles of a Highly Sensitive Person
Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) is a term first coined in the 1990's by Psychologist Elaine Aron to describe people who experience increased sensitivity to social, emotional and physical stimuli.
Some of the common characteristics include being highly empathetic, compassionate, and feeling things more deeply than others. Sometimes negatively described by others as being 'too sensitive', in this video Darren Magee discusses some of the strengths and struggles of of being a highly sensitive person, from excessive rumination to creativity and resourcefulness.
If you find this video interesting or helpful please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#highlysensitive #HSP #darrenmagee
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Seven Signs of a Healthy Relationship
Darren Magee discusses seven signs of a good, healthy relationship
1 - Boundaries are respected
2 - Agreeing to disagree and resolving conflict and differences constructively
3 - We don't lose our sense of self, our identity, our self respect in the relationship
4 - Encouragement, not discouragement and constant criticism
5 - Managing expectations on self and other person
6 - Are your needs being met? Is the other persons?
7 - Safety, the relationship is a safe and nurturing place for both people, not fearing reactions and behaviours from the other person.
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
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#healthyrelationship #relationships #wellbeing
5
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Seven Signs of an Unhealthy Relationship
Ever asked yourself 'is my relationship toxic?' Darren Magee outlines seven signs of an unhealthy, toxic relationship. Looking at the behaviours present warning it could be an unhealthy place to be. Unhealthy relationships can be with a partner, family member, friend or work colleagues.
Some of the unhealthy behaviours are:
1. Rules, conditions
2. Guilt and Shame
3. Constantly checking up - constantly having to explain - lack of privacy
4. Isolating
5. Double standards
6. Sabotage
7. Control
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#toxicrelationship #unhealthyrelationship
2
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Agents of the Narcissist How they Recruit Flying Monkeys
In this video Darren Magee discusses agents of the narcissists, how they recruit Flying Monkeys. The different tactics used to recruit and train different types of people to perpetuate the narcissistic abuse on their behalf through gaslighting, smear campaign and stalking roles.
Contacting family members, friends, work colleagues to undermine and erode victims support network
1 - The Willing - They manipulate and use the energy and excitement some toxic peopl eget out of perpetuating the abuse.
2 - The Naive - they lie and gaslight to discredit the witness/victim
3 - The Unwilling - use bullying tactics or play on guilt and shame to manipulate this agent.
'Better to be on the wrong side than on the wrong end of the abuse'
4 - Are you a Flying Monkey?
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#narcissisticabuse #flyingmonkeys #narcissism
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How do I tell someone I think they're being abused?
Voicing any concerns you may have around a friend or family members relationship can be a difficult subject to approach. You may notice changes in their mental health or becoming more withdrawn, but fear pushing them away or making things worse. In this video Darren Magee discusses different approaches to consider before raising your concerns.
This video is for information purposes only.
Further information can be found below:
https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help
https://www.womensaid.org.uk/the-survivors-handbook/im-worried-about-someone-else/
Mens Alliance NI
#domesticabuse
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Eight Characteristics of a Narcissistic Family
In this video Darren Magee discusses eight typical characteristics of a dysfunctional narcissistic family. Looking at behaviours, beliefs and characteristics that make living in a narcissistic, dysfunctional family look like a cult. The different roles the children are put into and the narcissistic abuse.
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#narcissisticfamily #narcissism #narcissisticabuse
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The Narcissistic Sociopath (Malignant Narcissism)
Sociopath is a term that would come under Anti Social Personality. The narcissistic sociopath, sometimes referred to as a narcopath, or more commonly a malignant narcissist, is when sociopathy and narcissistic personality are co-morbid.
In this video Darren Magee outlines the common characteristics and traits of a malignant narcissist including a disregard for rules and social norms, lack of morality, narcissistic rage and impulsivity.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder https://youtu.be/0qhi-EdKhtU
Anti-Social Personality Disorder https://youtu.be/CIhHQTEftVk
Characteristics of a Sociopath https://youtu.be/4M82PGQXjV8
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#malignantnarcissist #narcissisticsociopath #darrenmagee
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Ostracism - Being abused without a word being said
To be ostracised, excluded by others can be one of the most insidious forms of emotional abuse in the sense that the aggressors don't have to actually do anything except ignore their target. It can happen at work, in communities, friendship groups and even families.
In this video I outline what it is, the affects on someone's mental health and refer to research carried out by Professor Kipling D Williams.
For further information: https://www.purdue.edu/newsroom/research/2011/110510WilliamsOstracism.html#:~:text=This%20is%20when%20people%20who,helplessness%20and%20feelings%20of%20unworthiness.%22
Please use the comment section to suggest any topics you might like me to cover in future videos.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#ostracism #emotionalabuse #darrenmagee
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Sadistic Personality Subtypes: Enforcing Sadism
There are four subtypes of Sadistic Personality, Enforcing Sadism being one of them. Typical characteristics of sadism include getting pleasure from other people's suffering, controlling through inflicting pain and humiliation and acts of aggression and violence.
One of the traits of Enforcing Sadism includes believing someone has the right to punish and hurt others through a position of authority or moral virtue.
Sadistic personality quite often co occurs with, among other things, narcissistic personality and psychopathy.
If you find this video helpful or interesting please consider supporting me on Patreon.
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#sadisticpersonality #sadism #darrenfmagee
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What is Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome?
In this video Darren Magee discusses the term 'Narcissistic Abuse Syndrome' and outlines six symptoms that may be present to identify it. This video focuses solely on a relationship where one person has strong narcissistic personality traits, the other doesn't and has ended the relationship. These symptoms can appear during the relationship, but this video focuses on then unspoken reality of narcissistic abuse, life after narcissistic abuse and recovery being a journey.
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#NarcissisticAbuseSyndrome #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder #MentalHealth
5
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Recognising Financial Abuse
Financial abuse would come under the umbrella term of economic abuse, a form of coercive control that involves the control and misuse of money and resources that limits someones choices and restricts their freedom. In this video Darren Magee outlines financial abuse and discusses some of the signs. Also looking at some of the ways in which financial abuse can continue following the end of a relationship.
If you need support for being abused there are some helpful links below.
https://mensallianceni.co.uk/
https://belfastwomensaid.org.uk/
https://www.gov.uk/guidance/domestic-abuse-how-to-get-help
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#financialabuse #coercivecontrol #darrenmagee
5
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Agents of the Narcissist How to Deal with Flying Monkeys
In the third part of the series Darren Magee discusses Agents of the narcissist, and how to handle flying monkeys. The abusers who carry out an agenda to continue the narcissistic abuse of spreading lies, and smear campaign, gaslighting and stalking. So how to handle the different types of flying monkey?
Different types include:
-Those who are 'ghosting', ignoring
-The malignant type who love gossip, constantly poke for a reaction (reactive abuse)
- hose who stalk, 'go fishing' for information to feedback to the narcissist, look for something to trip you up with.
-The fearful, who carry out the abusers agenda out of fear for themselves
-The naive, those who think they're helping or trying to fix your relationship
-Respond, don't react
-Act with integrity
-Be polite and measured
-Recognise when you are being provoked, withdraw if you have to
-Don't fall for reactive abuse tactics
-Be assertive, not aggressive
-Block numbers, social media if you have to
-Behave with self respect and dignity
-Don't forget why you left
-Have limited, safe, measured contact.
-Don't go looking for revenge
-Don't set out to antagonise
-Don't become the very thing they accuse you of
Most of all - STAY SAFE
Agents of the Narcissist https://youtu.be/myrHTrzmDP0
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#flyingmonkeys #narcissticabuse #narcissism
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Agents of the Narcissist The Flying Monkey
In this video Darren Magee discusses agents of the narcissist aka Flying Monkeys. These are people narcissists recruit to carry out and continue their smear campaign, the controlling behaviour on their behalf.
So why do narcissists recruit others to do their work for them?
- A way of perpetuating the mistreatment, spread rumours, destroy victims reputations.
Different styles - individual, gossip, mobbing, triangulation, stalking, feed information between
Different types of Flying Monkey
1. Naive / fawning - believe whatever their told, try to help
2. Toxic - rumour spreading, victim shaming and blaming, focuses on the victims reactions
3. Invalidator - ignores the victim, blames them for being a victim
4. Cowardly - obeys out of fear of wrath turned towards themselves
5. Trauma bonded / Co-dependant - supports and apologises, worships
Dealing with Agents of the Narcissist https://youtu.be/3dMr1Ua1rB8
Please consider supporting me on Patreon
https://www.patreon.com/dfmagee
#flyingmonkeys #narcissisticabuse #narcissism
23
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