killjoy217

KEP-3/2: This is the second level of a 2003 PC game made by Jesse Petrilla as a means of inspiring patriotism in Americans against the forces of international evil forces. The game is itself a remake of Petrilla's second game, done in a revised game engine. The Soldier is making his way through an Iraqi chemical weapons facility and has to reach an exit on the other side of a large area circled by pillar boxes manned by Iraqi gunners. Playthrough conducted for entertainment purposes only. The Killjoy: Mile Sipka Remember My Advice: Don't Be A Masochist, Winners Use Cheats (in single-player games only). Caution: Some distortion may be present in the soundtrack.

For my money the very best game on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52", this particular game has a pretty bad reputation but that bad rap was due to the players not having a clue on how to play it properly. In this video I will give a detailed explanation on how to play this surprisingly clever and well designed game (although it is never more than passable at best) & in the process you will become a Meong Master like me. My Grade: C+ [Passable] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0051: A cheap example of the plethora of Eurojank PC strip poker simulators that were popular in Europe following the success of American company Artwork and their catalogue of PC strip poker titles, this particular one is as cheap as they come, with the worst illustrations ever seen on a game of this type (I've literally seen high school drawings better than this!) and worst of all no equivalent of the legendary "Artworx Hack" (changing the order of the pictures by renaming the picture files in the game directory) to allow you to see the nudity sooner, so playing this one is gonna be a hard slog. If you want DOS strip poker with more class, stick with either Artworx or Anco. My Grade: D- [Atrocious] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

KEP-3/1: This is a playthrough of Level 1 of "Quest for Saddam", a cheap American shooter made by Jesse Petrilla in 2003. This is the third game he made in his series of patriotic games designed to garner support for US Military interests at the time & is itself a remake of "Quest for Hussein", Petrilla's previous game, only made in a different game engine. The player controls an American soldier who has to take on the [rather buffoonish] Iraqi army & defeat Saddam Hussein. This game is NOT to be confused with "Night of Bush Capturing", which was a stolen version of this game modified by Al Qaeda terrorists. This playthrough was done for entertainment purposes. The Killjoy: Mile Sipka Playthrough conducted on 31st January 2023

The most insane game ever unleashed onto the NES, this addition to the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52" is pure braincell-destroying demented LSD-trip weirdness. You play a pair of fingers up against all manner of random sprites out to break your knuckles while traversing through two levels of pure WTF territory. As a platformer, this is a dog turd, but the insanity of design gives it a boost to "average" status. My Grade: C [Average] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video. And yes, my doggo nephew Gino makes his introduction here... Good Boy, Gino!

AR-0050: An utterly awful bit of dope-headed science fiction mad scientist synthetica comedy about a goofy mad scientist who builds a prototype female android capable of fighting crime, the fembot going up against the most pathetic mad bomber you've ever seen & the local crime gang whose members she keeps getting arrested. Made as a DTV [direct-to-video] release by AIP, this thing is so bad I would rather line my butthole with Tabasco sauce than watch this on a 24 hour loop [but I have it in my collection for reference purposes... hey, I am a masochist for these things, but I very rarely watch it anyway]. My Grade: D- [Atrocious] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

The best regular platformer on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52", this thirteenth game on the multicart has the player control an 8-bit version of Lara Croft with a nice rack exploring a spooky tomb filled with all manner of ghosts, lava pits & giant spider bosses that would make any Lucio Fulci fan proud [I'm also a Fulci fan]. The platforming here can be hair-raising at times, what with the spooks coming at you from all directions and all, but hardcore platformer fans will like this one as a suitable challenge. The only means of attack are an infinite supply of crucifixes. My Grade: C [Average] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0049: During the zombie film invasion of the 2000s, ultra-hackmeister Ulli Lommel decided to make an insanely cheap zombie flick about a serial killer cop getting stalked by his female victims, who have been brought back to life as raccoon-eyed zombies by a group of vigilante voodoo priestesses. I have seen some utter bullhitsa schlock in my time but this unholy creature is the absolute worst zombie film to have come out of the 2000s zombie boom [even "Children of The Living Dead" is better than this even though it is also a D- in my grading book]. Seasoned old horror fans sometimes tell horror stories of how they came across this film for the first time & the torture it inflicted on them... My Grade: D- [Atrocious] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

The only brawler on this multicart [unless you count portions of "Ninja Assault", that platformer I covered before], this has you play a street fighter whose best method of avoiding getting your backside handed to you [probably because your fighting skills here suck], is to avoid getting into fights... ...Interesting... The best way to beat this game is by performing skillful evasion techniques to avoid getting locked into fights with each opponent & to take running the typical "Action 52" gauntlet slowly as the opponents typically spawn in right after the previous one has left the stage. There are big mean bikers who deal double damage who you absolutely must avoid unless you want to get buttsmashed into 8-bit oblivion... While "Slashers" is something of a bad game, the supplementary purpose this game can have as a very valuable teaching tool on how it is sometimes better to AVOID getting into fights than going in preparing to throw hands. As the old saying goes: "The first man to raise his fists is the first to run out of ideas". This is the player's chance to prove they still have ideas left & the evasion tactics will be best used here... My Grade: C [Average] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0048: The debut of legendary Italian director Antonio Margheriti [known by American audiences as "Anthony Dawson"], as well as the start of the Italian space opera boom of the 1960s, most of which was comprised of Antonio's works, this B-grade but having surprisingly decent for the time cut-price model work space movie has an intergalactic reporter pull some strings to get embedded with a deep space rescue crew & they find themselves the last line of defense to protect Earth from a dangerously unstable renegade spaceship whose reactor has created a radiation-filled "death zone" around it that will vaporize anything that gets too close. The reporter ends up being the top story instead of simply covering it. To be honest, despite the passable model effects work, this film [original title is "Space Men" but the international English title is "Assignment: Outer Space", just so you know] is pretty disappointing by today's standards & the basic premise is now dated as heck. That being said, despite being relegated to schlock status this is interesting enough for die hard space movie fans & will be perfectly suitable for young children as there's nothing objectionable in it. My Grade: D+ [Disappointing] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

The last of the three best space shooters on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52", this is an isometric [of sorts] top-down space shooter where you play a space cube starfighter that has to take down other shapes [some looking like an 8-bit knockoff of the Decepticons logo from Transformers] across eight levels. Each level has different enemies with different attributes - some try to keep away from you, some try to kamikaze you, some are fast, some are slow, you get the picture. You need to constantly adjust your tactics if you are to survive this... but even then you're gonna need the Game Genie hacking cheat code for infinite energy if you really want to stand a chance. There are also 1UPs that add extra hit points to your ship, and these are represented by studs that appear on each side of your ship's hull - you can only carry a maximum of four [since you're a cube and all...] but if you lose one, simply wait for the next 1UP to appear then grab it while you can - unlike other games on this multicart, these 1UPs only last on screen for a couple seconds. While technically not exactly a good game [playing this without cheats can be a headache; plus the final level is unfinished and lacks an exit code, meaning if you reach it & defeat the enemies there you're essentially stuck there for good unless you reset your NES console or emulator], it is still one of the best space shooters on the NES "Action 52". My Grade: C [Average] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0047: The first-ever Canadian DTV [direct-to-video] slasher, this el whacko tale of a badass version of Norman Bates who wreaks his revenge on the sorority girls who nearly got him killed feels disjointed & full of eyebrow-scratching moments. A pretty lousy movie although the weirdness on display certainly will pique the interest of Bad Movie Masochists... My Grade: D [Bad] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

Ah yes, the best vertical space shooter on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52" happens to be the one where you protect a city by shooting down "flaming condoms" [or "flaming dog turds"]. Aside from the potential at making endless jokes at this game's expense, the game is very easy to play & has no technical glitches or issues to note. My Grade: C [Average] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0046: An interestingly daft ultra-low-budget post-apocalyptic space flick about a NASA mission to Mars that winds up becoming the last survivors of mankind after Chairman Mao over in Communist West Taiwan detonates a doomsday device that blows Earth into little bits... The shoestring budget this schlocker was operating on shows through painfully & the production even ran out of money, causing it to be shelved until it was revived & had an inconclusive ending tacked on featuring different actors [but most viewers will be hard-pressed to tell, what with the spacesuits, helmets and all]. This is some righteous bullhitsa, right here. My Grade: D [Bad] Any questions, comments or associated trivia about this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

One of the three best space shooters on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52" [which isn't exactly saying a lot, that is...], this is a horizontal space shooter which comprises of three levels & is surprisingly easy to beat without requiring the use of any cheats. You can even do high-scoring runs with this game as it, like many other games on the multicart, loops infinitely. That being said, the game ain't too great - it is just an average game on its own terms but is still technically the best horizontal space shooter on "Action 52"'s roster. My Grade: C [Average] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0045: My second run-in with the likes of infamous Psychotronic director Ted V. Mikels, this 1973 piece of bubblegum occultism concerns the misadventures of a witch who moonlights as a professional assassin for hire while spending time with her coven of young female idiots talking about their past lives wherein they all seem to have been witches in their previous lives as well... Once a witch, always a witch, it seems... A very dumb movie, although Mikels has to be commended somewhat on actually doing a fair degree of research on the topic at hand, even though his research seems on the level of a high school history class lesson... My Grade: D [Bad] BTW despite the title, there is almost no blood, certainly no orgy & no nudity as well in the film, although the witches like to dance around in diaphanous gowns. Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments section for this particular video.

The obligatory ninja-themed game on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52" [remember this was made in 1991, when ninjas were still popular], this has you the player control a ninja whose only means of attack [& thus defense] is to do a spinning jump-kick & to put two sticks together like Peter Cushing in an old Hammer horror movie. You come up against enemy ninjas, vicious [& surprisingly fast] attack dogs & even nasty seagulls. The game has several multi-platform levels [the first is a standard side-scrolling paltformer, the second is a boss battle, the third is a cheap riff on "Battletoads" with you jumping over logs & the fourth is a return to the platforming of the first level], but I only made it as far as defeating the boss ninja in the second level before the game refused to clear the level. The insanely short reaction time makes this a below-average game at best. My Grade: D+ [Disappointing] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0044: In the midst of a whole bunch of el crappo DTV [direct-to-video] B-action schlockers he was making in the dregs of Eastern Europe, Steven Seagal made what can be fairly considered one of the most bizarre films in his catalogue of videostore atrocities - a post-millennial remake of the 1998 Michael Dudikoff DTV B-action flick "Black Thunder", almost right down to the words in the dialogue. Character names are almost identical & the basic premise has been updated from a terrorist operation in Libya to this one's terrorists in Afghanistan, because... well, a need to stay relevant at the very least. This bad movie also had something that no other Seagal movie in the 2000s had - a very softcore lesbian makeout scene [although one of the actresses involved wasn't too keen on the idea, let me put it that way]. Between that & the crazy idea of Steven Seagal playing a fighter pilot when he would be better suited playing one of the bombs in the stealth fighter's payload compartment, this movie blows some serious bullhitsa, but it is pretty funny to watch if you're a Bad Movie Masochist like I am. My Grade: D [Bad] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

You're an ant sent to make a one-ant-army assault on a rival ant nest. Your only means of attack is to [do the real-life ant attack] of spitting formic acid. However, your targets have been alerted & have sent their defenses in to crush you. However you're a pretty crafty ant who has spied on humans playing cover shooters on those magical machines they call "computers" & so you have learnt a few things about using cover... Dedant is an 8-bit equivalent of an arena shooter, where you have to wipe out the enemies that spawn in the playing arena. Your corridor, which you can technically leave at any time to enter the arena if you wish, has two safe zones at each end [bottom left & right corners] that completely protect you from everything - as long as you stay within that space [you can also teleport to the other corner simply by moving past the end of the corridor]. Not a terrible game, as you can possibly beat this using your wits [BTW if an enemy enters your corridor, simply wait in the nearest safe zone until they leave - don't worry about their shots hitting you as your safe zone will make the shot vanish as long as you stay inside that area], but not that great a game either. Using shock assault tactics in this particular game will get you a one-way ticket to insect Heaven... or food for the enemy ant queen's larvae. My Grade: D+ [Disappointing] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0043: For a time in the 1960s, young British director Michael Reeves was a rising star. He made a total of three films [not including his breakout job stepping in to do a James Cameron-in-Piranha 2 finishing job on an Italian horror film that had the original director leave production halfway through] & was doing pre-production work on what was going to be his fourth when he overdosed on barbys, going on his way to Saint Peter's talent scouting call. Hope he's doing well over there... This subject of review was the first of the Reeves Trilogy of Anglo-horror - a somewhat cheesy Italian-English co-production horror comedy where an aging Von Helsing [yes, it is Von here, not Van] helps out a young English newlywed couple from the effects of an EVIL old witch who bodyjacks the young wifey in order to get revenge on the descendants of the angry mob who forced her to take a bath in the local lake centuries before... ...The whole story taking place in Communist Romania in the late 1960s, of course, so plenty of jokes about clumsy pinkos. Pretty much a joke of a film, although if you're a Bad Movie Masochist like I am, this will be good for a nice derisive laugh when you're feeling the blues... My Grade: D [Bad] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

A top-down space shooter on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52", this game has the player control a ship that has to take on various enemy ships in a particularly hazardous region of space. From hazard zones that are disguised as regular space to enemy ships with unpredictable movement thanks to the infamous Action 52 Boss AI code, this is a pretty suckily mediocre game, the only saving grace being that hit point dispensers & 1UPs constantly spawn in [sometimes in impossible to reach areas] that at least gives the player ship some fighting chance, provided they can get to them in time... My Grade: D+ [Disappointing] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0042: While he had an awesome run in the early-to-mid 1990s with his trademark brand of kickass action synthetica [movies about robots, androids & cyborgs], towards the late 90s & upon the arrival of the 21st Century, legendary cult director Albert Pyun [BTW rest in peace, Mr. Pyun] started to have his career go into a dive, starting with this abomination in the editing suite, as Pyun's original version of a burnt-out detective who invents an imaginary bomb expert friend [played by Steven Seagal... yes, this is a Seagal movie] to help him stop a mad IRA bomber turning the city into a massive blast crater, gets transformed by whomever the editor was into a stupidly conventional action flick with Seagal's character getting turned into a real one & Dennis Hopper's scenes inserted in without him meeting anyone else in the cast. Hopper was mighty impressed by it, too! As far as this version goes, it's a bad movie, although I would love to see Pyun's workprint if it ever sees the light of day... Fans of 90s synthetica will be intrigued by the fact that the producers of this film [Nu Image] inserted stock footage from two of their own synthetica into this film - the footage came from "Project Shadowchaser 2: Night Siege" & "Cyborg Cop II". I grew up with those films so I noticed it straight away & I was laughing my head off. My Grade: D [Bad] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

The only tank sim on the infamous original NES multicart of "Action 52", this is essentially an 8-bit reenactment of the 1991 Gulf War ["Operation Desert Storm"] that was going big at the time. You control a grey tank that has to go up against the evil army of "Satan Hosein" [try & guess who they're referring to in real life], who has sent his [pink-coloured] T-72 tanks after you, as well as the occasional infantry mooks. The game is slow as hell, while contrary to popular belief, your tank is not indestructible - about three or four hits & you're a pile of scrap metal. That being said, I've found something that nobody else who has reviewed this game has ever found - allowing those giant "Satan Hosein" figures to run into you will give you an extra life as these figures [which you can't shoot down & disappear about a second after they appear] are actually disguised 1UPs - how's that for a discovery! Other than that, this is boringly slow & something of an endurance test if you're not patient. My Grade: D+ [Disappointing] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

AR-0041: Remember that bad telepic I reviewed long ago called "They Saved Hitler's Brain"? Well, this is the uncut original version I'm covering here - a leaner, tighter, UCLA-student-padding-bullhitsa-free version which also has The Austrian Painter's fiery death by hand grenade explosion in its uncut form. Critically speaking, "The Madmen of Mandoras" was pretty shabby, even by the standards of early-1960s schlock, today it being an almost pathetically dull piece of work, slathered with a thick layer of German cheese... [Psst - does anyone know what the worst kind of cheese Germany produces? I'm not a cheese expert so I'm asking for a friend?] My Grade: D [Bad] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.

You play a pistolero [gunman] who has to wage a war against a Mexican cartel, blasting away cartel gunners while dodging cars & collecting sombreros that give you extra hit points. The enemies use the "Action 52 Boss AI" code, meaning their movement is unpredictable as they move all over the place, while touching any section of water counts as an insta-kill to the player. Playable to an extent, but this is a bad hat of a game... My Grade: D+ [Disappointing] Any questions, comments or associated trivia for this review subject, please leave in the comments for this particular video.