Narcissism with Sam Vaknin

Psychopathic narcissist would imitate a sensitive, much-wronged victim of narcissistic abuse, or an empathic savior-rescuer. S/he then proceeds to reel you in by offering you everything you ever dreamed of. How to Recognize a Narcissist or a Psychopath on Your First Date, Before It is Too Late? https://groups.google.com/g/NARCISSISTIC-PERSONALITY-DISORDER/c/XpBghb0rZL0 How to Spot an Abuser on Your First Date: The Tocsins of Abuse https://samvak.tripod.com/abuse7.html How to Recognise a Narcissist? https://samvak.tripod.com/faq58.html Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

According to the dual mothership principle, when you break up with the narcissist or are discarded by him, you are orphaned. You need to parent yourself. Here's how: See yourself: document yourself, revisit yourself, be your friend and mentor, get to know yourself. Frustrate yourself, push yourself away (give yourself space), allow yourself to separate, individuate, and form proper boundaries, reality testing, get rid of magical thinking. At the same time, be your own secure base: empathic, attuned, caring, loving, accepting. Invest in and prepare yourself for physical reality, social reality (socialization), hegemonic culture (acculturation), and skills acquisition: research, skills acquisition, education, training. Love yourself. Self-love is a healthy self-regard and the pursuit of one's happiness and favorable outcomes. It rests on four pillars: 1. Self-awareness: an intimate, detailed and compassionate knowledge of oneself, a SWOT analysis: strengths, weaknesses, others's roles, and threats; 2. Self-acceptance: the unconditional embrace of one's core identity, personality, character, temperament, relationships, experiences, and life circumstances; 3. Self-trust: the conviction that one has one's best interests in mind, is watching one's back, and has agency and autonomy: one is not controlled by or dependent upon others in a compromising fashion; 4. Self-efficacy: the belief, gleaned from and honed by experience, that one is capable of setting rational, realistic, and beneficial goals and possesses the wherewithal to realize outcomes commensurate with one's aims. Self-love is the only reliable compass in life. Experience usually comes too late, when its lessons can no longer be implemented because of old age, lost opportunities, and changed circumstances. It is also pretty useless: no two people or situations are the same. But self-love is a rock: a stable, reliable, immovable, and immutable guide and the truest of loyal friends whose only concern in your welfare and contentment. WATCH Love Yourself: Here’s How - or, The Four Pillars of Self-love https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2vzBf9QvClo WATCH Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: First Separate, Individuate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95QBUV9CR_4 WATCH How to Individuate, Heal from Narcissistic Abuse https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3gmcbWsyBM Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

The elites are taking advantage of our existential loneliness and paralyzing anxiety. We need to unseat the elites by embarking on a grassroots revolution which would involve: self-seeing, storytelling, and networked community cells. When no one else sees us, we see ourselves as a form of self-soothing. Narcissism is everywhere, even in fashion, the food industry and physics! It is an organizing principle of our civilization, not merely a clinical entity. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

This is an informal, non-clinical, fun test, based on my observations during my 2 years as a professional gambler in my youth. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Vaknin Talks Full transcripts of Sam Vaknin's videos https://vaknin-talks.com/ Android App: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.vaknin_talks.twa Watch Narcissistic Families: Pseudomutual, Pseudohostile https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8gEjo37S5Bw Watch Toxic Family Holidays Gathering Survival Guide https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=MbtHlhkofc0 The family acts as a single organism (an enmeshed system) and is exclusionary (xenophobic or paranoid) or permissive (promiscuous or unboundaried) Emphasizes appearances and perfectionistic (pseudohostile or pseudomutual) Provides a selective interface between internal and external realities (defenses) Enforces a narrative (cultish) Reinforces emerging roles and competitive hierarchies Is ambient or implicit (hidden text), not overt and explicit Makes use of emotional blackmail, ostracism, and coercion Is sexually and emotionally inappropriate (wrongful intimacies) Is past or future oriented, but never mindful (present) or content A sink and an amplifier of negative affects Allows for role reversals (parentifying or adultifying) Its members are ego dystonic, unhappy, anhedonic, depressed, anxious, even suicidal and always eager to flee its confines and never look back Reifies insecure attachment styles and mental health issues (“They are all so dour … grandiose … reticent …”) Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

WATCH Narcissist Entrains Codependent, Borderline: Brainwash, Regulate, Repeat https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHAeew65frU WATCH How to Individuate, Heal from Narcissistic Abuse https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3gmcbWsyBM WATCH Narcissistic Abuse Recovery: First Separate, Individuate https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=95QBUV9CR_4 The shared fantasy results in a mass psychogenic illness affecting both members of the couple as well as in the victim's prolonged grief disorder. This is because the grooming phase involves the induction of a trans or pseudo-hypnotic dissociative state in the suggestible targets: amnesia, depersonalization, derealization (gaslighting), and fantasy (paracosm). The abuser entrains ("brainwashes") the abused party's mind and deploys intermittent reinforcement, approach-avoidance, trauma bonding, and abuse in all its forms to effect a transfer of regulatory functions from the victim to himself. The entrainment of the abuser's intimate partner consists of the reorganization of her mind so that it generates nonautonomous cognitions and emotions ("artefacts") intended to make sense of the shared fantasy. These linger long after it is over. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Watch Narcissist's Psychological Defense Mechanisms https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1AOJXOoQz3k The evolutionary conundrum: why would evolution allow for self-deception? Defenses separate internal reality (instincts, pain, guilt, shame, fear, anxiety) from external reality to avoid conflict, real dangers, interpersonal failures, and anxiety (they are anxiolytic). They are, therefore, dissociative. Narcissists have no functioning ego and only primitive defenses. Borderlines have a functional ego, but their defenses are either primitive or compromised. They reflect an internal working model of a bad object (I am inadequate, will catastrophically fail, am a danger to myself, need to be defended from myself). To avoid ego dystonic conscious contact with the bad object, the defenses remain unconscious. To affect reality and render it ego-congruent, they operate via behaviors (watch my video on IPAM). Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

2 of every 3 people gave the silent treatment. It is increasing as alternative modes of interpersonal communication become mainstream. Silent treatment is (1) efficiently punitive (2) social (takes a perpetrator and a target) (3) manipulative (controlling) (4) emotionally distant (5) exclusionary (6) plausibly deniable (element of gaslighting: not abuse) (7) coercive (forces the victim to apologize) (8) alloplastic (9) preserves negative affects (10) addictive (11) expressive (displeasure, disapproval, frustration, anger, disappointment, contempt) (12) creates uncertainty (13) attention-seeking (14) negating Shunning, stonewalling, ghosting, blocking, banning, deleting comments between individuals – but not Tactical ignoring. Passive givers perceive silent treatment as graceful, dignified, and conflict-avoidant. Responsive to pressured requests, pleas, demands, or criticism. Both verbal and bodily (avoidance of eye contact, physical distance) Generates in both giver and receiver threatened needs of belonging, self-esteem, and meaningful existence. Giver’s perceived control enhanced. Activates same area in brain that codes for physical and emotional pain anterior cingulate cortex. What to do about silent treatment? Chill rather than silent treatment: ‘I can’t talk to you right now, but we can talk about it later, in 1 hour.’ Voice the pain of being ignored (Margaret Clark, psychology professor at Yale) Set Healthy Boundaries Communication protocols (I statements and naming the situation) Acknowledge other person’s feelings Apologize only if justified, do not reward (positively reinforce) silent treatment Practice self-care Don’t take it personally Stay calm Use humor Avoid escalation, blaming, shaming Seek help and succor LITERATURE Williams, K. D., Shore, W. J., & Grahe, J. E. (1998). The Silent Treatment: Perceptions of its Behaviors and Associated Feelings. Group Processes & Intergroup Relations, 1(2), 117–141. https://doi.org/10.1177/1368430298012002 Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Narcissist is in a constant state of NDE, inhabits an inner landscape of internal objects, absent from reality. Borderline is in a constant state of NDE, absent from her inner world. The abused and traumatized child was not allowed to become (separate-individuate) and so remained in a state of suspended mental animation, dead inside (emptiness or empty schizoid core). Introjects represent significant figures the same way NDE patient meets up with deceased relatives. Borderline depersonalizes the same way an NDE patient hovers about her body and observes resuscitation attempts. Both hear voices the same way an NDE patient does. But they do not misidentify or misconstrue the sources of the voices as external (not psychotic). Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Childhood sexual abuse often results in BPD, DID (mainly OSDD) in adulthood. Victims of sexual abuse in childhood dread and sexualize intimacy and being loved because they misidentify and conflate those with pain and boundary wrecking abuse. Sex becomes an anxiety reaction or stress response. The strategies used by these children, starting in adolescence involve: self-objectification, absenting oneself from sex and intimacy via dissociation (most notably derealization, depersonalization, and amnesia), and self-punitive choices intended to restore the good object (by penalizing and subduing the bad one). Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

When lovebombing is an integral part of coercive control, intermittent reinforcement, and not the behavioral outcome of mental illness - it should be criminalized. But we are treading a thin line: we are beginning to criminalize flirting, courtship, intimacy, and sex. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Narcissists attend therapy if: 1. It caters to their grandiosity; 2. It fits well with the shared fantasy; and 3. They have hit rock bottom. The therapist must amplify the narcissist's pathologies in order to get rid of them. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

BPD suffer from persecutory delusions, paranoid ideation as an instrument to extricate themselves from engulfment/enmeshment anxiety. The persecutory dynamic is either autoplastic (I am a bad object abuser) or alloplastic (I am a victim). When there is a failure of the defense allowing the Borderline to convert an idealized object to a persecutory object, she can’t regard herself as a victim, but only as bad object, an abuser. This ego dystony leads to decompensation and acting out. Borderline legitimizes forbidden, repressed introjects, resonates with pathological parts in her intimate partner, becomes a vector of contagion. Borderline is the mirror image of the narcissist: She has introject inconstancy, he has object inconstancy. She considers herself as a bad object externally but not internally, he considers himself a bad object internally but not externally. The Borderline encourages the narcissist to interact exclusively with his internal objects because she doesn’t want him to realize that she is an external, bad object. She considers herself bad and flawed: “If he gets too close to me, he will abandon me; if he finds out the truth about me, he will run away. Better that he should live in a fantasy”. She incentivizes and reinforces his pathological fantasy defense. Feeds him with drama and conflicts to keep him busy and distracted as he desperately attempts to realign, reframe, and redefine his internal objects. Borderline pushes narcissist to become psychotic while narcissist pushes borderline to become a psychopath. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Craving attention, teasing men, sexually frigid, tormented by introjects, collapses: Histrionic Personality Disorder (HPD). Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Narcissists commit suicide as a way to re-assert and restore their grandiosity. LITERATURE Narcissistic Personality Disorder: Recognition and Treatment, Elsa Ronningstam, Ph.D., Igor Weinberg, Ph.D., Focus: The Journal of Lifelong Learning in Psychiatry, Spring 2013, Vol. XI, No. 2 Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

The narcissist reacts with borderline-style emotional dysregulation, decompensation, and acting out to deficient narcissistic supply, narcissistic injury, and narcissistic mortification. Current therapies attempt to harness the narcissist's grandiosity and fantasy defense to effect transformation and behavior modification in lieu of an adult therapeutic alliance. This often results in even more impaired reality testing even as the narcissist adapts himself to the demands he faces. In short: it induces dissociative and schizoid reactance (as a form of passive-aggressive defiance). The solution is to transition from manipulative dependency on narcissistic supply to self-reliant and anxiolytic albeit delusional self-supply. Transition from external supply to self-supply is also a regression from object relations to primary or introverted narcissism with cathexis of infantile narcissistic structures. This creates an addictive dependency of the False Self on internal structures and processes, a kind of estrangement, as if the False Self has been not only introjected but also projected. Paradoxically, this allows the narcissist to experience a healthy differentiation of external from internal objects. Self-supply also guarantees a sense of secure base and open the door to good enough self-parenting. It is a bit like self-soothing. Self-supply skirts all the pitfalls of narcissistic injuries and mortifications and the one upmanship power play with the therapist. Self-supply is regulatory: it stabilizes the sense of self-worth, restores an internal locus of control, and diminishes the need or opportunity for alloplastic defenses. The fact that all good things (supply) emanate from the inside counters the pernicious effects of the bad object and reduces the frequency of antisocial or non-sublimated misconduct. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Women are way more prone to narcissistic mortification than men. Self-styled experts confuse narcissistic mortification with narcissistic injury. Narcissistic mortification Narcissistic mortification, is a sudden sense of defeat and loss of control over internal or external objects or realities, caused by an aggressing person or a compulsive trait or behavior. The entire personality is overwhelmed by impotent ineluctability and a lack of alternatives. But, the only true solution to a mortification is the regaining of control and, even then, it is only partial as control had clearly been lost at some point and this cataclysm can never be forgotten, forgiven, or effectively dealt with. The need to reframe narcissistic mortification is because – as an extreme and intolerably painful form of shame-induced traumatic depressive anxiety – it threatens the integrity of the self, following a sudden awareness of one’s limitations and defects (Lansky, 2000 and Libbey, 2006). When they are faced with their own hopeless “unlovability, badness, and worthlessness”, mortified people experience shock, exposure, and intense humiliation, often converted to somatic symptoms. It feels like annihilation and disintegration. Narcissistic Injury An occasional or circumstantial threat (real or imagined) to the narcissist's grandiose and fantastic self-perception (False Self) as perfect, omnipotent, omniscient, and entitled to special treatment and recognition, regardless of his actual accomplishments (or lack thereof). Narcissistic Wound A repeated or recurrent identical or similar threat (real or imagined) to the narcissist's grandiose and fantastic self-perception (False Self) as perfect, omnipotent, omniscient, and entitled to special treatment and recognition, regardless of his actual accomplishments (or lack thereof). Narcissistic Scar A repeated or recurrent psychological defence against a narcissistic wound. Such a narcissistic defence is intended to sustain and preserve the narcissist's grandiose and fantastic self-perception (False Self) as perfect, omnipotent, omniscient, and entitled to special treatment and recognition, regardless of his actual accomplishments (or lack thereof). Additional videos on narcissistic mortification: https://www.youtube.com/@samvaknin/search?query=mortification Daria Zukowska's YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@dariazukowskapsychologkliniczn Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Overperception bias: Sexual (men) Intimacy (histrionic) Threats (paranoid ideation) Slights (hypervigilance and referential ideation) Narcissistic supply (grandiosity: when bias meets distortion) Abandonment-Engulfment (borderline personality organization) LITERATURE Brady, W.J., McLoughlin, K.L., Torres, M.P. et al. Overperception of moral outrage in online social networks inflates beliefs about intergroup hostility. Nat Hum Behav (2023). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41562-023-01582-0 Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Social media were designed to attract "eyeballs" and monetize them via targeted advertising. To guarantee repeat use, the technology fostered the diminishment of impulse control and delayed gratification and emphasized relative positioning (envy and status via ranking). It also deliberately rewarded escalating aggression. These led to the operant conditioning of the users of these platforms and to addictive behaviors. Addiction, in turn, engendered a reduced capacity for intimacy and for the self-regulation of the user's sense of self-worth and identity. Attention-seeking and grandiosity resulted in dysempathy (enhanced pathological narcissism). With Moshe Fabrikant of Israel (https://www.youtube.com/@moshefabrikant1) Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

A guided tour of the phantasm that is the narcissist: a dark space, replete with nightmares, imaginary beings, divinities, and extreme mental illness. With Moshe Fabrikant of Israel (https://www.youtube.com/@moshefabrikant1) Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Diagnostic manuals are broken. We need to a whole new conception of mental illness. Richard Dawkins would have called his book “The Selfish Brain” had he read the second edition (2014) of Sue Gerhardt’s masterpiece of popular science, “Why Love Matters”. Our brains are a work in progress well into the 25th year of life. They remain neuroplastic for the rest of our mortal coil. Babies are born prematurely, with their brains half-formed. It is the role of the maternal figure (typically, the mother) to facilitate the maturation of this magnificent organ via tactile stimuli, sensa, speech, and above all, good enough mothering. Putting the finishing touches to our brains is our main and only undertaking in life well into our twenties. In effect, we grant access to other brains so as to form cerebral networks with family, friends, peers, teachers, and role models. Our brains apart, our bodies are incidental until we are ready and fit to procreate. Adulthood involves the unwinding of these earlier promiscuously open networks. The brain is firewalled and fortified by reality reframing and filtering defense mechanisms and narratives. Emotions and cognitions mediate our experiences. We become increasingly more solipsistic as we age, culminating in death, the ultimate in schizoid states. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

False dichotomies: artificial vs. natural, nature vs. nurture (genes are merely internal environment). The concept of "nature" is a romantic invention. It was spun by the likes of Jean-Jacques Rousseau in the 18th century as a confabulated utopian contrast to the dystopia of urbanization and Darwinian, ruthless materialism. The traces of this dewy-eyed conception of the "savage", his alleged harmony and resonance with nature, and his unmolested, unadulterated surroundings can be found in the more malignant forms of fundamentalist environmentalism and in pop-culture (the most recent example of which is the propaganda-laden cinematic extravaganza, “Avatar”). At the other extreme are religious literalists who regard Man as the crown of creation with complete dominion over nature and the right to exploit its resources unreservedly. Similar, veiled, sentiments can be found among scientists. The Anthropic Principle, for instance, promoted by many outstanding physicists, claims that the nature of the Universe is preordained to accommodate sentient beings - namely, us humans. Industrialists, politicians and economists have only recently begun paying lip service to sustainable development and to the environmental costs of their policies. Thus, in a way, they bridge the abyss - at least verbally - between these two diametrically opposed forms of fundamentalism. Similarly, the denizens of the West continue to indulge in rampant consumption, but now it is suffused with environmental guilt rather than driven by unadulterated hedonism. Still, essential dissimilarities between the schools notwithstanding, the dualism of Man vs. Nature is universally acknowledged. Modern physics - notably the Copenhagen interpretation of quantum mechanics - has abandoned the classic split between (typically human) observer and (usually inanimate) observed. Environmentalists, in contrast, have embraced this discarded worldview wholeheartedly. To them, Man is the active agent operating upon a distinct reactive or passive substrate - i.e., Nature. But, though intuitively compelling, it is a false dichotomy. Man is, by definition, a part of Nature. His tools are natural and so are his constructions, the built environment. Man interacts with the other elements of Nature and modifies it - but so do all other species. Arguably, bacteria and insects exert on Nature far more influence with farther reaching consequences than Man has ever done. Even an environmentalist like Bill McKibben of “End of Nature” fame, recognize this synergetic confluence. “To Think Like a Mountain” (Aldo Leopold) gradually came to be challenged by “To Think Like a Mall” (Steven Vogel). We should consider the entirety of our surroundings argues Vogel and seek to optimize our environment regardless of its origin: manmade or “natural”. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

There are two forms of supply: narcissistic and sadistic. They both serve to buttress grandiosity, a cognitive distortion. In any given environment, the narcissist feeds off either narcissistic supply or sadistic supply - never both. Where the locus of grandiosity is narcissistic (example: “I am a good father, husband, or boss”) or histrionic (attention) - sadistic supply would actually be perceived as negative and result in a narcissistic injury! Psychopaths who are also sadistic and sadists (people with the now discarded diagnosis of sadistic personality disorder) seek only sadistic supply. Finally, borderlines alternate between the two types of supply, depending on their self-state. Like narcissists, borderlines are fantasy-prone and grandiose. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Need to be seen (even via self-supply own-audience) vs. need to not be seen by others and/or by oneself to avoid shame. Relationships (including therapy) are about being seen: provoke dissonance, even threat (being seen and seeing oneself which trigger life-threatening shame). Shame is gap in perception of how you should be (ego ideal) vs. belief that you are not as you ought to be. Guilt goes with shame, shame can go without guilt or projected guilt (accusing others for causing one shame, mistreating one). Ego ideal can be realistic and healthy or entitled and fantastic. Gap with reality generates concatenated shame (self-loathing) and anxiety in the wake of (sets up for) failure or avoidance. Solutions: Change fantasy or Change reality. Fantasy inversion owing to intolerable grandiosity gap: from positive to negative (cognitive dissonance). Narcissist’s self-perception is never real, only fantastic (all-positive aggrandizing godlike or total bad object). Easier to match negative fantasy with reality. Restores calm and safety (my self-judgment is correct). The negative fantasy is also grandiose: uniquely self-destructive and self-defeating bad object. Success in realizing it is self-supply. When life matches fantasy, it yields comfortable ego syntony and makes it difficult to change one’s life. Negative fantasies create shame because it follows a failure with a positive fantasy. Cathecting the negative fantasy proportional to shame regarding the failed positive fantasy. Positive fantasy: gap with reality; Negative fantasy: gap with abandoned positive fantasy. Self-fulfilling prophecy: behaviors determined to avoid dissonance with the negative fantasy. Romantic jealousy is a negative fantasy Cost of the negative fantasy: dissociation and identity disturbance. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3

Enduring Personality Changes After Catastrophic Events (EPCACE) is the bridge between cPTSD and PTSD. Late onset (adulthood) trauma is far worse than personality disorders that are the outcomes of early childhood abuse. LITERATURE 1. How Catastrophe Can Change Personality, Sep 26, 2019 Gen Tanaka, MD, Hansen Tang Psychiatric TimesPsychiatric Times Vol 36, Issue 9 2. Preserve Enduring Personality Change After Catastrophic Experience (EPCACE) as a diagnostic resource, Gen Tanaka, Hansen Tang, Omar Haque, Harold J Bursztajn Published: May, 2018 DOI:https://doi.org/10.1016/S2215-0366(18)30126-3 3. Diagnosis and classification of disorders specifically associated with stress: proposals for ICD-11. World Psych. 2013; 12: 198-206, Beltran R, Silove D 4. Expert opinions about the ICD-10 category of enduring personality change after catastrophic experience. Compr Psychiatry. 1999; 40: 396-403 Bursztajn H, The healing power of photographs. Psychiatr Times. 2017; 34: 8 5. Lasting personality pathology following exposure to severe trauma in adulthood: retrospective cohort study, by Jasna Munjiza, Dolores Britvic & Mike J. Crawford BMC Psychiatry volume 19, Article number: 3 (2019) Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: https://www.amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3