"but anger is a sin..." or is it?

Part of our progress into civilisation has been to stop throwing rocks at each other.

To not club our neighbour over the head, and steal their goat like our cave people ancestors likely did, justifying that we own what we can steal. And they own, only what they can defend.

To accept civic values, that I sacrifice my desires to accumulate all, for the sake of peace.

We get the peace dividend, trust, social cohesion….

However, excessive tolerance leads to obedience &

peacemaking can be a justification for victimisation.

Believe me I know, as a recovering people pleaser.

But what conditioning brought about that belief?

One of the most well-known in the Christian tradition is the phrase “to turn the other cheek”

This verse is in the gospel of Matthew, chapter 5, verse 39:

“But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also.”

Ok, in isolation, it seems clear that we shall be non-reactive.

But continue reading and we have in the same gospel of Matthew, chapter 21, verses 12-14:

“Jesus entered the temple courts and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves. ****“It is written,” he said to them, “‘My house will be called a house of prayer,’ but you are making it ‘a den of robbers.”

A clear example of boundaries being crossed, and active demonstration of re-setting norms to the exclusion of those who offended.

There are examples across traditions and philosophy such as the Stoics and Buddhist teachers.

It’s incredibly important to investigate our responses, especially if we have learnt to regulate the emotional experience of others, to provide ourselves with a framework that comes from a moral and authentic foundation.

That way when we see potential exploitation we can actively defend against it.

Anyone can speak if they are passionate enough, and our job is to become passionate about our sense of self-worth.

This and more at the upcoming retreat “the other side of anxiety” September 14. Details in the usual place.

To your healing 💙,

Jas