Theological Jitters and being torn apart by competing demands

I can see how I'm to blame for the competing interests of 4 different denominations tearing me apart while I try to stay loyal to the different parts that seem contradictory in the different groups of christians, but I can see value in the different ways of approaching the topic, I follow the avenging god aspect mostly, but that's because I'm the recipient of that treatment and I'm worried I'll lapse into nonchalance towards god if I engage in the positive affirmations aspect of god's character