10 months ago

A music video portraying the emotions, guilt, and grief felt from the passing of a brother.

Lyrics, Vocals, & Video by Jaiz
http://jaizmusic.com
Beat by E-Motion-L Productions
http://soundclick.com/emotionlproductions

Jaiz Music Links
Website : http://JaizMusic.com
ReverbNation - http://www.reverbnation.com/Jaiz
Facebook - http://www.facebook.com/jaizmusic

Lyrics
As the days go by, I still can't grasp it
And I keep thinking about you
I miss you

The echoes of our mother hysterically crying
Trying to find it in herself to say the words your brother died
And I just did not know how to react I just went numb
I called my sister and I couldn't even show enough love
To see her when she said that she just didn't wanna be alone
And I don't know if I'll ever forgive myself for saying no
Too many times in my life to even be a decent brother
So the least that I can do is be the one to listen to our grievin' mother
When she's crying cause you were her whole life
Still wondering if she could have prevented that night
And who knows what the future held I just know that in the past
I just couldn't be a brother so many times when u had asked
To make music together and one day we could get back
To being as close we were if I did maybe your path
Through life could've been different but I've always been so selfish
And don't wanna be bothered but you were only trying to help me

(Chorus)
In my dreams I can see you
See you again
Sometimes I ask why
Why do I still cry?
Cause even with all the teardrops falling from my eyes
They still won't bring you back here
No they won't so I hope
In my dreams you will appear

So many opportunities I just let slip away
Where we coulda been the friends we were as children but misery has played
The role of Satan in my life like I made him my wife
But never could get a divorce but half of myself was taken and lost
In the fires of hell I kept trying to excel
But everytime that I have risen I fell
You tried to help but I looked at you as a burden
I kept seeing a damned person leavin' our mother wit no cash fast as she was cursin'
Your name and all I saw was the pain
I saw your damaged brain that was driving everyone insane
And I had blamed you for so many years for causing so many tears
And maybe no one could have saved you but I'm blaming my ears
For just ignoring the cries of help from a lost brother
Cause underneath my bitter mind was our love for each other
And underneath your flaws was my friend who was the idol of a little
boy
Why did I have to believe that was destroyed?

The last months of your life was such a blessing
Cause you cleaned yourself up enough for us to regain a connection
And I got to see the brother that I knew from long ago
Got to see the person that had yearned for more than what corrupted his soul
I got to be your friend one more time
Before your last fall I'm glad my eyes saw you rise
But it wasn't your time to go it wasn't the time for the end
Not when your life was beginning again it's all too hard to comprehend