Faith Seeking Understanding

Webb to Porter: “I Done Heard of Be Very Careful for That Four Witches You Pray, But Dang, Yo.”

[FOB FREEDOM, June 16, 2023] Any station? Any station? Do you read? Over.

Reporting live from the world’s newest banana republic, . . .

There has not yet even been a “Webb Moves Closer to Qualifying for the Ballot” headline, in a petition drive campaign that had begun in January, and the not a serious option, fringe independent candidate has been like Keifer Sutherland had described the Klan: “never gone away; they’s just been under the surface”. And at least in the past it had been acknowledged that the passionate and pesky porn tab guy, about whom the words “commando”, “scorched earth” and “onslaught” came to the minds of war-hardened Arlington Democrats and analysts whenever he had attempted to qualify for a ballot, had been floating around the periphery for almost a decade. But, after running around, knocking on doors, discussing a subject that not even one Arlington Democrat running for office would dare to address, the official word from the Arlington County Board of Elections regarding their “in process” candidate in Virginia’s Third District is: “you don’t have to get any more signatures.”

“I am assuming this means, with the deadline approaching for ballot qualification, I have finally managed to obtain the required 125 signatures, and it only took six months, and apparently my email and express mail package from the post office to the State Board of Elections had suffered the same fate as my letter to the Vatican back in 2016, which took 21 days to arrive because the Vatican was closed for the holidays, according to officials at the International Division at Federal Express, when your package absolutely, positively has to be there overnight,” remarked Major Mike Webb.

Whether on the ballot, or as a write-in, the guns-blazing Webb is packing a strong punch, adding to his spreading of medical misinformation door-to-door, information so Sancto Santorum information that like Yahweh not even the name can be uttered aloud, on the 28th, with already a petition on review at the State Supreme Court on the infection and death of Bishop Gerald Glenn, seeking to compel the first grand jury investigation into a COVID-19 related death, a topic that even the Republican State Attorney General Jason Miyares is avoiding like the plague, Merrick Garland’s favorite litigation hobbyist is pressing forward against the formerly unopposed Alexandria prosecutor who had thought he was doing something right, with only 243 COVID-19 fatalities in his city to a virus for which not even the Intelligence Community can locate the proximal origins, the Arlington and Alexandria Republicans running away from the ballot and a chance to go head-to-head against the Arlington Democrats have decided to pass on weighing in on the infection of Pastor Don Davidson, the former Senior Pastor of the First Baptist Church of Alexandria, his wife and the Graveson family who had been members of that Southern Baptist Church.

“What do they call MI up in New York City, Chief? They call MI missed the tips,” laughed Webb.

Note: grandiosity is a classic sign of bipolar disorder, and we don't want to hurt his feelings lest he go to “that place”, so familiar to Arlington Public School Board Member, Latina Cristina Torres-Diaz.

Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim-cherry. A pandemic agent as lucky can be. Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim--achoo. The luck'll rub off when I bump fists with you. Or blow me a kiss, and catch COVID-2.

Your elected representative is called your elected representative for a reason; and Martin Luther King and Jesus never got elected.

And let’s get ready to RUMBLE! https://rumble.com/vp2uk1-attorneys-need-not-apply-you-have-the-right-to-remain-silent.html.