Meghan Markle: FORGIVE ME Godfather For I Have SINNED (Part 1)

2 years ago
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Meghan requests the assistance of the Godfather - will he offer his help, or deliver a few home truths to the famously brittle Duchess of Sussex...?

#HarryandMeghan #meghanmarkle #parody #interview #meghan #satire #thesussexes #godfather #doncorelone #marlonbrando #impressions

Transcript:

M: The reason I am here today, Godfather, is because, I’ve been doing some soul searching and retracing my steps from the past, and it brought me to some conclusions

(Godfather expression)

M: Things haven’t always gone well, I’ve been like an inexperienced Princess trapped in the dungeon of royal traditions

G: Poor you.

M: So I’ve made mistakes, my judgement has been off. Perhaps even some of my judgements haven’t been a pure as I demand others should have for each other

G: It’s a common occurrence.

M: Yeah, a little bit of anger, like a, calculated rage

G: So you come to the conclusion that the effects of your bad behaviour include feeling unsettled inside.

M: Yeah absolutely. I’ve got to sit in the lotus positions, drink literally 7 vegan chai lattes and eat a a whole avocado, stone and all, before I can start to feel some semblance of stability

G: You are lucky to be thinking this way. I’ve met you on a few occasions now, never once did I think someone as repugnant as you would find such an insight, but it seems I was wrong

M: Thank you. Yeah, I just need properly acknowledge what was going on in my soul, right?, To try and reconcile the dissonant wavelengths that I’m receiving, right, constantly

G: I’m starting to lose my optimism on where this is going

M: And I realised that the people who are angry at me or hurt by me or disapprove of any discourtesy they think I might have shown them, are just wrong

(Godfather expression of resignation)

M: Which completely invalidates the suggestion of learning from my mistakes, because I didn’t make any!

G: Almost incredible, isn’t it?

M: Yeah, so what I’m looking for from you is to completely airbrush my history to remove and negative publicity and, like, facts, that are damaging to my name

G: You don’t know me very well, do you Miss
M: Call me Meghan

G: Okay Rachel, you don’t know me very well - because even if I could disinfect your past, I wouldn’t do it

M: Well, what if I made it worth your while

G: No, don’t speak. There’s nothing you have that I want. Nothing you can offer me. The best thing about proffting from a life with shadowy ethics is that you don’t need to be corrupted by low calibre individuals.

M: (eyebrow raise)

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