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Attorney General Merrick Garland on Trump indictment: Justice Department "followed the facts and the law wherever they lead." RELATED: Trump indicted for conspiring to steal 2020 election from Joe Biden » USA TODAY delivers current local and national news, sports, entertainment, finance, technology, and more through award-winning journalism, photos, videos and VR. #Trump #Politics #News

Sure, here are 100 humorous descriptions for dogs and cats: Dogs: 1. This dog thinks fetch is an Olympic sport they're training for. 2. A dog so fluffy, it's like a walking cotton ball with a wagging tail. 3. The canine version of a vacuum cleaner – nothing escapes their snacking radar. 4. If this dog were any more energetic, they'd power the neighborhood. 5. Bark-itect extraordinaire, specializing in designing elaborate squirrel-chasing strategies. 6. This pup's tail is the original happy meter, always set to maximum wag. 7. The only life goal this dog has is to figure out who's a good boy. 8. Their "puppy eyes" game is so strong, they could win an Academy Award. 9. The ultimate nap champion, always in pursuit of the elusive 20-hour snooze. 10. Their sense of direction: squirrel west, treat east, and belly rub central. 11. The tail wags first, the body follows – it's the doggy version of a dance move. 12. Canine fashionista, always accessorizing with leaves, sticks, and bits of nature. 13. This dog's life motto: "Eat, sleep, bark, repeat." 14. They have a PhD in tennis ball physics, specializing in quantum bounces. 15. A walking food critic with an impeccable taste for socks and couch cushions. 16. The expert alarm clock with a built-in snooze button (which is your hand). 17. Canine comedian, their stand-up routine mostly involves chasing their own tail. 18. If curiosity was fur, this dog would be the furriest. 19. The professional squirrel negotiator, barking up the wrong tree with enthusiasm. 20. Tail-chasing enthusiast, forever on a mission to catch the elusive tail end. 21. This dog's favorite game? "Find the human, hide the squeaky toy." 22. A dog so loyal, they'd follow you to the ends of the treat jar. 23. Canine weather reporter, sensing rain before it hits and seeking shelter under your bed. 24. The one-dog welcoming committee, ready to greet guests with a million tail wags. 25. The ultimate zen master, they've mastered the art of doggy meditation. 26. Their ability to turn a simple stick into a full-scale adventure is truly impressive. 27. Pro fetch player, who will retrieve anything – from tennis balls to invisible dreams. 28. The world's most convincing beggar, capable of making treats materialize out of thin air. 29. This dog's dream job? Official belly rub tester. 30. They see squirrels as personal trainers, always keeping them on their toes. Cats: 1. The undisputed ruler of the cardboard kingdom, their cardboard box castle knows no bounds. 2. A master of parkour, this cat turns furniture into an Olympic obstacle course. 3. Their purring is the feline equivalent of a luxury car's engine revving. 4. This cat treats sunbeams like precious treasures and positions themselves accordingly. 5. The original "If I fits, I sits" champion, contorting into the tiniest of spaces. 6. Feline alarm clock, programmed to wake you up at 3 AM for a round of laser pointer chase. 7. Their gaze could melt icebergs, but they prefer to use it to demand treats. 8. This cat's hunting skills are so advanced, they've caught more dust bunnies than you can count. 9. The definition of "cat-itude," they're not aloof, they're just selective with their social interactions. 10. A true yoga master, they've perfected poses you've never seen in any studio. 11. This cat's fur coat is so luxurious, it could rival any celebrity's red carpet attire. 12. The world's tiniest detective, solving mysteries like "Who knocked the vase off the table?" 13. Their curiosity could power a rocket to the moon and back – if only it were harnessed. 14. The stealthy ninja of the household, capable of vanishing into thin air and reappearing on the fridge. 15. Feline fashionista, always accessorizing with a hint of fur on your freshly cleaned clothes. 16. This cat's favorite pastime? Sending objects flying off shelves with a single paw swipe. 17. Their motto: "If I'm not on your keyboard, I'm on your book. And if not there, then your lap." 18. The world's foremost nap researcher, committed to finding the coziest spots in the house. 19. They've mastered the art of the "slow blink" to communicate their love and approval. 20. Professional bug hunter, skilled at turning any buzzing invader into a high-stakes chase. 21. This cat's secret talent? Teleporting from the floor to your face in a nanosecond. 22. A true food connoisseur, they'll nibble on the finest kibble and reject the rest. 23. If grace were measured in tail flicks, this cat would be a prima ballerina. 24. The household archaeologist, excavating hidden treasures from under the couch. 25. They view curtain-climbing as an extreme sport, with your window treatments as the ultimate challenge. 26. The official laptop supervisor, ensuring you never work alone (or with both hands). 27. This cat's middle name is "Mischief," and they live up to it every day. 28. They have a black belt in knocking objects off shelves with pinpoint precision. 29. Feline philosopher, pondering the deeper meaning of life while ignoring the laser pointer. 30. The undisputed king of the "Zoomies," they sprint through the house like a mini tornado. Enjoy these lighthearted descriptions of our furry friends!