Undoing the Stigma
In this video, Sally Erickson and Tim Bennett speak about the cultural stigma attached to needing and seeking relationship coaching or mentoring. Looking at human connections through the lens of Attachment Theory, they argue that it's actually normal to need help and guidance in forming a close, secure marriage or primary relationship, especially in this culture. In their vision for the future, such help will be available in our human communities as a matter of course, with elders and others providing the guidance and example needed, rather than paid professionals.
Sally and Tim can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/ .
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A Deep Dive Into Vulnerability - Inviting Others Into Our Truest Selves
In this video, Sally Erickson and Tim Bennett go deeper into the question of vulnerability: what it is, what it isn't, how it looks, why it can feel so challenging, and why being vulnerable is so essential to close, connected, and truthful relationships. They regard vulnerability as a matter of telling "the whole truth," and the willingness to be vulnerable as a prerequisite to doing true dialogue.
True dialogue may be the most important practice we can engage in, if we wish to heal the polarization and estrangement of this world. And this Dialogue process sits at the heart of the Toward Belonging workshop they'll be facilitating in October of 2023 in Montana.
To learn more about this workshop, visit http://rightrelationships.us/toward-belonging/ .
Sally and Tim can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/ .
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True Dialogue - A Conversation with Tim & Sally (The Director's Cut)
In this expanded version of the video, Sally Erickson and Tim Bennett dive a bit deeper into the practice they call True Dialogue, it's origins, goals, starting agreements, expected results, and how the process looks over the course of three or four days. They regard real dialogue of this sort as the key to close committed relationships, and to healing the polarization of this world. This Dialogue process sits at the heart of the Toward Belonging workshop they'll be facilitating in October of 2023 in Montana.
To learn more about this workshop, visit http://rightrelationships.us/toward-belonging/ .
Sally and Tim can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/ .
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True Dialogue - A Conversation with Tim & Sally
In this video, Sally Erickson and Tim Bennett dive a bit deeper into the practice they call True Dialogue, it's origins, goals, starting agreements, expected results, and how the process looks over the course of three or four days. They regard real dialogue of this sort as the key to close committed relationships, and to healing the polarization of this world. This Dialogue process sits at the heart of the Toward Belonging workshop they'll be facilitating in October of 2023 in Montana.
To learn more about this workshop, visit http://rightrelationships.us/toward-belonging/ .
Sally and Tim can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/ .
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People In Your Life - Introduction Trailer
In this three-part series, Sally Erickson talks about three categories of people in one’s life:
1. Those relationships that one is deeply committed to, but that are currently challenging
2. Those relationships that are troubled, draining, and/or superficial but that one is not ready to give up on, and
3. Those that are draining, possibly damaging and are not truly serving either person’s best interests.
In this video she talks about the first of these and how to begin to build a foundation to deepen the trust so that the relationship can eventually begin to grow in the direction one would prefer.
This series of videos may be especially relevant in this time when people are experiencing much estrangement and polarization, when important relationships have been fractured by social and political divides that are difficult to navigate.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Vulnerability - Part 2: Further Along the Learning Curve
In this second part, Sally Erickson talks more about her own unfinished journey into vulnerability. She speaks about both the benefits and risks of sharing her own experiences of vulnerability with clients, who are on their own journeys. She explores the roles of authorities and experts, and how people in those positions can share their humanness in a way that helps heal those who hear their words.
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Vulnerability - Part 1: On the Learning Curve
Sally Erickson talks about her own unfinished journey into vulnerability. She regards having the courage to risk as the access door to close and authentic connectedness, but can see how hard it has been to be vulnerable in her own life. Even knowing how important vulnerability is, and even though close connection has been her strongest lifelong goal, the path to vulnerability has still been littered with stumbling blocks. At the end, Sally begins to explore why vulnerability can feel harder now than ever.
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Toward Belonging Workshop - October 2023
Sally Erickson and Tim Bennett speak together about their upcoming workshop and retreat, Toward Belonging: Engaging the Power of Listening, Vulnerability, and True Dialogue. The event will take place at a historic hot springs resort in Southwest Montana and will run from October 1st through the 6th, 2023. This 4 and 1/2 day experiential training will explore the question: how do we gain our true belonging without losing our true selves?
To learn more about this workshop, or to contact Sally & Tim, visit our website here http://rightrelationships.us/toward-belonging/
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Toward Belonging Workshop Trailer
In this three-minute "trailer" for the longer interview, Sally Erickson & Tim Bennett share some pithy "teasers" regarding the experience to be had at their October 2023 workshop and retreat: Toward Belonging - Engaging the Power of Listening, Vulnerability, and True Dialogue.
For more information, or to contact Sally and Tim, go to http://rightrelationships.us/toward-belonging/
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Media Fast - Day Four
In this video, Sally Erickson reflects on the fourth and final day of her four-day media fast, in which she completely eliminated her exposure to news, entertainments, and social media, and strictly limited her access to email and text messages.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Media Fast - Day Three
In this short video, Sally reflects on the third day of her four-day media fast, in which she completely eliminated her exposure to news, entertainments, and social media, and strictly limited her access to email and text messages.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Media Fast - Day Two
In this short video, Sally reflects on the second day of her four-day media fast, in which she completely eliminated her exposure to news, entertainments, and social media, and strictly limited her access to email and text messages.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Media Fast - Day One
In this short video, Sally reflects on the first day of her four-day media fast, in which she completely eliminated her exposure to news, entertainments, and social media, and strictly limited her access to email and text messages.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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The Gift of Listening, Part 5: Asking Supportive Questions
In part five of this series, Sally Erickson goes into "advanced listening" territory. If you are really wanting to listen to understand, then one way to go even deeper is to ask questions. But… there are ways to ask questions that can shut people down or provoke defensiveness, and there are ways of asking questions that are supportive and encouraging, and lead to greater closeness and more open dialogue. Sally shares her long experience as a therapist in learning to ask the questions that really help engender healing and connection.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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The Gift of Listening, Part 4: Listening During Conflict
In part four of this series, Sally Erickson talks about the challenges of listening to someone with whom you are in conflict. She shares some specific strategies which can be helpful in such tense and delicate interactions: bracketing your own feelings and reactions, slowing things down, working to understand what's being said, and listening for the truth in what the other is saying.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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The Gift of Listening, Part 3: Listening is Epic (or) What To Do With Those 300 Words Per Minute
In part three of this series, Sally Erickson outlines what it takes to truly "attend" to another person, and why it's important that we begin to do so. She discusses the key concept of "bracketing," where we learn to set aside our own reactive or distracted thoughts so that we can fully hear what's being communicated to us. It truly is an epic skill to master.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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The Gift of Listening, Part 2: 450 minus 150 equals 300
In Part 2, Sally Erickson discusses how we can bring our extra listening capacity online to really attend to the needs and experiences of another, giving them a full of experience of having been heard and understood. Such listening helps to calm people down and open up, and is a fundamental aspect for good relationships.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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The Gift of Listening, Part 1: The Loss of Listening
Sally Erickson begins her series exploring how we, as a society, have largely lost, or been robbed of, our listening skills, and how so many are no longer comfortable in the face-to-face world. This is a fundamental blow to our humanity, Sally thinks, and she will focus the remaining videos in this series on how people can get those skills back.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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People In Your Life, Part 3: Keeping the Door Open
In the third and final part of this series, Sally Erickson explores how one may work with those relationships which are difficult or unsatisfying, but which one is not ready or willing to let go of. Either or both people may put boundaries in place. How to keep the door open to convey that one still values the other person? And how to stay in touch and keep the door open to create a better relationship in the future?
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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People in Your Life, Part 2: Ending Relationships
In this second part of the series Sally Erickson examines how one might let go of a relationship which is no longer serving the best interests of you or the other person in spite of one’s efforts. Relationships of this type are superficial or troubled, and drain one’s energy. Unless they are treasured people in one’s life they may only serve to detract from more important relationships or from finding and/or creating more life-giving relationships. Based on old unresolved patterns of low self-worth, unbalanced care-giving or other unhealed patterns, they may derail one’s own healing journey.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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People In Your Life, Part 1: Committed Connections
In this first of a three-part series, Sally Erickson talks about three categories of people in one’s life:
1. Those relationships that one is deeply committed to, but that are currently challenging
2. Those relationships that are troubled, draining, and/or superficial but that one is not ready to give up on, and
3. Those that are draining, possibly damaging and are not truly serving either person’s best interests.
In this video she talks about the first of these and how to begin to build a foundation to deepen the trust so that the relationship can eventually begin to grow in the direction one would prefer.
This series of videos may be especially relevant in this time when people are experiencing much estrangement and polarization, when important relationships have been fractured by social and political divides that are difficult to navigate.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Choose Well-Being. Instead.
Sally Erickson shares about waking up "less than happy," and her journey away from seeking happiness™ itself, to seeking well-being. On the way she touches on how living one's life authentically can mean breaking the rules, and how the emotional hangover that can result from doing so is actually sign of being on one's path.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Getting Unstuck
Sally Erickson shares her own process for getting unstuck when she feels mired down in her own life. The secret is to recognize that there are feelings inside of you that are getting in your way. Sally speaks about where feelings reside and how to begin to more clearly and usefully access them.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Telling the Truth
If you feel lonely, so do many others. Screens of all sorts are not a substitute for real, genuine human connection. If you spend much of your free time alone and struggle with depression Sally Erickson speaks about how the seemingly simple act of telling the truth about oneself is one key to healing from depression and lack of close friends and family. Perhaps in much "depression," what is being depressed is one's true self. This arises from from hopelessness and lack of skills to create genuinely close, loving relationships. People ache for more real connection and contact.
Time spent with friends and family has dramatically fallen. Between 2010 and 2013 the time spent with friends for the average American was stable, at 6½ hours per week. By 2019, the average American spent only four hours per week with friends. The 2020 enforced social isolation made it worse. Now it has improved somewhat but is not back to the 2019 levels.(https://www.joannejacobs.com/post/home-alone).
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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Telling One's Story
Low self-worth and feelings of shame are common. Sally Erickson discusses the important of telling one’s whole story to someone they can trust to listen without judgement. This involves, in 12-Steps terms, “taking a fearless moral inventory” of one’s life, and then sharing that vulnerably with a compassionate listener, the goal being to defang the shame and guilt that keeps us hobbled and stuck.
Sally and her husband Tim Bennett can be contacted at http://rightrelationships.us/contact/
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