The Protest Show with Thor Ramsey

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPodCentral Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpodcastcentral/ Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpodcastcentral Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod Comedy Is A Language of Protest – The Abortion Special Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls—welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic, episode 15 of Season 2. I’m your host and shoe cobbler-slash-hat maker, Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. This might explain the state of our culture. It’s a little Bible quote. And He was asking him, “What is your name?” And he said to Him, “My name is Legion; for we are many.” And now we have the personal pronoun “they.” Just saying. “My pronouns are Many and Legion.” Welcome to Twitter. It cannot be denied that demons are out in full force now that Supreme Court documents regarding Roe v. Wade have been leaked. The good news is that Ketanji Brown Jackson suddenly knows what a woman is. Elizabeth Warren, someone who confused Ketanji Brown just weeks ago, is very upset. I haven’t seen her so angry since the time her DNA test came back… and she lost her stake in that casino. Rachel Levine was seen wearing a t-shirt that said, “My body, my choice.” You have no arguments there. Many pro-abortionist women are now going on a sex strike, which ironically would prevent more abortions. Where I come from, we call that celibacy. Instead of Planned Parenthood, how about Plan Ahead Parenthood? The plan should come before the oops. Elizabeth Warren claimed that 69% of Americans want abortion to be the law of the land. First, do you know what else the majority wanted? Barrabas. Second, that’s not how Constitutional Law works, Lizbeth. You know, because it’s based on the Constitution. It has nothing to do with majority rule. That’s why you’re still looking for that abortion clause. Just because something’s popular doesn’t make it right. I mean, Hillary Clinton won the popular vote. Third, after forcing the LGBTQ agenda upon us, now you’re concerned about what the majority want? What’s everyone on the left so mad about? It’s not like overturning Roe will stop abortions. They could still go to California because California knows how to take care of problems. Just look at what they’ve done with homelessness, taxes, CRT, drugs, crime on the Metro Link, and the high-speed rail. Where did that money for the high-speed rail go anyway? Something was traveling fast. California’s new slogan: “Go West, young man. But not that far West. Go ahead and slow down in Texas.” Let’s think about this. They’re mad because they can’t kill babies everywhere. And by everywhere, I mean everywhere. Some of them want to do it outside the womb. If some had their way, abortion would be legal until the kid was eighteen. I can imagine their reasoning. I mean, with a baby, you don’t know what you have yet, the next Einstein or the next Hitler, but give them until they’re eighteen, then you can sit down and have that talk with them. “You know, son, you quit school, you still don’t have a job, we’re gonna abort ya.” Anticipating the overturning of Roe v. Wade, Bible in Bulk is launching a new ministry called Babies in Bulk. Adoption is an option. Planned Parenthood plans to move operations in hostile states online. How does an online abortion work? Well, it’s a simple procedure. You tweet “abortion is murder,” and then someone terminates your tweet. Protesting outside of the homes of Supreme Court Justices, some abortionists held signs that said, “If abortion is not safe, then neither are you!” It is shocking that abortionists would display such a wanton disregard for human life. Oh, wait. No, it isn’t. The question is, “Why isn’t anyone being arrested since this is a violation of the law?” Oh, because the date’s wrong. It’s not January 6th, which is the official date people get arrested for protesting after police wave them in. Huh? Other protestors had signs that said, “We will not go back!” [Beat] I fear where you’re going is worse than that. Author and speaker Jen Hatmaker, who used to write Christian lifestyle books, has been getting a lot of notoriety for her recent fiction. Now, I have a question for Christian publications at large. When are you going to stop referring to Jen Hatmaker as a Christian? There is nothing remotely Christian about how she views the world. And I know I’ll be the bad meanie saying this because, you know, who am I to judge except based upon the revelation of God’s will which we find in Holy Scripture where the Apostle Paul tells us we must evaluate, nicer sounding word, those in the church, which Hatmaker claims to be part of. Hatmaker also claims that data “unambiguously” proves that “making abortion illegal doesn’t lower abortion rates.” Really? I’m not sure if I believe that. Why don’t we make abortion illegal and see if it’s true? You know, just as a test. Somehow, no one’s saying for sure, administrations that are pro-abortion in every way, shape, and form somehow have lower abortion rates. We don’t know how exactly, but somehow, maybe because the media keeps repeating it. Hatmaker further argued that abortion is a choice women make for “endless personal reasons including the health of the baby.” Yeah, you heard right: The health of the baby? “I’m a horrible cook. Kill the baby!” If nothing else, her reasoning is that of a leftist. However, many of her followers didn’t agree with her—the Christian ones. “Endless personal reasons.” Could one of those personal reasons be that if you’re a Christian, you would wait to see how many sheep this guy owns before giving up the goods? The first person to recognize Jesus was an unborn child. And here’s Jen Hatmaker all growed up, and she can’t see him right before her eyes. Her books are still in Christian stores, which only proves that conservatives are more tolerant than leftists. Jen Hatmaker may wear many hats, but we know that a MAGA hat will not be one of them. Historically speaking, the most comprehensive birth control has been free for centuries. It is simply the word, “No.” I keep hearing this claim that there were fewer abortions under Obama than under Trump. Politicians have no control over how often people have sex. Not yet. Now that we have a Ministry of Thought, I’m sure it won’t be long until the government promotes National Hump Day. Even if that stat’s true, it had nothing whatsoever to do with Obama’s policies. Unless it was, “Oh, no! We can’t bring a child into this world under this administration.” Or it could have just been white guilt. “Honey, I know you want more children, but they’re gonna be white. People will think we hate Obama.” Isn’t it interesting that as soon as the government rolled out the Disinformation Governance Board, Psaki said, “I’m out. I mean, my job is hard enough, and now you throw me this?” I watched the movie 2000 Mules this last weekend, and it’s causing quite an uproar. You should see it. Now, you can argue all you want about 2000 Mules. What you can’t deny is that jackass in the White House! And it is misinformation that the word jackass appears in the Bible. The word ass appears 80 times in the King James Bible. All that to say, let’s not be more prudish than the Bible itself, folks. Finally, I’m a little tired of hearing sound biblical and popular preachers (in most cases) rail on about how preachers shouldn’t talk about politics from the pulpit. We shouldn’t align with any political party, is the argument. Maybe that was good advice a decade ago. It was my line of thinking until this last election. But I cannot get my mind around how any professing Christian whose view of the world is informed by the biblical text can align themselves with a party that’s platform is not just the death of pre-born children but actual infanticide. “You can’t be a one-issue voter.” Well, you should be, my friend, when that party’s platform is about killing babies. And people can say, “Sure, cheating is found on both sides of the partisan divide,” but it’s proven that Democrats cheat more. Oh, it’s also proven that they kill more babies. And the work of the Democratic party, which claims to be for people of color, has demonstrably made race relations in this country worse. I have three children. I never had the thoughts I’m about to admit to you with my two oldest children. When I’m at the park with my four-year-old son, and he’s playing with children of color, I worry about what they might say to him. Yes, about his race. That’s a sad confession. And I’m always relieved when everything at the park goes well, and the parents don’t seem to hate me because I’m white. And it all stems from the politicization of race, something the Democrats have done expertly. Don’t talk about politics? It’s like the pastor who won’t talk about abortion because it might offend someone in the congregation. And all done under the guise of reaching people. I thought we reached people with the truth, and when we’re afraid to speak the truth in love, we’ve lost. Comedy is a language of protest. That’s our program for today. I want to thank our director, Jefferson Drexler, our executive producer, Joel Fieri, our social media master, Danny Avila, and my co-writer Ron McGehee. I want to thank Christopher Shawn Shaw, our joke tester—who samples every joke for toxic content. (May he rest in peace.) I’d also like to thank Ron Bass for our new intro graphics. If you liked this episode, but sure to click like because there is no “loved it” button. We accept prayers and positive vibes from everyone. We just ask that you take those prayers and positive vibes and wrap them in a check or money order. If you want to fight the rising tide of wokeness in this country, click like to join a genuinely peaceful protest. And please subscribe because that’s the most meaningful vote of all. For more episodes, visit Christian Podcast Central.com I’m Thor Ramsey, and I hope you’re less woke America. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPodCentral Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpodcastcentral/ Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpodcastcentral Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod It sounds made up, but in the United States of America, the land of the free and home of the brave, we now have a Disinformation Governance Board, otherwise known as the Ministry of Propaganda and Public Enlightenment. Or at least it was during the tenure of Goebbels in Nazi Germany. What’s impressive is how sensitive progressives don’t see the direct parallel. So, to answer the question, “Could it ever happen again?” Yes, but they’ll all feel like they’re doing the right thing when they put you in camps. The first question is—how can you govern disinformation when your administration is the source of it? What’s next? Putting Keith Richards in charge of The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms? If they were as concerned about the economy as they were about enforcing the narrative… they’d be canceling gas prices instead of tweets. That’s like saying you want to do something about the drug problem in America, but in your own family… oh, wait. Maybe that’s a little too close to home. Sorry, Joe. Didn’t mean to bring that up. Spoke-ah-z-perzon Jen Psaki said Trump started the Disinformation Governance Board. Then she just went on with her day while the rest of us waited for that little thing called evidence. I was baffled until I found out this was her audition for CNN. Biden quoted his father saying, “The greatest sin of all that anyone could commit was the abuse of power.” So, the apple does fall far from the tree. Let’s look at just a few of President Banana Joe’s abuses of power. First, the Ministry of Thought Control—a clear abuse of power. By someone. Maybe not Joe. Can he even control his own thoughts? “Harvey says that Pooh-Puten is gonna get it.” It’s like Biden is living in a sequel: The Return of Donnie Darko. Second is the Biden Administration’s desire to override parental authority, which favors some third-grade teacher who believes Randall is a girl. Puberty blockers? How about Biden Administration blockers? Speaking of abuse of power. How about “10% for the big guy.” Unless this was Hunter’s way of saying he would tithe part of his kickbacks to church. But where did this abuse of power start? Remember that guy named Obama who spoke to the Big Tech companies expressing his happiness about their attempts to censor “truly dangerous content.” What will this Disinformation Governance Board do? Well, according to Tulsi Gabbard, the Democrat that all conservatives have a crush on, the board would “work through the mainstream media” to spread whatever the chosen narrative was — and that it would do so at taxpayer expense, trying to “drown out anyone with alternate views.” I’m a little confused. Why do we need a Disinformation Governance Board when we have Facebook? And CNN? And MSNBC? And ABC, NBC, CBS and Disney, and every Netflix series and film in Hollywood? She also argued that the board would “silence dissenting voices through intimidation.” What are they gonna do? Threaten that Biden will run again? The only good thing that might come out of the Disinformation Governance Board is that when Disinformation Governance Board: The Musical starring Nina Jankowicz is released—it will be censored. What’s perplexing about the left is that they want to restrict my right to say “abortion is murder” but want to allow the murder of babies. Yeah, I’m waiting for a punch line too. Last night after writing this program, it came to our attention that the Supreme Court decision to overturn Roe v. Wade had possibly been leaked. Next week we’ll do a special episode about all the people in this country who are about to lose their minds. But let me say this, I had eggs for breakfast this morning. And I noticed the carton said “cage-free” eggs because this is a pressing moral issue for people in our culture today—a chicken’s quality of life. “Is that poor chicken just locked in a cage pooping out eggs for my consumption?” And yet, to be concerned about a chicken’s apartment complex and still be pro-abortion is to be guilty of colossal hypocrisy. Oh, I know, I know, the baby’s viability in the womb. Folks, I have Thanksgiving dinner with relatives who aren’t viable yet. One man’s viability is another man’s brother-in-law. So, as our world is about to get even crazier, tune in next week for our special on Roe, Roe, Roe, You’re Out!

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPodCentral Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpodcastcentral/ Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpodcastcentral Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod Washington, D.C. is now a border town. Texas Governor Abbott has sent six buses of illegal immigrants to the capitol. Kamala Harris responded by saying, “I find it really helpful, since I didn’t have time to visit the last time.” It’s that Texas chivalry. You asked for an open door policy and he’s holding the door open for you, Kamala. The President of the Texas International Produce Association said this is destroying “the reputation of Texas.” He must have just mean Austin. Destroying the reputation of Texas… Now finish the sentence. C’mon. Finish it. It’s destroying the reputation of Texas… with liberals. So, it’s a complete success. Did you see the Vanity Fair article on Governor Abbott? They don’t like him. First of all, a magazine called Vanity Fair is not going to be the epitome of investigative journalism searching for nothing but the facts. I went to the Vanity Fair. The hall of mirrors was very fun. All the mirrors are equipped with Instagram filters. Does anyone believe Vanity Fair is churning out real journalism? Yeah, some do. The Marxist side of the Democratic Party, and leftists, and Democrats just to the right of the Marxist side of the Democratic Party. So, yeah, some do. I think it’s unfair to say that President Biden’s border policies are a failure, since he’d actually have to have a border policy in place to fail. Many fail to distinguish between anti-illegal immigration and anti-immigration. We can solve this problem by using the common core math. The antis cancel each other out and immigrations cancel each other out. All that we’re left with is illegal. Now, that’s either stupid or willfully ignorant or promoted by our public schools. Since Biden took office, Texas has “seized over 298 million lethal doses of fentanyl throughout the state.” Not all of it have been disposed of, but Hunter Biden is just one man. The governor’s legal authority to transport busloads of migrants to the U.S. Capitol remains in question. But until that question’s answered—he’s doing it. And they volunteer to go. Of course, those buses are also hauling all that fentanyl out of the state. Those French love their drugs. “Viva la Fentanyl!” Biden is hoping that the war in the Ukraine will make gas prices too high to actually use the buses. But the big news of the week: President Joe Biden was censured by the Easter Bunny. Rumors are that Jesus isn’t too happy with him either. While Biden was talking to the press, the Easter Bunny jumped in front of him and directed him away from the questions. But if the administration was honest, we all know that the questions aren’t the issue. It’s that Biden was answering them. This the authoritarian Easter Bunny would not allow. So the DNC has revised the generic proverb, “Think for yourself,” to “Think for yourself… unless the Easter Bunny tells you not to.” At least now we know who they is when Biden says things like, “I’d like to stay but they say I have to go…” They is the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, Punxsutawney Phil (otherwise known as the Ground Hog), Jack Frost and the Sandman. (I left Santa off the list, because Santa is real.) The GOP has accused the Easter Bunny of concealing eggs. But he’s not concerned, because Biden pardons the turkey every year. It’s troubling enough that a holiday mascot bossed around the leader of the free world. But what’s more troubling is that he obeyed the bunny. It could be worse, he could still be taking orders from Fauci. It’s no wonder the Easter Bunny and Joe Biden are such good friends. They’re both really good at hiding things. I didn’t even know the Easter Bunny was part of his cabinet. What other holiday figures are part of his cabinet? The Ground Hog comes out and sees his shadow and the mask mandate is extended for six more weeks. Airlines have lifted the mask mandate and the people rejoiced. Well, most of them, except for a few cult members. This Tweet from Mark Joseph Stern (typer for Slate magazine): “Who should decide whether passengers must wear masks? A federal agency staffed with experts accountable to the president who is accountable to the people? Or a 35-year-old Trump judge in Tampa?” It’s a rhetorical question, right? The Trump judge. Clearly, this Stern fellow has a lot of faith that this is how the government actually functions—accountability. Here I thought it was the job of a free press to keep politicians accountable? But they’ve become propaganda arms of the DNC. Stern, put on your mask, stay inside and don’t come out until the Easter Bunny tells you to.

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPod... Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpo... Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpo... Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod Twitter is in trouble. It’s nice to begin with good news, isn’t it? Elon Musk, the billionaire, not the men’s cologne, is buying up Twitter stock by the boat load. Yet, he has refused to join the board of directors, because… he didn’t become a billionaire to hang out at the nerd table… Or maybe it’s not that they’re nerds, but that they’re insane. Who wants to mingle with the insane? You know, unless you’re a psychiatrist and they’re heavily medicated. Or is that Twitter’s problem—they’re heavily medicated. First, let’s look at former CEO Jack Dorsey’s record of free speech abuse — doesn’t he look like a hip worship leader? Someone formerly on staff at Mars Hill. “Jack Dorsey just released a new praise album.” That’s why Twitter’s symbol is the Dove… if you squint just right. That’s the name of his solo album Tainted Dove. Anyway, let’s look at Dorsey’s record of free speech abuse, then we’ll turn to his 12-year old successor. Jack censored the breaking story on the Hunter Biden laptop, a story that turns out was true after all. But since big tech protected Biden, now we all have “yeah, I did that” stickers on our gas pumps. Then Dorsey banned President Trump from Twitter, but it was too late. He still beat Hillary. He banned the President of the United States. Let that be a lesson for Elon Musk! Then Dorcey’s successor, Parag Agrawal — he sounds made up — Agrawal — because Seri and Alexa were already taken — he famously said, “Where our role is particularly emphasized is who can be heard.” Let me translate: “We can censor people." Oh, but there’s more. He went on, “And so increasingly our role is moving towards how we recommend content … how we direct people’s attention.” Don’t use so many words, Parag. You only need one word to say all that — indoctrination. During Parag’s first day on the job, he banned the posting of videos or photos taken of people without their consent. “Mr. Floyd, may I post this. I can’t quite hear what you’re saying? Was that a yes? Just blink your eyes twice if I can post this.” George Floyd is just lucky Parag came later or we may have never heard of him. So, you’re telling me all those women on Hunter Biden’s laptop consented. “I paid for all those with the Big Guy’s money!” You could post photos of Biden and not get his consent, but you’re not gonna get his denial either. You think Corn Pop consented to that story being told? Acknowledging that Musk is their largest shareholder, Parag then said, “There will be distractions ahead, but our goals and priorities remain unchanged.” Hey, Twitter, your goals and priorities are the problem! It was reported, “Elon joining Twitter’s board was contingent on him agreeing not to buy more than 15% of Twitter. Now he’s not joining the board.” You see, folks, there is a price to free speech. And Elon Musk has the money to buy it. Can they ban a board member’s tweets? Things you can’t tweet on Twitter: “Boys are not girls.” Which explains why Elon didn’t want to be on Twitter’s board. It’s insane that tweeting reality will get you banned from their alternative universe. “Stop the steal.” Unless you’re Hillary Clinton, then your tweet about having the election stolen from you is on some kind of loop, which is unfortunate for the lumber industry’s new slogan: “Stop the steal.” Did you see this headline? Britain’s First Gay Muslim Politician Found Guilty of Sexual Assault on Teen Boy. Yeah, he was immediately offered a job at Disney. We can only hope Elon Musk’s next purchase will be the big mouse.

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPod... Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpo... Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpo... Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls—welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic, episode 10 of Season 2. I’m your host and Gender Specific Mouseketeer, Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. Remember the good ole days when you didn’t have to prescreen a Disney movie for your kids? Thanks, Disney. Now every time my kids want to watch a stupid Disney movie, I have to do homework because I’m not ready to discuss transgender unicorns with my four-year old. You know what’s ironic about the LGBTQIA — that’s right — they’ve added IA, which I believe stands for Intelligence Artificial. Anyway, what’s ironic about the LGBTQIA Disney Plus community? They’re evangelical. They treat their agenda like it’s the gospel. They want your children to believe. So, when I hear Disney executives talk about their transgender and pansexual children, I wonder… I just wonder… does it have anything to do with the parents’ political beliefs? Because I’m guessing, these aren’t right of center Republicans. And if they are—they’re really bad Republicans. RBRs. No child decides he’s transgender or pansexual without an able parent to confuse him. Disney Executive Producer Latoya Raveneau said that the leadership has been “so welcoming to my not-at-all-secret gay agenda.” Yeah, it’s hard to have a secret gay agenda when your video is leaked. And leaked is exactly the right word, because Disney’s message to parents seems to be—“Piss on you.” (I know it’s an offensive word. I considered using the word tinkle because it sounds more Christian, but I’m afraid the situation called for that particular word. Forgive me if I triggered you or if you have to go to the bathroom now.) Then Raveneau said that wherever she could, she added queerness to kid’s programming. Yeah, there have been some changes—Huey, Dewey and Ambrosia. It makes everything suspect. Winnie the Pooh and Tiger too. What’s that mean now? Please, just leave the classics alone. I don’t want Disney to reimagine Peter Pansexual. No wonder he wasn’t interested in Wendy… and just wanted to stay with the boys. There’s one Disney character who is simply named “The Evil Queen.” They’ve changed that to “Angry Gay Man.” Another Disney executive wants 50% of all Disney characters to be LGBTQIA. If she gets hold of the Infinity Gauntlet and snaps her fingers, you may suddenly find yourself with a butterfly tattoo while writing a fitness blog and using words like “intersectionality.” I do feel horrible that I’ve been misgendering these cartoon characters all these years. I thought Donald Duck was a duck. I thought Pluto was a dog. I thought Mickey was a mouse. Turns out Donald identifies as a cat. Goofy is non-binary and Mickey is Minnie. No wonder I didn’t get Disney cartoons! The question remains, “What is Goofy?” Just be careful to never say, “That kid is goofy.” And where are Donald’s pants? That’s probably why he hasn’t been in any live action movies. Tiger used to brag that the wonderful thing about being a Tiger is that he’s the only one. That’s not inclusive. Thanks to the activism of the other animals, Tiger has been banned from the Hundred Acre Woods. For years and years, narrow-minded religious people have been asking, “How come there’s no dad in Kanga and Roo's life?” Now narrow-minded progressives are asking, “Where’s the other mommy?” Look forward to new seven dwarfs: Dopey, Doc, Sneezy, Happy, Grumpy, Sleepy and Drag Queeny. (No one’s Bashful anymore.) Cinderella’s happy about it all. She’s switching to glass Birkenstocks. Just a little more comfortable. When you rub Aladdin’s Lamp you get three wishes, one for each gender. But that doesn’t even work because there are like sixty-five. Now everyone is just waiting for someone charming to rescue them. Be careful if you kiss a frog, because you don’t know what you’re gonna get. New things in Tomorrowland: non-gender specific space suits. Wait. Haven’t space suits always been non-gender specific? Except for the original Lost in Space where the suits hugged the mom and teenage daughters. When a space suit drives you wild, you know they’re not following the science. When I was a kid, there was a stage version of Peter Pan and Pan was played by an actress (Mary Martin). Then the gymnast Cathy Rigby played Peter Pan. Turns out Peter Pan was on hormone blockers. Now I know why they stopped selling raccoon hats—because they didn’t look good on boys or a girls. Disney wants to sexualize your kindergartner, because, you know… they’re trying to undue the damage of racist cartoons like The Jungle Book. Now, if that doesn’t make sense, I know, right? The problem with classic Disney films is that they support classic family values. In other words, they conserve the values, pass them on, celebrate them. Yeah, conserve is the root of conservative. Now you see the problem? Pinocchio no longer wants to be a real boy. He wants to be on the girl’s swim team. “I’d be great. You know wood floats.” His first sponsor is Tampon. “I got no strings on me.” They’re reimagining Dumbo as a documentary of the Republican Party. Could they even make The Swiss Family Robinson today? I mean, the family knelt and prayed in that movie. There are movies Disney is embarrassed to allow to be seen today, so they’re just reimagining them. Pollyamourous Anna. Not to be outdone, Universal Pictures announced that it will be implementing an LGBTQIA update as well. Upcoming films include Queen Kong, Drag-ula, My Two Mummies and The Invisible Ma’am. In Disney’s new Freaky Friday, the dad and his daughter switch bodies and finally everyone is happy. “LGBTQI and now they’ve added A. LGBTQI and now they’ve added A. Mickey Mouse. Minnie Mouse? Mickey Mouse. Minnie Mouse? Don’t you dare misgender Mickey Mouse. Mouse, boy, girl? Who’s to say what a woman is, you cannot know. Who’s to say what a woman is, you cannot know.” That’s our program for today, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls. I want to thank our director, Jefferson Drexler, our executive producer, Joel Fieri, our social media master, Danny Avila, and my cowriter Ron McGehee. I’d also like to thank Ron Bass for our new intro graphics. If you liked this episode, but sure to click like, because there is no “loved it” button. Even if you only found it mildly amusing, click like, because we might be funnier in the future. If you want to fight the rising tide of wokeness in this country, click like to join a truly peaceful protest. And please subscribe, because that’s the most meaningful vote of all. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com I’m Thor Ramsey and I hope you’re less woke America. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com And be sure to subscribe to CPC’s YouTube Channel as well!

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPod... Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpo... Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpo... Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod It Could Be Worse Welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic, episode 9 of Season 2. I’m your host and Woman of Year Runner Up Depending Upon the Context, Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. Is two plus two four? I can’t say. I’m not a mathematician. As many of you know, Supreme Court Nominee Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson was sneakily asked, “Can you define the word woman?” Now, that’s a tricky question, because in order to define a woman you have to know what the word define means. Can you define a woman is the wrong question. Better questions are, “Do you have breasts that produce milk? Were you born with a uterus and ovaries? Can you pop another human out of your body? Are you two feet shorter than the ‘woman’ who beat you in a swimming meet?” Those are the right questions. And if you can answer yes to any of those questions, what does it mean? It means you are in pain because you’ve been cursed by God for blaming what you did on someone else and now you have to have babies. No wonder she was afraid to answer. To help answer the question, “What is a woman?” Let’s follow the science, looking to the Public Health Commission to give us some insight into… [photo of Rachel Lavine] Okay, we’re gonna move on. If appointed to the Supreme Court, Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson would be the first black… what? We don’t want to say, because, you know, who’s to say. What I can say is that Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson will be the first black undefined entity to that revered office. The really troubling thing about Judge Brown’s answer to the question was that she said she couldn’t answer because she wasn’t a biologist. Now, my mom and dad told me from a young age that I was a boy. How can I trust their assessment now? They weren’t biologists. They must have just been guessing. Now it’s too late. I’d feel too awkward going to a biologist at this age and asking him if I’m a boy or a girl. Maybe that’s why the Boy Scouts of America changed their requirements, because they’re not biologists. They can start fires and put up a tent, but don’t ask them to direct you to the nearest restroom of your gender. Here’s the thing, though. If this confirmation process is a charade as so many say and she’s confirmed regardless—then why not just answer the freaking question? She claims not to have a judicial philosophy! How do you function as a judge without a judicial philosophy? Oh, wait! I know. She carries her Dungeon and Dragons dice wherever she goes. How can she judge Roe v. Wade? She’s not a doctor. When does life begin? She’s the Lord. USA Today said that even science says there’s no easy answer to the question, “What is a woman?” Hey, when did science become a moron? Regarding the NCAA swimmer known as Leah Thompson, a professor at Wheaton College said: “Lots of people are assigned male at birth, have higher testosterone levels ... and could never make a Division I swimming team. Why do we attribute her current success to her assigned sex, rather than to her long record as an elite swimmer?” Uh, because of her testicles? I thought Wheaton was the Harvard of the evangelical movement? I’d run the other way, Christians… as far away from Wheaton as you can get. And if you have testicles, you’ll run faster. Even Katlyn Jenner said she doesn’t think it’s fair for transgender athletes to compete in women’s sports. Yeah, I said she. When you say something sane, I’m gonna respect your pronouns. Judge Brown Jackson said she couldn’t define woman in that context. To illustrate her point, let’s define my gender contextually. I happen to be a heterosexual man. How do I know this? Because in my pocket I have a list of things my wife gave me to do. Katanji Brown Jackson will be the first black woman nominated to the Supreme Court. It’s a shame she can’t enjoy the honor of her nomination, since she doesn’t know what a woman is. Judges have to make judgments based upon the law, not upon their utopian woke ideology. Can you imagine a lawyer stating his case, “He stabbed her in broad daylight.” “Did you say broad daylight? Are you trying to gender the daylight?” What if she had been asked, “How would you define a man?” “Toxic!” That response would not create a backlash on Twitter. I will say this. It could have been a lot worse—Biden could have nominated someone that we would take seriously. Now, let me just state frankly, that I can make all these jokes about Ketanji Brown Jackson because she does not have a medical condition. She chose that former cast member of The Facts of Life look all by herself. Oh, crap, I gotta go. Here comes Will Smith. How many women is this guy married to? Well, they do have an open marriage. Did you see Will Smith slap Chris Rock at the Oscars? I’m still trying to finish up my diagram that proves white males are to be blamed. I can understand Will Smith’s reaction to Chris Rock’s insensitive joke, because Jada does have a medical condition called alopecia that causes hair loss. However, I can’t help feeling that slap was for all the guys he hasn’t been able to slap in his open marriage. Let’s just hope he can define woman. Or maybe it was as simple as this. If you watch the footage right before the slap, Will Smith was laughing it off, but Jada was not happy. So, Will Smith knew if he didn’t want to be “Pimp Slapped” later, Chris Rock had to “Pimp Slapped” now! I will say this. It could have been a lot worse for Chris Rock—he could have been a white guy. That’s our program for today. I want to thank our director, Jefferson Drexler, our executive producer, Joel Fieri, our social media master, Danny Avila, and my cowriter Ron McGehee. I’d also like to thank Ron Bass for our new intro graphics. If you liked this episode, but sure to click like, because there is no “loved it” button. Even if you only found it mildly amusing, click like, because we might be funnier in the future. If you want to fight the rising tide of wokeness in this country, click like to join a truly peaceful protest. And please subscribe, because that’s the most meaningful vote of all. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com I’m Thor Ramsey and I hope you’re less woke America. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com

Post: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/the-protest-show-with-thor-ramsey-the-vaccinated-vs-the-unvaccinated/ I’m not against the vaccination. I’m just against Draconian measures to get people vaccinated like firing them from their jobs if they don’t or requiring vaccination IDs to get into a descent restaurant or removing the first born child from their homes. Oh, that’s only Australia? Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPod... Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpo... Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpo... Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod The Vaccinated vs. The Unvaccinated Welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic, episode 6 of Season 2. I’m your host and deep voice tutor (I gave lessons to Elizabeth Holmes), Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. Personally, I’m not against the vaccination. I’m just against Draconian measures to get people vaccinated like firing them from their jobs if they don’t or requiring vaccination IDs to get into a descent restaurant or removing the first born child from their homes. Oh, that’s only Australia? Okay. Speaking of Australia, things are getting out of hand in Italy where a man tried to get the vaccination with a fake arm. True story. He nearly got away with it, until the nurse noticed the fake mannequin head next to the fake arm. But that wasn’t the real giveaway. At that point the nurse just asked what personal pronoun the mannequin head preferred: “It or they?” The giveaway was that she couldn’t find a vein in the fake arm. Or in the fake neck of the head for that matter. Still, you have to admire the attempt. For years now in the state of New York, in a court of law people could swear to tell the truth by holding up a fake arm. I was at Starbucks the other day and they wanted to kick me out because I didn’t have a vaccination passport, but then I just told them I was homeless and they left me alone. Well, after they handed me a needle. Did you get vaccinated because you were afraid of COVID? Or because you were afraid of losing your job? So, here’s what I’m hearing on the street, if by street you mean a dystopian digital world called Twitter. In a free society, you are free not to get vaccinated and your employer is free to fire you for not getting vaccinated. Remember, that’s called freedom. Not coercion. Coercion would be if I punished you for not taking the action I demanded you take, like if I wanted you to get the jab but you refused to get the jab for your own reasons and then I fired you for not getting the jab for my reasons. Wait a second. I think I’m confusing freedom and coercion, but that often happens to married people. Well, in any case, the good news is (thanks to California laws) employees can rebut their employer by organizing a smash and grab… and not serve a day in jail. That’s true freedom. On the other hand, you can always get outed as a religious zealot when you come waltzing in with that religious exemption form. What would Jesus do? He’d be healing a line of people with Covid. Have you never read the New Testament? Last month I was in Nebraska at the Audubon Society hotel. Well, where do you go for vacation? Anyway, I stepped into an empty elevator. The door was about to close when I noticed an elderly couple approaching, so I held the door for them. And the elderly woman stopped for a moment before entering and said, “Are you vaccinated?” I said, “No. Are you?” She said, “Yes.” Then I asked, “Then why are you afraid to get on an elevator with me?” Then she said, “Bye. I cannot reason about the subject. I can only follow the narrative.” What kind of lame vaccination is this? Well, let’s get this update from the CDC as reinterpreted by Professor Todd Zywicki of George Mason University and punched up by The Protest Show staff of writers. Here are Rochelle Walensky’s (no relation to the Matrix directors) new talking points as briefed by me, her personal assistant. She’s the director of the CDC by the way, which stands for Center for Disease Control and clearly needs to be renamed because they ain’t controlling nothing. “For the last year we’ve been telling you that getting vaccinated will prevent you from getting infected and transmitting Covid. Turns out—we were wrong. Vaccination reduces your chances of getting Covid, but not your chances of giving it. All we’re saying now is—stay home because you’re not sick. Because you might get others sick even though you’re not sick yourself. We just feel sick about this. Now, if you find this confusing, just you wait.” “Scratch everything I just said. Turns out with Omicron you are actually more likely to contract and transmit Covid. But trust us, we are certain that even though getting vaxxed will make you more likely to contract and transmit Covid than someone who is unvaxxed, we know it will protect you from serious illness, because we say so. Serious illness knows we ain’t messin’ around, baby. We are certain the vaccination is safe in both the short term and long term. So get your booster! And don’t ride elevators with the unvaxxed, because you could give them Covid and they could die.” “Oh, wait! Scratch that ! Turns out you are really only at risk of serious illness and death from Covid if you are older and unhealthy with multiple serious co-morbidities, a word I didn’t even know the meaning of until a month ago because, you know—healthy. Now the risks of some serious side effects, such as myocarditis in young men, are actually higher. But thanks to record inflation, you young guys don’t have jobs anyway, so there’s no risk of losing it if you refuse the vaccination. But even though the vaccination increases your risk of contracting Omicron, is unnecessary for those who are young and low risk, is unquestionably harmful to everyone with natural immunity especially against Omicron, and side-effects are higher than we thought, trust us. Get vaxxed and boosted. Otherwise, you won’t be able to order cheese sticks in person. “And don’t think we’re flip-flopping here. The only reason we told you not to wear masks initially is because we wanted to make sure all the important people had masks first.” “Oh, by the way, did we mention that boosters are far less effective than initial vaccination, have cumulative risks of adverse effects, and wane by 10 weeks? Why would we mention that? Why be a downer? I’m up for some good news these days, aren’t you?” Okay, Rochelle, now take that message and sell it to the public. Yeah, all of it. What? Maybe you need more media training to sell that message. Just take a note from a pro, Elizabeth Holmes, and speak with a low voice. That lets people know they should take you seriously. That’s our show for today. I want to thank our director, Jefferson Drexler, who speaks in falsetto during business meetings, our executive producer, Joel Fieri, our social media master, Danny Avila, and my cowriter Ron McGehee. I’d also like to thank Ron Bass for our new intro graphics. If you liked this episode, then clearly, you’ve had media training, so click like, because where else can you find this kind of quality . . . besides all over the internet? If you want to fight the rising tide of wokeness in this country, please subscribe, because unlike the mainstream media, our news is funny on purpose. I’m Thor Ramsey and I hope you’re less woke America. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com And be sure to subscribe to CPC’s YouTube Channel as well!

Welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic, episode 5 of Season 2. I’m your host and Domestic Cuddly-Fluff, Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. Today, I’m pretending that we have a live-studio audience who have been up all night celebrating their lack of participation in the events of January 6th, a day that will live on in the infancy of Kamala Harris’s mind. All that to say, one take is all I get and if I flub, well, another jokes bites the dust. And now, our first joke on the teleprompter. Hey, stay with me, people! It’s not my fault you were up all night celebrating. Former Vice President Dick Cheney visited the House of Representatives with his daughter Liz on January 6th where they observed a moment of silence for Joy Reid’s career. Our main subject today: How To Tell the Difference Between a Group of Idiots and a Coup. In countries where coup’s actually happen, the insurrectionists don’t stop and take selfies. “This war was won on Instagram!” You can tell it’s a group of idiots rather than true insurrectionists if before storming the Capital they share a joint. It was disgraceful and many deserve to be prosecuted, but it wasn’t exactly Pearl Harbor. Shoot, I remember a fight in Junior High that had more action. Yet, CNN described it as 1,000 times worse than 9/11. This same reporter has also said a pimple on the end of your nose is 1,000 worse than cancer. I should put it in context, though. That pimple did appear the night of prom. Real insurrectionists don’t have their mom drop them off. If a mob hunts down politicians in a real insurrection, they catch them. And soon there are bodies hanging from the overpass. The only thing hanging from the overpass on January 6 was Nancy Pelosi’s expression. Because of botox, she can’t look shocked naturally, thus the eyebrows. Real insurrectionists don’t eat hamburgers that are plant-based alternatives, because real insurrectionists have you for lunch. A group of idiots says, “We’re committing a coup. And I hope it’s made by Ford, because Ford coups are American made.” That’s our program for today. I want to thank our director, Jefferson Drexler, our executive producer, Joel Fieri, our social media master, Danny Avila, and my co-writer Ron McGehee. I’d also like to thank Ron Bass for our new intro graphics. If you liked this episode, but sure to click like, because there is no “loved it” button. Even if you only found it mildly amusing, click like, because we might be funnier in the future. If you want to fight the rising tide of wokeness in this country, click like because at least we’re trying. And please subscribe, because that’s the most meaningful vote of all. I’m Thor Ramsey and I hope you’re less woke, America. For more episodes, visit ChristianPodcastCentral.com And be sure to subscribe to CPC’s YouTube Channel as well!

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPodCentral Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpodcastcentral/ Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpodcastcentral Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod Welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic!. I’m your host and Spell Check Fact Checker, Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. As you can see from our set, season 2 of The Protest Show has been upgraded, thanks in large part to our new sponsor. Today’s show is NOT sponsored by Chevrolet. What’s odd about sponsorship is that if Chevrolet paid me to say that, there wouldn’t be a problem. But if I say it for free, they can sue me. (Maybe they got it mixed up, because I know in AA you’re not supposed to talk about your sponsor. At least that’s what it said on Hunter’s laptop.) And here I thought “word of mouth” was the best advertisement, not that I would ever buy a Chevrolet, which is why they’re only our fake sponsor. It all makes sponsorship very confusing. I guess some companies feel they have so much clout that they only want to associate with programs that have deep pockets, which is to say 99 percent of the products in your local grocery store would sue me if I mentioned them. But this set is an upgrade. Thanks to all the work I lost during the COVID crisis, both of our cars were repossessed, so now I can use the entire garage for the show instead of just part of it. At least I think they were repossessed. They could have just been stolen. Either way, the guy was wearing a mask. Today’s program is actually sponsored by The Life Size Cardboard Cutout of Kyle Rittenhouse. Simply place it in your window for home protection. “Is your house a Rittenhouse?” Now, for our first official segment of season two. You may have seen this story last year (probably not if you watch CNN, MSNBC, PBS or any of the other lame stream media), but it’s completely true. (Yeah, it’s a satirical news program, except for this part.) Kamala Harris hired a lookalike to attend an event in her place. That’s right. She hired someone to impersonate her. Now we know why they’ve kept the mask mandates in place? She shamefully appropriated the Ninja culture. Ninjas everywhere are outraged. You hear that? [Nothing.] That’s the sound of a peaceful protest. It was obvious the impersonator wasn’t Kamala, because she didn’t cackle every 30 seconds. And she slipped up when she said she had been to the border. Or was it a lookalike? What we discovered about Kamala’s motives for having a body double is that it wasn’t about fear of safety, it was about fear of judgment. She found someone who looked better in her outfits. She was battling body shaming with body shamming. The bad news is that Joe Biden also has a lookalike, but he’s been polling higher than President One-hundred-and-Eighty-million-wink-wink. Our crack team of investigative journalists (though we’re trying to get them help for their addiction) has uncovered why the body double is polling higher than the actual Biden. And here are the reasons… Why Joe Biden’s Body Double is Polling Higher Than He Is He’s someone other than Joe Biden. I mean, if we’re going to have a fake president, then let’s have a fake president. Whenever you see an interview with Biden and he’s speaking clear and coherently—that’s the double. A lot of noteworthy individuals have used lookalikes—Fidel Castro, Kim Jong-un and Queen Amidala from the Star Wars prequels. And lest we forget, Jan Brady did in one of Brady Bunch episodes. Why Joe Biden’s Body Double is Polling Higher Than He Is: Even Jill couldn’t tell the difference. And she’s a doctor. But to be fair, he was asleep during the colonoscopy. If our president’s going to fake it, then we need a better actor. So, a body double only makes sense. Besides, a fake president works better with fake news. Other reasons the lookalike is polling higher: His daughter didn’t lose her diary. And his son doesn’t even own a laptop. He can walk up an entire flight of stairs without falling. When he pulls his hair back, he doesn’t have horns. He lives in the East Wing, which is where all the Biden administration policies are coming from. If you liked this episode, but sure to click like, because there is no “loved it” button. Even if you only found it mildly amusing, click like, because we might be funnier in the future. If you want to fight the rising tide of wokeness in this country, click like to join a truly peaceful protest. And please subscribe, because that’s the most meaningful vote of all. I’m Thor Ramsey and I hope you’re less woke America.

Website: https://christianpodcastcentral.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChristianPod... Twitter: https://twitter.com/christianpodcen Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/christianpo... Parler: https://parler.com/#/user/christianpo... Gab: https://gab.com/christianpodcastcentral Rumble: https://rumble.com/user/ChristianPodcast Gettr: https://gettr.com/user/christianpod Welcome to the Idiocracy—Banana Joe’s Republic, episode 4 of Season 2. I’m your host and hoax crime strategist, Thor Ramsey, fighting the rising tide of wokeness one joke at a time. Today’s topic, along with some bonus Kamala Harris jokes, is… Reasons We Believe Jussie Smollett’s Attack Wasn’t a Hoax In his own testimony, Smollett said he didn’t notice the noose around his neck until later. He thought the noose around his neck might have been a gift… or possibly foreplay of some kind. It could have been a message, like, “I want to tie the knot…” Or “Do you want to hang with me?” Remember, the brothers accused of attacking him were Nigerian, which really isn’t the issue. They were bodybuilders, so English of speaking was not the language of which they spoke in tongue well like me. Another reason I believe Jussie Smollett’s attack wasn’t a hoax: Because I love Subway too and I’d brave subzero temperatures for a meatball footlong. Even if I was rich and famous. Besides, Jared’s a pedophile, so you can imagine that lots of people want to beat up people who are seen with a Subway sandwich in their hands. Along with Smollett, we believe the two brothers are lying because they both told him, “We can keep a secret.” Jussie worked out with the two brothers. We think the brothers were there as dedicated trainers who were just trying to knock an unauthorized sandwich out of Jussie’s hands. Better a swollen eye than a swollen belly. Besides, this is a plot stolen from The Pink Panther films with Peter Sellers that no one watches anymore, so Jussie wouldn’t even know to copy such a thing. Remember, Jussie’s an actor. You have to give him his lines. He’s not a writer. “Line?” “This is MAGA country?” It’s Chicago! Even a bad writer wouldn’t expect us to believe someone would say that, which is why it must be true. And if he really wanted to pull off a hoax in front of security cameras, why would he hire two black men? I’ll tell you why. For far too many years, redneck white men have been played by white men only. That practice is so discriminatory. If Jussie did stage this, then all I have to say is that his heart was in the right place. “If only that camera was working. That song and dance number would have blown everyone away. Ten months of rehearsal down the drain.” Hey, the Sharks and Jets dance when they fight. Even if Jussie was faking it, that’s what actors do—they fake it. For a living. I think he should be commended for really committing to his craft even while under oath. Besides, this case shows how much progress we’ve made in America, when you’re so privileged that you have to hire a couple of guys to be racists. But I don’t think Jussie’s that unoriginal—to pull a page directly out of the Democratic playbook and stage a white supremacy incident. Disappointingly, he was found guilty on 5 of 6 counts. The count he wasn’t found guilty on was shooting the cinematographer. Further investigation has revealed that right before Alec Baldwin’s handgun fired on it’s own, it yelled, “This is MAGA country!” (This will no doubt be the most obvious joke on the subject.)