Hello, I'm a Scientist 9: Noah's Flood, Canyons, and Comets

It certainly does create a strong feeling of trust when someone says "Hello, I'm a scientist". This is why we should automatically believe everything "Chemist"/"Scientist"/"Professor"/Auto Mechanic John Morris Pendleton says. This time, he makes a thoroughly convincing and honest case to prove that the Grand Canyon was carved in a week by the flood...no wait, a spilled lake...no wait, the flood. And also that anything can be explained away by dropping mud on it.

I said 3.6 when I meant 3.36 :( Woe!
Also, passing through the firmament (which John thinks started the flood) would affect the object. Probably it would slow it down slightly and not much else, although I'll leave those calculations to you.

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I woke up in the puppets' meeting room in "The Final Showdown" after being kidnapped. How? Why? Ehh, I'm tired, don't feel like explaining.

Salton Trough Geology (Original Colorado River Delta):
http://fire.biol.wwu.edu/trent/alles/GeologySaltonTrough.pdf

Desert Varnish:
Maximum thickness:
http://geology.gsapubs.org/content/28/2/183.abstract

http://crev.info/2013/02/desert-varnish-growth/

Faster growth rate:
http://geology.gsapubs.org/content/41/2/263.abstract

"Polystrate" trees "through" coal:
http://books.google.ca/books?id=6_pLAAAAMAAJ&lpg=PA182&ots=usngueOMMK&dq=acadian%20geology%20%22modern%20marshes%20of%20the%20bay%20of%20fundy%22%20john%20william%20dawson&pg=PA190#v=onepage&q=acadian%20geology%20%22modern%20marshes%20of%20the%20bay%20of%20fundy%22%20john%20william%20dawson&f=false

"Polystrate" whale in diatomite:
http://www.talkorigins.org/faqs/polystrate/whale.html

Impact Calculator:
http://impact.ese.ic.ac.uk/ImpactEffects/

Details:
http://impact.ese.ic.ac.uk/ImpactEffects/effects.pdf

Information on minimum impact velocity:
http://www.lpi.usra.edu/publications/books/CB-954/chapter2.pdf

Original Video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bPtBBNJySSk

Intro Music: Dagon - Cut To The Heart
Lava Music: Bloodbath - Hades Rising
Outro: N/A - Removed due to copyright claim
...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCrXxJf7Ydg