Trust Your Instincts (Reddit Scary Story)

Top Reddit Stories: Trust Your Instincts

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About 1 - 2 years ago, I was dating a musician in the area. Apparently we had mutual friends and he gave lessons at a Guitar Center in the city where I took lessons. I had seen him there, but I didn't know we had connections at the time. It took me a while, but I realized we knew all the same people. He was about 10 years older than me. I will try to recount/summarize this as best as I can.

Once, I went to see a friend's band play at a local bar. I walked in, and he was by himself drinking at the bar. I remember walking in the place, and him snapping his head around and looking at me. That moment truly captured his deepest state of mind - a restless, down-on-his luck, searching-for-the-answer kind of energy. I don't know how else to describe it, but I could tell right away in that brief moment, this guy was off.

I did not want to interact with him really, I was just there to relax and feel the music and hang out with the band after, but I had recently learned this guy knew the band/used to play with them, so I felt obligated to interact with him. We chatted and drank a or two. By the end of the night he suggests we hang out again/see more music sometime.

I continued to hang out with this guy, always meeting up to go out to a bar after work. He seemed cool, confident, and he had recently moved to America in the last few years, so it was captivating to interact with someone who had cultural differences. After a few weeks of hanging out consistently, he revealed that he had gotten out of relationship with a girl who he thought he would marry, but that she had BPD and drug issues. He later revealed that after they broke it off, she crazily accused him of domestic . Apparently she asked him to come over to her apartment and talk, they argued, he claims he didn't touch her and left, she called the police two weeks later and filed a report, and they went to court over it. He told me they didn't have enough evidence to charge him, but he took a deal where he would go to an assigned anger management class and do some community service and then they would exonerate him from any charges. Unfortunately I took his word that she was crazy and he was innocent, and decided that I would be the judge of his behavior around me from the present moment on.

We enjoyed the same hobbies, including music and riding motorcycles. We started going to Bike Nights and got to know a lot of the same people in the motorcycle circuit around the city. Our mutual friends seemed to like me being social, but when it came to me dating this guy, they either had a negative opinion of it, or didn't express opinion at all. "That guy doesn't have his together," they would say. Red flag # 2. I decided no one really has their "" together, and they probably didn't really know this guy that well anyway.

We dated for a little over a year. I end up moving in with him about 8 months into it. I feel worse and worse about myself as time goes on. He's controlling, he takes every moment he can to make extremely rude/sarcastic remarks. Always commenting on everything. I figure he's just insecure and will figure out soon enough that I'm no threat. He berates me for wanting any time on my own or for wanting to do anything that is meaningful to me. He expresses his admiration at my "success in life", but also shoots me down for just about every little thing I do or say. We argue more. I try to retaliate and hold my own, I try to prove myself to him and explain myself constantly, but it feels like it's no use. Nothing is ever good enough. I try to express this in words to him so I can see where I'm misunderstand so we can try to find resolution, but he just accuses me of being at fault. I know we are not compatible, but I can't quite figure out why. I just keep existing there. He continues to gaslight, belittle and control me emotionally and sexually. I continue to convince myself that this is what relationships are like.

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Source: https://exe.io/m1noFD