Am I Just Being Played? Or Is He Really That Dumb?

Jackie and her bf have been in a long distance relationship for about a year. Recently, things have been frustrating: he neglects to tell her when he goes to bars at night and when his kids’ mom comes over. When she mentions he should be more forthcoming with what’s going on with him, he tells her she’s expecting too much from him. Also, he recently got drunk, totaled his car, and spent the night in jail. But, at the same time, he says he loves her and wants to marry her. Jackie says, “He has a good heart and I know he means well but he’s dumb af and I can’t stand feeling this way. Am I asking too much? Demanding too much? I’d love to know if it is me so I can change my ways and become better.”

In my response to “Jackie’s” question, I explain why we SHOULDN’T be impressed when he/she claims to be in love with us too soon. I also speak to living together vs. getting married and what research shows about cohabitating before marriage. 💖💖💖 Rosenfeld, M., & Roesler, K. (2018). Cohabitation experience and cohabitation’s association with marital dissolution. Journal of Marriage and Family, 81(1).

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