God's Choice For Your Marriage

God's Choice For Your Marriage

My dear family, thank you for your prayers for my recovery, may our Lord reward you.  For those of you who have not yet found a helpmate in life, Jesus, help this message to sink deep into their hearts and give them the integrity to be true to it.  Amen

Well, as I have told you before in the last messages, I have been working with a young couple considering marriage.  Some behaviors have begun to surface in the woman, Barbara--behaviors that are not appropriate.

I have sought the Lord with tears for them night after night, by questioning them closely, together. What began to surface was dishonesty and manipulation.

We all have the tendency to tell people what they want to hear, to manipulate and sow alterations of the truth to make others look guilty, so I cannot point the finger.  I am not one whit more virtuous. My past, buried in the Sea of the Mercy of God, convicts me.  And were I not so in love with Jesus, I could be capable of much worse.

But for the sake of the future of those who are not yet married, I caution you: Please! Do not marry out of God's will. And do not have relations with a woman before you are married. It forms a bondage.

Jesus began, "My people, many of you have made your own choices in forging a union. It was not My choice, you did not seek Me and the enemy of your soul planned an ambush for you even as he did for Solomon, David's son. You chose for yourself the Amorite, Hittite and Jebusite women for your lives, when I had another in mind--one who would be faithful to Me and virtuous - and faithful to you. One who would bring you joy and not sorrow; one of virtue to strengthen and lead your children. But you chose as the world chooses and now you have lived in sorrow and separation all these years."

And the Lord had mentioned these names, so I took aside a moment and when I looked them up. And when I looked these names up, I came across an article that I want to do further research on before I pass it onto you...

But it was from a website called P E T R A 101 The Christian Warrior's Website. It seems to be a fairly new blog or website--I not too sure about. And I didn't really have time to go into depth to find out what they were all about or were Scriptural or not. But they did bring up some interesting points about the meaning of names. So, I'm going to share that with you.

The three tribes named by the Lord definitely bear a resemblance to the behavior and dynamics in this relationship.

Hittites, Sons of terror: torments, phobias, terror, depression, deceit.

Amorites, Mountain people: renowned; Obsession with earthly fame and glory, domineering. Jebusites, Threshers:  Suppression of spiritual authority in fellow believers, legalism.

As far as the veracity of this, I can't go any deeper to attest to it, but I can say there were definitely things going through my mind as I read these, 'cause these qualities seemed to line up with some of the things that were coming to the surface.

In Joshua 3:10 Joshua said, "Hereby ye shall know that the living God is among you, and that he will without fail drive out from before you the Canaanites, and the ....Hittites...and the Amorites, and the Jebusites."

And he mentioned several other tribes as well.

Jesus continued, "Please, let this be a reminder to you to wait on My choice, wait for the one I have anointed to be your spouse. One who is honest and full of integrity towards Me, not other gods, leading both you and your children astray.

"I have only your best interests in mind, My people, but many of you duck and dodge My warnings, because your flesh dominates your thinking. Your greatest protection from these errors is purity of heart, mind and body. When you are purified, you set standards that--if properly protected and maintained--will serve you for your entire lives.

"There are many choices you will refuse to make because you have chosen Purity as your standard. You will continually, in all areas of your lives, apply those standards before engaging anything of importance in your environment. Some overestimate their strength and open themselves to occasions of sin--and then it is too late. A bondage has already been formed.

"Notice I said, a 'bondage,' not a 'bond.' Men form bondages; I form bonds. As it is written, "Let no man separate what God has joined."

"But so many have joined themselves to what I did not choose for them and live in unhappy marriages, lessening their children's chances of happy marriages. And the sin gets passed from generation to generation, until one of them chooses to live in obedience to Me and waits for the right partner to marry.

"Consider, My people. Are you in a relationship that has caused you more grief than joy? Have you created a bondage to this person by not waiting to have sexual relations? Are you thinking, 'This is my last chance for happiness in marriage; I am getting too old?' Let me assure you, that is a lie from Satan, spoken over you to cause you to enter into a tragic relationship. It is never too late for you and the longer you wait, the greater your reward.

"Consider the virtuous widow, Ruth, who left her homeland to watch over her widowed mother-in-law in a foreign land with foreign customs and a God she did not know. Because of her kindness, she was hailed as being better than seven sons. In that day, a woman survived on the basis of the children left to her when her husband died-- especially the sons. They were her security for the future.

"At the same time, was I aware of the dreams of a man on in years, past the normal age for raising a young family. He was a virtuous man and lived for Me. I sent him the virtuous widow, Ruth, in his elder years to renew his youth and answer the desires of his heart for a righteous son."

This is the story. (And this is coming from the Book of Ruth, Chapter 3) 

One day Ruth's mother-in-law Naomi said to her, "My daughter, I must find a home for you, where you will be well provided for.

The background for this was that Naomi had given her sons into marriage to Ruth in a foreign, and I think it was two of her other sons were married to women, also. Locally. And the men were killed. And Ruth chose to stay on with Naomi, and to live with her and take care of her. And Naomi chose to return to her own people. And Ruth followed along with her. So, it was a beautiful relationship, a very close relationship between the virtuous woman Naomi and her daughter-in-law, Ruth.

1One day Ruth's mother-in-law Naomi said to her, "My daughter, I must find a home for you, where you will be well provided for. 2 Now Boaz, with whose women you have worked, is a relative of ours. Tonight he will be winnowing barley on the threshing floor. 3 Wash, put on perfume, and get dressed in your best clothes. Then go down to the threshing floor, but don't let him know you are there until he has finished eating and drinking. 4 When he lies down, note the place where he is lying. Then go and uncover his feet and lie down. He will tell you what to do."

Now, a little more background on this, when Ruth and Naomi arrived in this location, they didn't have anything to eat, they were very poor. So, Ruth went out in the field and gleaned behind the workers who were gathering in the harvest. Which was the tradition, when people were very poor they could go behind the harvesters and pick up what remained.

5 "I will do whatever you say," Ruth answered. 6 So she went down to the threshing floor and did everything her mother-in-law told her to do. 7 When Boaz had finished eating and drinking and was in good spirits, he went over to lie down at the far end of the grain pile. Ruth approached quietly, uncovered his feet and lay down. 8 In the middle of the night something startled the man; he turned--and there was a woman lying at his feet!

9 "Who are you?" he asked.

"I am your servant Ruth," she said. "Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a guardian-redeemer of our family."

10 "The Lord bless you, my daughter," he replied. "This kindness is greater than that which you showed earlier: You have not run after the younger men, whether rich or poor. 11 And now, my daughter, don't be afraid. I will do for you all you ask. All the people of my town know that you are a woman of noble character. 12 Although it is true that I am a guardian-redeemer of our family, there is another who is more closely related than I. 13 Stay here for the night, and in the morning if he wants to do his duty as your guardian-redeemer, good; let him redeem you. But if he is not willing, as surely as the Lord lives I will do it. Lie here until morning."

14 So she lay at his feet until morning, but got up before anyone could be recognized; and he said, "No one must know that a woman came to the threshing floor." 15 He also said, "Bring me the shawl you are wearing and hold it out." When she did so, he poured into it six measures of barley and placed the bundle on her. Then he went back to town."

And it was settled at the city gates that he would purchase her deceased husband's field and take Ruth as his wife, which was the custom.

13 So Boaz took Ruth and she became his wife. When he made love to her, the Lord enabled her to conceive, and she gave birth to a son. 14 The women said to Naomi: "Praise be to the Lord, who this day has not left you without a guardian-redeemer. May he become famous throughout Israel! 15 He will renew your life and sustain you in your old age. For your daughter-in-law, who loves you and who is better to you than seven sons, has given him birth."

Now, interestingly, in the genealogy of this child,

Boaz was the father of Obed, Obed was the father of Jesse, and Jesse was the father of David. That's the Book of Ruth, Chapters 3 & 4

The Lord continued, "Consider Hannah, the barren wife who for many years had not conceived a child. She waited and begged Me with tears and supplications, and gave birth to the great prophet Samuel. Anne and Joachim the mother of Mary, Elizabeth the mother of John the Baptist-- all were beyond childbearing years when I intervened for My glory. Because of their noble character, purity and persistence in prayer and works of charity they were chosen to be the mothers of My saints.

"Is My arm short that I cannot also bring you a holy spouse in My perfect timing? Is it?? Consider the God you serve. Consider: I made you with your own particular needs. Consider: I love you with an intensity you as a human cannot ever understand, and even before you were born I had in mind the perfect spouse for you.

"So, if you believe in Who I AM, believe also in My promises to you. 'It is not good for a man to be alone, I will provide him with a helpmate. She will be bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh. And thus I will bless them and multiply them in the land.'

"Do not marry out of fear that you will passed over because of your age; that is a lie from Satan. Do not fall into that trap."

Just so you know, that was a quote from Genesis.

Well, dear Heartdwellers, I must confess: I fell into this very same trap. I married at 33 before I knew the Lord, because no one had ever proposed to me and I had just given birth to his child--and I was getting old. I felt like it was my last chance to marry. And what a tragic mistake it turned out to be.

The right man did not come into my life until I was 45. Perhaps he would have come much sooner if I had not entered into a marriage out of God.

Please, don't do what I did. Wait for the right man or woman. You will find that that person is so deeply in love with who you are, that all other people fade away and have no importance to them. You will only have eyes for one another. You will grow in holiness together and your offspring will be holy. Please, take these words of the Lord to heart.

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