Stepping on Landmines of Presumption pt 1

3 years ago
27

Hello brothers and sisters and Heartdwellers Family. May you all be blessed

I love how the Lord continuous to use me as an example of such great weakness. This happens every time, he will forewarn me of a test coming and guys I fail every single time. Many times, I am so frustrated with myself and I then tell the Lord, is everyone like this? I bet there are other brides of yours who actually adhere to your council and walk cautiously, after a warning, but nope I don’t. Lord have mercy.

I am truly an instrument of God’s mercy guys, if there is hope for me, don’t you see there is hope for you. He has made it known to me, he allows me to fail over and over again not only to humble me, but for me to hope and have confident trust in his mercy. So that I can tell others about his great mercy. That it matters not how many times you fall, fail, or become disappointed in yourself because of sin, you can trust in Gods mercy to pick you up again, clean you off and encourage you to continue on ahead. So, Lord thank you for your great mercy towards me.

If you all can remember the Lord gave us a strong warning a week or two ago concerning landmines of presumption all around us and that we should be cautious to discern everything before moving forward in an action or even in a thought of presumption.

I had three test and the first two I caught myself and thank goodness the Lord stopped me from making some life changing decisions for two souls that I was praying for and seeking discernment on their behalf. Indeed, as he mentioned I had to pray longer and slower to finally see clearly in the fog.

However, this situation I failed in caught me by surprise. As I was sucker punched by the enemy in my weakest area and hit with arrows of rejection, which led me to open the door to judgment causing me fall into presumption and land right on my face.

This message is more so a teaching on how presumption can lead to suspicion, then judgment which causes a fall. This is one of the enemies greatest tactics to use in relationship of any kind. Friendships, family relations, groups, and especially marriages. I want to share my weakness and expose my sin in hopes it will help another rise above these demon of presumption and trust God to bring clarity and perspective before you react when you find yourself in a similar situation.

The enemy used me to bring judgment on my own intercessory core group. I know right, I am hot mess.
After having a spiritual warfare dream concerning the group. I sent out an email to encourage the importance of joining our meetings. My words were strong, and some members took offense to it however and after sharing the message about jealously some came forth with having feelings of scorn towards me. They confessed all of this freely with me and the Lord in his goodness made us make amends swiftly with one another.

I have come to love our little family and so grateful that we are open, honest and transparent with each other, so the enemy doesn’t get a foot hold. So many times, they are quick to confess their weaknesses and sins towards each other. It’s so beautiful to see and be a part of. That is a beautiful grace God has given are group and I hope we can continue to keep it.

We had another meeting and not all were able to attend, and I left the meeting feeling drained and burdened about our group. I tried to shake it off, so I went into prayer before the Lord to confirm if what I was sensing was true and sure enough pulled a rhema said, “Pray for your children”.

So Immediately sent out a message to the intercessors that we need to pray for the group something is amiss. I woke up the next morning full of anxiety and asked a couple of them to pray for my discernment and for our little family.

When I went into prayer my mass readings, we’re all about being slandered and reproached and not fearing man. As tears ran down my face confirming all I was feeling.

Many arrows of rejection & insecurity hit me hard and thoughts of other recent disappointments hit me as I was feeling so weary and tired from everything, honestly. I went to Mother Clare to receive guidance and prayer how to handle this situation. She encouraged me greatly to press on as I received wisdom to not say anything about this, but simply to pray instead.

Then one of the intercessors reached out to me after praying for me and the group and said, he got good readings about the group. The first was “Brotherly love”, which is always a great reading of unity in the group however, for me he got “Jealousy” and scriptures on “Salvation”. He then said, he had a vision of me standing with bushes surrounding my feet and felt that they were some sort of hinderances in the spirit.

In my pride I thought really, I felt the Lord was telling me differently. I had received a rhema that day which said “Remember this is all about salvation” confirming what I was told. Guys, you would think this would cause me to reconsider my presumption at this point, but I went on that day praying for myself and praying for the group still feeling very vulnerable and uneasy. Then that evening during my adoration time the Lord gave me a beautiful reading which I will share with you guys at the end of this message further confirming that I shouldn’t fear man, to move bravely in the midst of criticism of others and that he has made me a Mother of souls and he stand behind me, paraphrasing.

I thought wow, Lord thank you so much, as tears of now peace came, thinking that I hadn’t discern wrong and something was amiss, but God was with me in this and that is all that has ever mattered to me. Right before I was to go to sleep, I finally went to the Bible promises for a different matter and got “Money’ which almost always means the “world”. I was confused wondering why I got that reading and began to examine myself if anyone of my thoughts or actions had been in the world. I meditated on it for a bit then went to sleep.

The following morning after prayer I got rhema’s and they were not good or encouraging. I thought uh-oh Lord, I must’ve went veered off somewhere. I got the rhema “Psalm 15” and it said examine yourself? The Psalm reads

“Lord, who may dwell in your sacred tent?
Who may live on your holy mountain?

The one whose walk is blameless,
who does what is righteous,
who speaks the truth from their heart;

whose tongue utters no slander,
who does no wrong to a neighbor,
and casts no slur on others;

who despises a vile person
but honors those who fear the Lord;
who keeps an oath even when it hurts,
and does not change their mind;

who lends money to the poor without interest;
who does not accept a bribe against the innocent.
Whoever does these things
will never be shaken.”

Now I really though oh boy, I messed up. Lord show me where I erred please. I sat with the Lord before the Eucharist and he made it known to me that I had opened the door by passing judgment on the group in my presumption and I fell for it. I was stunned thinking, but Lord, what about the rhema’s and the confirmations?

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