Get Out! Get Out! Get Out! Get Out! Get Out!

Incident Report to Super Earth High Command

Filed By: Helldiver Rubber Duck
Designation: S.E.S. Soul of Audacity
Mission Type: Extraction Operation — Illuminate Conflict Zone
Vehicle Type: F.R.V. (Fast Reconnaissance Vehicle)
Difficulty: Level 10

Mission Summary:
During an ongoing extraction mission, Helldivers Rubber Duck, Brasta, and Wolf boarded an F.R.V. to initiate a tactical withdrawal under heavy Illuminate pressure. Helldiver Rubber Duck operated the mounted machine gun, providing suppressive fire while Brasta piloted the vehicle through hostile terrain.

In an attempt to assist the squad, Helldiver Wolf deployed a stratagem — a turret — meant to provide rear security. However, the stratagem beacon malfunctioned mid-air, impacting directly atop the F.R.V.’s roof, just above the driver’s compartment.

Duck’s sarcastic “Really?” was followed by Brasta’s rapid five-time evacuation command:

“Get out! Get out! Get out! Get out! Get out!”

The squad bailed from the vehicle seconds before impact. The Hellpod carrying the turret descended at an unusual angle, narrowly missing the F.R.V. and crashing harmlessly into the dirt.

Duck: “Oh, the car’s fine.”
Brasta: “That was lucky.”
Wolf: “I did that on purpose.”

After a collective sigh of relief, Duck reprimanded Wolf with a playful, “You get five less minutes of sleep tonight for that.”
The squad regrouped, remounted the vehicle, and continued spreading freedom across the sector — one near-disaster at a time.

Status Report:

Casualties: 0 (Miraculously)

Vehicle Integrity: 95%

Stratagem Accuracy: Debatable

Morale: Extremely High

FOR SUPER EARTH. FOR DEMOCRACY.

🎨 Pixel artwork by Cronos-99 — thanks for letting us use your art!