The One-In-A-Million Shot

Incident Report to Super Earth High Command

Filed By: Helldiver Rubber Duck
Designation: S.E.S. Soul of Audacity
Incident Type: Friendly Fire – Accidental Termination
Location: Classified Automaton-Controlled Planet
Involved Personnel:

Helldiver Rubber Duck (Reporting Officer)

Helldiver Wolf

Helldiver Brasta

Incident Summary:
Upon planetary insertion into an Automaton-controlled environment rated Level 10 Hostility, the squad established a perimeter while deploying standard-issue stratagems. During the initial engagement phase, a hostile walker engaged the unit, narrowly missing Reporting Officer Duck with a high-yield missile.

Attempting to neutralize the target, Duck fired a round aimed at the walker’s leg joint — a calculated yet tragically misaligned shot. The projectile deviated slightly off course, bypassed the walker’s armor plating, and fatally impacted Helldiver Wolf in the cranial region.

Following the incident, Wolf’s final comm transmission: “Oh, Duck.”
Duck immediately responded in disbelief: “No, no way! I was aiming at a—”
Helldiver Brasta interjected over comms: “Duck is murdering Wolf again.”
Subsequent transmissions consisted of confusion, apologies, and the standard squad morale recovery procedures (laughter).

No disciplinary action recommended — morale impact classified as “Positive.”
Helldiver Wolf was immediately redeployed via reinforcement beacon.

For Democracy. For Super Earth.

🎨 Pixel artwork by Cronos-99 — thanks for letting us use your art!