Mom’s Grieving The Loss of Her Son

Mom treated me to teppanyaki, for an early birthday. She pulled a lot of mom moves, and I let her; because some battles you just can’t win. She made sure to let the waitress know I was allergic to sesame seeds. She told her twice. That that’s good mom protection. Before we finished our lunch, she made sure to let everybody know it was my birthday. Of course, that meant a complementary dessert, and a special birthday song. I rolled with it. There’s no sense in making a scene, or being embarrassed. After lunch we stopped at a specialty grocery store. Mom insisted that I have an ice cream cone. I tried, gently, to tell her I didn’t want one. That was useless. Sometimes it’s easier, to be agreeable. I chose the Java chip single scoop ice cream cone. It was delicious. When we got back to mom’s place, she brought up my brother‘s passing. She had a lot of valid questions. Honestly, she had a right, as a mom, to know why her son died. Unfortunately, her feelings were never validated. I saw the sadness in her eyes. That’s when it hit me. Mom isn’t going to be around forever. I may never get another day like this, where mom made me feel like a child again.

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It’s hard when a parent loses a child. Their first born. The closest person to them, by blood bond. Yet, the son’s wife has to be honored and respected. What about the grieving mother? It’s a sad situation, when your mind can’t reconcile the death. Sometimes a simple explanation, can put the mind at ease. If my husband died, I would allow his parent access to any information. I see the heartache, when you are left searching for answers.