The Word, Season 3, Episode 20, 26/03/93

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**The Word – Series 3, Episode 20 (26 March 1993)**

Another Friday night, another hour of *The Word*—Channel 4’s answer to the question “what happens if you mix Smash Hits, *News of the World*, and a stag do in Ibiza?”

First up, **Shaun Ryder** shuffles on to prove two things: (1) he’s still alive, and (2) the Happy Mondays aren’t quite as dead as the tabloids keep insisting. He introduces his “new look” band, which basically means dragging in anyone who once shared a pint with The Smiths. Ryder insists it’s all about the music, not the money—which is exactly the kind of thing people say when they definitely don’t have the money.

We’re then treated to the classic *Word* pastime: digging up dodgy old footage to embarrass people. Tonight’s victim is **Tasmin Archer**, who allegedly once sang Rolls Royce covers at a school gig and might (or might not) have popped up in a cheap pop video called *Making a Million at the Corner Shop*. The segment can’t quite decide if it’s an exposé or just bullying, but either way, the footage is so grainy it looks like it was filmed through a potato.

Not to be outdone, the show’s “separated at birth” slot compares **Gary Oldman as Dracula** with professional hat-wearer **John McCririck**, before absolutely savaging **Kevin Costner**’s brief stint as a wannabe rock star. His band, *The Roving Boys*, perform a dirge called *The Simple Truth*, proving that even Oscar winners should sometimes stick to the day job.

Then comes the pièce de résistance: **Margi Clarke** hijacks the format with a hidden “Margi Cam,” exposing a male guest’s tragic chat-up technique during his pre-show flirtation. The footage plays back like a training video in how *not* to pull. Clarke then roasts him further live on air, tequila in hand, while the audience laps up his embarrassment. It’s car-crash TV in its purest form, and nobody escapes with dignity intact.

The music is the only thing holding the whole circus together: **Hole** (with Courtney Love in full rock-witch mode) thrash their way through grunge chaos, **Sub Sub** bring rave sunshine with “Ain’t No Love (Ain’t No Use),” reggae star **Shaggy** gets everyone grinding with “Oh Carolina,” and the **James Taylor Quartet** remind us that acid jazz really was a thing in the ’90s.

Finally, Ryder reappears to chat candidly about heroin addiction before the show closes with something called “Rainbow Mobile 50,” a finale so baffling it makes sense only if you’ve already downed three tequilas yourself.

The verdict? A glorious mess: equal parts gig, gossip rag, and drunken hen party. *The Word* doesn’t just push boundaries—it stumbles over them, laughs, and then demands you buy it a kebab.

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