Greta Thunberg Calls For 'Global Uprising' For Gaza, But She Should Rise Up Against Her Hair Stylist

Posted • September 1, 2025: Back in June, Greta Thunberg was detained by Israeli forces after attempting to sail to Gaza. She must have enjoyed her time in Israeli custody, despite her claims she was 'kidnapped,' because she's doing it again. —— Greta Thunberg, about to set sail to Gaza, "this story is also about a global uprising, about how people are stepping up when our governments fail to do so." —— Girl, whoever told you bangs looked good was lying to you. Greta’s last attempt at “fueling the global uprising” went great https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GzrzVKmW8AA02xp?format=jpg&name=900x900 —— So great. https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GzrZf1MW8AAnomT?format=jpg&name=small —— Heh. A lot of people dont know this, but Greta uses a sharpened rock tool to cut her hair because of the carbon used in scissor making. LMAO. Her royal lineage goes back centuries. https://pbs.twimg.com/media/GzrzI1QWIAAwfA-?format=jpg&name=medium —— 'Some of you may die, but that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.'

Hair stylist: So, what look are you going for? —— Greta: I'm looking for something that really brings out my autism. —— Hair stylist: Say no more. —— Aaaaaand we're dead. We all have that one cousin who cuts their own bangs. Greta is that cousin. —— She manages to squeeze in genocide, climate, environment, colonization, and fascism in a 25 second sound bite. https://video.twimg.com/tweet_video/Gzr25Z7bcAAQIyh.mp4 —— Truly amazing. (…)

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https://twitchy.com/amy-curtis/2025/08/31/greta-thunberg-global-uprising-gaza-n2418213