Premium Only Content

Hepatitis
Lyrics
Yo, rolled up to Tim Hortons, cravin’ that double-double,
But now my stomach’s doin’ flips, man, this ain’t no trouble bubble!
Heard the news on the air, Hepatitis A in the mix,
Fecal-oral transmission? Man, this ain’t no fix!
Walked in, saw the crew, mostly Singhs on the grind,
Flippin’ donuts and coffee, but hygiene’s hard to find!
No soap in the sink, just a shrug and a grin,
Now my liver’s like, “Yo, where do I begin?”
Hepatitis, hepatitis, got me feelin’ so sick,
Singh Hortons served me a virus with my quick pick!
Wash them hands, yo, don’t leave me in a bind,
Fast food funk got my health on the line!
Ordered a Timbits bag, thought it’d be a treat,
But now I’m googlin’ symptoms, feelin’ the heat!
Somewhere in Canada, they said watch your back,
Hep A hittin’ hard like a fast-food attack!
Saw a dude with no gloves, sneezin’ by the till,
I yelled, “Bro, that’s a biohazard, chill!”
Immigration jokes flyin’ on the news thread,
But let’s be real, it’s hygiene—get that in your head!
Hepatitis, hepatitis, got me feelin’ so sick,
Singh Hortons served me a virus with my quick pick!
Wash them hands, yo, don’t leave me in a bind,
Fast food funk got my health on the line!
Cream donut lookin’ good, but it’s a Hep A trap,
Fecal-oral flow, man, that’s a lyrical clap!
C-D-C said wash up, but they missed the memo,
Now I’m rappin’ from the couch, feelin’ like a demo!
No more Tim Hortons for me, I’m done with the scene,
Hygiene’s a mess, and I ain’t that keen!
Tim Hortons, step up, train your crew with care,
Or I’m out for good—never comin’ back there!
Laughin’ through the pain, but I ain’t playin’ games,
Next time I’ll bring gloves, avoid the viral flames!
News posts blowin’ up, spreadin’ the word around,
Hepatitis hustle—keep my liver sound!
[Chorus]
Hepatitis, hepatitis, got me feelin’ so sick,
Singh Hortons served me a virus with my quick pick!
Wash them hands, yo, don’t leave me in a bind,
Fast food funk got my health on the line!
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