If Jonah had an iPhone 🤣

3 months ago
34

Imagine Jonah with an iPhone, trying to ghost God—**he turned off location, but heaven’s still tracking 📍👀**. He books a one-way boat trip via app, posts, “Running from my calling like 🏃💨 #NoNinevehForMe.” His followers are confused—“Weren’t you chosen?” Storm hits. Jonah tweets mid-chaos: “Okay… maybe I messed up 🌊😬.” Phone goes flying as he's tossed overboard. Three days of no signal—inside a giant fish, journaling on Notes app: “Okay God, you win. I’ll go.” He finally uploads a repentance video, raw and unfiltered. **#FishTales #Can’tOutswimGod #SwallowedAndSaved #ProphetOnTheRun #DivineRedirect** — the escape plan that turned into a purpose.

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