Tales From the Cantina

r/humansarespaceorcs
u/_Thorshammer_

Tales From the Cantina: "Look, this while thing makes more sense if you treat humanity like a hive mind where the queen has gone insane and lost control of the drones."

The table went silent after this bold, and rather loud, statement.
Seeing that he had his audience's attention, G'Churk took his time on a long draught of his beverage.
After several deep and breathless swallows he forcefully set the mug down on the table and signaled the waitbeing for another before finally turning his attention back to his audience.
"It's simple, really. Let's take a swarm of Narthian needle bugs as our example. They don't look dangerous, right? I mean, yeah, they have those tiny pincers and the stinger, but their nips and stings don't really hurt and the poison is more of an irritant than anything, right?"
Every being at the table knew this, so the question was met mostly with irritated expectancy.
"Similarly, humans have fangs, but they're not really sharp and their claws are mostly decorative. If they bite you their mouth is a sewer, but it's nothing an antibiotic course can't handle, right?"
Most of his audience found themselves nodding along - this stuff was common knowledge, but less common than the needle bug factoids.
G'Churk absently thanked the waitbeing for his refill, took (for him) a modest swallow, and continued.
"Any individual needle bug is easy to squish, right? Their exoskeleton is soft and they don't move very fast, do they? Likewise, humans have no natural armor and most of them don't run very fast, if at all."
The table rewarded this gest with a few quiet chuckles.
"But..." he continued "...Narthian needlers are tightly controlled and banned on almost every world of the Conclave. Why?"
There were beginning to be some very thoughtful expressions around the table.