The Laughing Deathworlders

r/humansarespaceorcs
Shadeskira

The Galactic Council meeting chamber was filled with its usual hum of activity—representatives from dozens of species debating, sharing knowledge, and coordinating their collective efforts. At the center of the room stood Commander Vesrik of the Iktar Collective, his chitinous exoskeleton glinting under the soft bioluminescent lights.

“Humans,” he began, his voice a low hum that carried a mixture of admiration and exasperation. “Once again, I must bring to this Council’s attention the... peculiarities of our most versatile allies.”

A low murmur swept through the chamber. Humanity’s reputation was no secret, and most species had their own stories of awe—or frustration—when dealing with the Terran explorers.

“The recent expedition to Zyxar-7, a Class 21 Hazardous Environment, has yielded excellent results,” Vesrik continued. “The humans established a fully functional mining outpost within three weeks. However...” He paused, mandibles clicking in irritation. “They have renamed the planet ‘Spicy Rockball.’”

Laughter, or the equivalent sounds from various species, erupted throughout the chamber. A Cevalan diplomat, her jelly-like body rippling with amusement, spoke up. “Perhaps they found it fitting?”

“I demanded an explanation,” Vesrik said, his tone sharp. “Their leader merely said, and I quote, ‘The air burns your lungs like chili, and the rocks are spicy because they explode if you touch them wrong.’”

Another wave of laughter swept the room. The humans, seated in their section of the chamber, grinned with pride. Their representative, a woman named Captain Sarah Lorne, leaned back in her chair, arms crossed, enjoying the chaos.

“Why must they name every planet with such... irreverence?” asked a Rylak delegate, their voice a series of clicks and growls. “What was wrong with the Council’s designation of Zyxar-7?”

“It lacked flavor,” Sarah replied, a sly smile on her face. “And honestly, it helps morale when you’re spending weeks breathing spicy air.”