The Tariff Sheriff

Tariff Sherrif

Bb
He’s got a leather holster on his hip,
F
To hold his can o’ Diet Coke
Gm
A tombstone on his desktop
F
It’s just read’s “Here lies Woke”.
Gm. F.
He starts each day by signing documents that give the
Eb
Talking heads on TV strokes!
F. Eb.
To some people he’s George Washington
Eb. Bb
To others proof the universe can make a joke.

Bb
And I don’t think that in the future they’ll believe
F
it all started with an escalator ride
Gm
Depending what you ask and depending who talk to
F
We’ve either resurrected or we’ve all just up and died
Eb. F. Gm.
And now just hoping to hold a conversation out in public seems impossible
F. Eb
I know because I’ve tried!
Eb. F.
Is he a man on a mission, or just a machine that
Eb. F. Bb
reflects back what we all hide deep inside?

Who knows

F
But he’s the tariff sheriff!
Bb
He’s the king of the talk-along,
F
He started talk back in 46’
Eb. Bb
And now he’s got me me singing this song!
Eb. F
He gets one in four to celebrate
Gm. F. Eb
Sometimes two in three to whine,
Eb. F.
He’s a walking Rorschach with a flag lapel
Eb. F. Bd
A political Mason-Dixon Line

Bb
He can raise certain people’s blood pressure,
F
With just a certain color hat!
Gm
And surge the urge to key electric cars!
F
Who-da-hell-woulda expected that!
En. F
He’s driven trash trucks, and been a line cook,
Bb. Eb
He’s even voted Democrat.
F. Eb
Is he a tribune of the plebs,
Eb. Bb
Or eccentric aristocrat?

F
But he’s the tariff sheriff
Bb
And he’s the king of the talk along
F
He keep swearing it’s all going great,
Bb
Yet here I am singin’ this song
Eb. F
He says he sees a brilliant future
Bb. F. Eb
And I sure hope he ain’t wrong,
Eb. F
Cause it seemes like old America
Eb. F. Bb
Could be going, going, gone!

Bb
He wears underwear sewn by Betsy Ross
F
At least he sure would if he could
Gm
He was born on Flag Day!
F
I half expect he’s got a tooth made of wood!
Eb. F
Some people swear that he’s a monster,
Bd. F. Eb
Others say he’s walkin’ the path to sainthood
Eb. F
He’s got his name on every prayer roll,
Eb. F. Bb
And a Star on Hollywood!

So who is he?

Well….
F
He’s the tariff sheriff
Bb
He’s the king of the talk along
F
He’s the lead roll in some people’s nightmares
Eb. F. Bb
And the subject of my song
Eb. F.
He says he’s here to save America
Bb. F. Eb
I say he better not take long!
Eb. F.
Cause if it’s time to save our country,
Eb. F. Bb
I think I’d like to tag along!

F
With the tariff sheriff
Bb
And the king of the talk along