ARC024 - Jennifers Letter for ManBook-Live

This is the original text of the letter Jennifer sent to me on 22 May 2007 16:23 German time.
-----Original Message-----
From: Jenni Nolan [mailto:jxxxxxx]
Sent: 22 May 2007 16:23
To: peter@peternolan.com
Subject: RE: by the way

Dearest Peter,

As you know I came to the forum to have a breakthrough in my relationship with you. As people have gotten up to speak I have seen aspects of my way of being reflected in their stories. As I listened the possibility has dawned on me that while I have complained of being bullied by you I have actually been the bully. I have been so stubborn as to make our marriage unworkable.

I have resisted nearly everything you suggested, all to show you that you are not the boss of me. I guess after all these years and divorce on the table it should be pretty clear to both of us that that's the case.

The possibility I have invented for myself and my life is the possibility of head over heels love, passionate, compassionate, generous and unstoppable. I have also taken on the possibility of abundance. Years ago you asked me to create a relationship and invite you to be enrolled in it. Last night I finally did that. I don't blame you for being cynical about that invitation. A less persistant man would have divorced me years ago.

You are the Samson that holds up the roof of the wortld over me and our family. I have been Delialh pretending to love you while undermining your strength. I am so sorry for that. I realise that for us to have the relationship of my possibility I will have to give up making you wrong.

I am committed to having this possibility in my life. I will have head-over-heels love with someone and you are my first choice.

I know you feel the relationship with our children is secondary and I have always made you wrong for that. I want our relationship to be complete freeing you to be a father to them. Will you be their father? No amount of mother love can compensate them for the loss of you. I am also standing in the possibility of our children attending the teen forum. I see how I have enrolled them in my stories about you to their detriment. I want them to have the loving relationship with you I know is possible.

Now I have created a possibility for my life do you think it is one I might enroll you in? I invite you to share a life with me more wonderful than we could ever have apart.

My offer to you is nothing less than myself, utterly, totally and completely,

With all my love Jenni