The Self-State Model for Self-Regulation for Sexuality | TMA Conference 2024 Presentation

On 6/1/24, I presented at the Transformation Ministries Alliance 2nd conference in Williamstown, KY. One of the main concepts I teach my clients is the self-state model, which I learned from Joseph Nicolosi, Sr. I have found it to have wide-ranging application, as it explains the states of emotional regulation and dysregulation that precede any compulsive behavior, including homosexual enactment. My contribution to the model is fusing it with polyvagal theory and the different threat reactions.

#selfstates #polyvagaltheory #threatreactions #assertion #shame #grayzone #actingout #doublebind #doublelooping #grief #addiction #sexuality #sexualcompulsivity #coregulation #selfregulation #emotions

References:
Hu, S.H., Wei, N., Wang, Q.D., Yan, L.Q., Wei, E.Q., Zhang, M.M., Hu, J.B., Huang, M.L., Zhou, W.H., Xu, Y. (Nov. 2008). Patterns of brain activation during visually evoked sexual arousal differ between homosexual and heterosexual men. American Journal of Neuroradiology, 29 (10):1890-1896.
Nicolosi, J.J. (2016). Shame and Attachment Loss: The Practical Work of Reparative Therapy (Revised Ed.). Liberal Minds.
Porges, S.W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-regulation. Norton.
Safron, A., Barch, B., Bailey, J.M., Gitelman, D.R., Parrish, T.B., Reber, P.J. (April 2007). Neural correlates of sexual arousal in homosexual and heterosexual men. Behavioral Neuroscience,121 (2): 237-48.

Timestamps:
4:21 Teaching objectives.
5:04 Nicolosi's book Shame & Attachment Loss.
5:26 Defining self-states.
7:21 Feeling and dealing (affective competence).
8:54 The basic self-states.
9:26 Assertion.
14:25 Expressive emotions.
15:55 Shame and double-binds.
19:07 Assertion vs. shame.
20:04 Shame-based reactions.
23:34 Gray zone.
25:40 Inhibitory emotions.
26:19 Acting out.
28:15 The way back to assertion.
30:14 Double-looping.
34:52 Grief.
36:58 Polyvagal theory.
38:48 Threat reactions.
43:31 Self-state parallels to polyvagal theory.
44:30 Assertion and homeostasis.
45:45 Shame and fight/flight/fawn.
46:11 Freeze and flop.
46:28 Self-regulation for each state.
48:47 Reinforcing assertion in therapy.

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-Andrew Rodriguez