Immigrants should all become lifeguards because they are ‘excellent swimmers’ – NYC Mayor

Did you know that all people who come to the US are excellent swimmers? Neither did we, but fortunately New York Mayor Eric Adams is on hand to bring us up to speed.

During a press briefing on Tuesday, Adams was asked by reporters about potential lifeguard shortages ahead of Memorial Day. The mayor took this opportunity to put one of his high-IQ schemes into the spotlight, suggesting that all 197,100 immigrants in the city could become lifeguards, because they are all ‘excellent swimmers,’ and it’s only that pesky red tape stopping the city becoming a Baywatch convention. That, according to Adams, is the ‘only obstacle.’

‘That just does not make sense,’ said Adams, and it was unclear if he was referring to the red tape or to his plan.

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