Epstein versus United Airlines Joke

Please enjoy this joke about Jeffrey Epstein and United Airlines.
Upcoming tour dates:
New Cumberland, WV March 22. Mountaineer Casino (Bonkerz)
Beverly, MA March 29-30 Off Cabot Comedy Club.
East Rutherford, NJ April 5-6 Bananas.
Springfield, MA April 19-20. Roar Comedy Club at MGM
Cleveland, OH April 25-27. Hilarities.
Austin, TX May 11. Cap City.
Raleigh, NC May 12. Good Nights.
Albuquerque, NM June 20-22 Hyenas.
Minneapolis, MN July 10-13 Acme.
Manasquan, NJ Sept. 28. Algonquin Theater (with Joe DeVito)