A Satiric Resolution Proposal to the Foreign Policy Experts of Hernando County, FL

5 months ago
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This citizen's "Resolution" was in response to the Hernando County, FL Board of County Commissioners (BOCC) Resolution in support of Israel's right to defend itself, which was passed by the foreign policy experts and true statesmen of the BOCC on November 7, 2023. The video clip, which inspired this moment can be viewed here: https://rumble.com/v3yshty-hernando-county-fl-commissioners-conduct-us-foreign-policy-part-1.html

Here is the full text of the tongue-in-cheek Resolution proposed by Hernando County, FL citizen, Brad Benson, who is sick and frapping tired of authoritarian clowns serving at all levels of Government under the unenlightened Governorship of Ron DeSantis.

Prediction: The Florida Republican Presidential Primary will be stolen by these losers, if the citizens of Florida don't stand up and stop them. There is no other way that Ron DeSantis could ever beat Donald Trump in the Sunshine State in a fair election. Remember you heard it here first!

RESOLUTION

Whereas: The Hernando County Board of County Commissioners takes their world view from Sean Hannity; their fake news from The Hernando Sun; their inspiration from luminaries like Blaise Ingoglia and faux war heroes like Homer Holcomb; and their marching orders from the DeSantis Wing of the Republican Party; and,

Whereas: They eschew the role of ‘representative’; usurp the mantle of power; adopt the title of ‘leader’; and bristle at citizen dissenters who exhibit the temerity to question their naked political virtue signaling; and,

Whereas: They possess the power to marginalize, denigrate, castigate, incriminate, humiliate, de-platform and silence dissenting voices; and,

Whereas: They are wiser, richer, better connected, more worldly and more patriotic than lowly citizens and conspiracy theorists like me; and,

Whereas: It was always inappropriate, inconsiderate and indecent for me or my “sycophants” to question the motives or political machinations of those who would be king; and,

Whereas: Israel’s “right to defend itself” now includes attacks into Lebanon; the bombing of Syria; complete annexation of the northern half of the Gaza Strip; the demolition of critical civilian infrastructure and thousands of homes; extension of the war into Iran; and the annihilation and mutilation of at least 15,000 civilians, including more than 4,000 children;

Now therefore, be it known: that I have come to recognize the error of my peaceful ways; acknowledge that any criticism of Israel is inherently anti-Semitic; prostrate myself before this noble body; apologize for my impudence and impertinence; thank them for their collective statesmanship; and humbly pray for their absolution.

Be it further known: to those whose patriotic pro-war sensitivities may have been offended by my foolish and insensitive advocacy for an isolationist policy which takes care of America first, that I accept that I must now embrace and endorse permanent war, torture, ethnic cleansing and crimes against humanity as quintessentially American and endorse full spectrum dominance, universal hegemony and American Exceptionalism are essential elements to the contemporary American concept of “life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness”.

Therefore, in pursuit of these most worthy and holy goals: I beseech this esteemed Board to pass a more powerful Resolution, which more faithfully represents the strategic vision of the Ron DeSantis/Nikki Haley wing of the Uniparty, and thus envisions an immediate nuclear first strike on Russia, China, Iran, North Korea and Stockholm, Sweden, which is the hometown of Greta Thunberg. Only when they are first turned to dust and glass, can we enjoy the world we seek; the world to which we are justly entitled; and the world that we so richly deserve.

Respectfully Submitted on this 28th day of November, 2023.

____________________________________
Brad Benson, Conspiracy Analyst and Petitioner

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