SurrealPolitiks S01E031 - Race Riot to the Bottom

Among the most embarrassing moments in this Country's history, perhaps even in the history of humanity, were those pertaining to the canonization of Saint George Floyd.

Saint Floyd, the Patron Saint of Fentanyl, Armed Robbery, and Counterfeiting, was beatified in the year 2020 following his death of a drug overdose. Since our country has given up on the concept of truth, and allowed itself to be ruled by force and fraud, the undisputed nature of this cause of death was allowed to be cast aside, and instead replaced by a narrative conjured in the minds of the most violent and dishonest people in the world.

You see, Saint Floyd had died of this drug overdose while he was resisting arrest, near certainly as a consequence of his effort to avoid a possession charge by swallowing the drugs which were supposed to last him into the next day. He was, moments prior, caught passing a counterfeit bill to a small business owner in order to steal cigarettes, and when this had the predictable result of attracting the attention of law enforcement, Saint Floyd set himself on the path to Martyrdom by fighting the officers.

Video showed Saint Floyd complaining that he could not breath well prior to being pinned to the ground. Whether this was because the fentanyl had already begun to suppress his respiratory function, or because he believed this would make his escape easier, we can only speculate, but we do know that by the time he was on the ground beneath the merciful hands of Derek Chauvin, the complaints had long since begun.

On account of this, and since Saint Floyd was a large man with a history of violence who was still struggling with police, the officers taking him into custody did as their training commanded, and continued to restrain Saint Floyd while he continued complaining about his capacity to breath. When Saint Floyd ceased to fight them, they loosened their restraint, but by then, he was unconscious and soon to die.

It might go without saying that those who find themselves gleefully at war with civilization immediately blamed the officers. Clearly, they would have us believe, that as soon as a criminal says he cannot breath, the officers have a moral and legal obligation to set him loose upon the citizenry he had victimized just moments ago, and habitually over the course of his criminal career.

The ordered liberty characteristic of Western Civilization, requiring force as it does for its maintenance, cannot be allowed to stand, in their view. Violence must only be exercised in the most chaotic and dangerous manner possible, by the least responsible people in our society. Any notion of controlled and reasonable force is what they call "White Supremacy" and this organized system of control is the only form of oppression they will not abide.

So it was not at all surprising that these people set to their routine of rioting, looting, and burning down buildings, prior to any investigation of the incident.

What was slightly more surprising to all but the most well informed, was the rapidity with which supposedly responsible authorities, joined with the forces of chaos.

The cause of Saint Floyd's Martyrdom was never in dispute. He had consumed a lethal dose of fentanyl, and this was discovered quite early in the investigation. No injury attributable to the officers that could have caused his death was discovered in the autopsy. Saint Floyd was just another dead junky criminal, so far as the science was concerned.

But trusting the science has limited utility in post truth America. If by "the science" you mean, Dr. Fauci, it is doctrine and to contradict this is blaspheme. If it disproves racist police murdering blacks for sport, it is "White Supremacy" and must be discarded.

So began America's hazing ritual as she entered the fraternity of the third world. Monuments were built, politicians kneeled, shoplifting was legalized, riots and arson and even murder were considered "mostly peaceful", all who dissented were subjected to ritualistic torture of various sorts, all in service to one more dead junky criminal.

The officers were, for all intents and purposes, crucified. The city paid the dead junky criminal's family $27,000,000. And with this, the total inversion of our legal system was all but complete.

For the rest of that year, as Americans were prohibited from attending church, locked in their homes, laid off from their jobs, put out of business, and conscripted into the black bloc with mask mandates in the name of COVID-19, the one sort of public gathering that was permitted, were race riots. These, we were told, were the cure to the only public health crisis more serious than COVID-19, that being, White Supremacy, of course.

You might recall, the virus was so dangerous, and the racism, so pervasive, that these were the excuses offered by Mark Elias and his band of licensed subversives as they set about on a "sue and settle" scheme to abolish all fraud protections in our elections. While race riots were good clean fun for the whole family, and liquor stores, abortion clinics, and marijuana dispensaries were considered essential services, polling places, by contrast, joined with churches in being far too dangerous for human beings to be found near.

And so every name and address ever entered into a voter registration database, and a few not so registered, received ballots in the mail. Signature verification, obviously one more relic of a racist past, was necessarily abolished, and with no regard for legitimacy, Democrats demanded, quite literally, that "every vote be counted" - in some contrast to those days now long forgotten when there was such a thing as eligibility for the privilege.

To the casual observer, this subversion of all anti-fraud measures might have seemed odd for the Democrats, who had warned with some hysteria that Donald Trump and every villain willing to vote for him were lawless criminals who would do anything to maintain their grip on power. Were they really so concerned about this, they might have taken measures to make our elections much harder to cheat, but they assured us through their friends in the press that the racism and the sniffles simply made this impossible, and that while Donald Trump would collude with foreign powers and sell out his country for the simple joy of being admired by an Eastern European dictator, and while his supporters were willing to risk prison and death for the simple rush of assaulting vulnerable demographics, surely democracy was just so sacred that none would dare to take advantage of this opportunity to steal the most powerful elected office on the planet.

And with this narrative so pervasively echoed through all the proper channels, the 2020 election was conducted. Despite the danger, record numbers of voters appeared at their polling places, and all new records were set for use of the postal service to deliver votes subject to no verification whatsoever. With this tremendous flood of public opinion being so overwhelming, as the counting went on into the night, leaky toilets were reported as water main breaks, and all manner of other excuses were made to stop the counting and exclude observers.

With all these anomalies, accepted by our masters in the press as a "new normal", it is perhaps unsurprising that a man who barely campaigned, excited nobody, and offended even his core constituencies routinely, became the most popular president in our Country's history.

At which point, the race riots, came to a rather anticlimatic conclusion.

Those appropriately skeptical of the veracity of these claims, were deemed thought criminals. They were banned from social media, fired from their jobs, ostracized socially, and ultimately hunted down by federal authorities and thrown into prison should they have been so bold as to register their skepticism at the Nation's Capitol.

All in the name, of one more dead junky criminal, Saint George Floyd.

Peace be upon him.

But not upon you. 

Your reward for this, was crime at home, and war abroad.

All for a lie. 

SurrealPolitiks airs live every Monday at 9:30pm US Eastern.