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Elvis finds the perfect solution to the Maian Vaping Problem(MVP).
Elvis heroically takes down the vaping problem within his fleet, with his daring diplomacy he secures a solution to the MVP (Maian Vaping Problem).
AI voices by ElevenLabs, original writing by me.
Transcript:
E: "Hello Joanna!"
JD: "Elvis, good to see you! When did you get back to Earth?"
E: "Only a few hours ago, I had to make a quick stop over in New Mexico."
JD: "The United States? Whatever for?"
E: "Well, do you remember that crate I took with me when I last left?"
JD: "That one you had shipped in from Colorado the other month? I was curious about it..."
E: "I might have made... an 'oopsie', you could say, in my excitement that day. I can't help it sometimes, there are so many strange and amazing things humans make and do!"
JD: "...What happened? Better question, WHAT was in that crate?"
E: "Er...Umm, well I might have gotten a significant portion of the 3rd fleet addicted to vaping...and they're starting to run out of refills."
JD: "Oh my God, Elvis, why!? Shouldn't you already know the health issues with so much nicotine, not to mention the inhalation of heavy metals and other toxins?"
E: "Don't worry Joanna. I found a fix for the problem, and the higher ups agree, its why I was in New Mexico. I discovered a plant based, organic, environmentally friendly, and heavy-metal free alternative. Its also much lower in nicotine, medicinally treated with menthol, and only provides a pre-measured length of enjoyment per use... Heehee! Its the perfect solution.
JD: "Oh, you can't be serious..."
E: "I promise I'm not joking Joanna. I just secured a six-month probationary contract with Native American Spirit to supply the entire fleet! And received a pay increase, a raise, for it!...High five!"
JD: "Here I've been thinking humanity had the market cornered on naivety..."
E: "Come on, don't leave me hanging!"
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