Disney's $200M Epic Failure: The Catastrophic Woke Calamity

Now for the real news: Disney Pixar's woke-tastic flop, Elemental, rocks a non-binary character, but must have forgotten the secret ingredient: audience interest. At this point, "Toy Story" could kick Elemental's $29.5 million debut to infinity, and yes, even beyond. Turns out, Garbage Human's tweet sums it up: "Every. Single. Time." Elemental's elemental failure to enchant audiences proves that moviegoers prefer engaging stories, not political sermons. But wait, there's more! Remember the $100 million loss from Strange World? Oops! Disney just can't help but attempt a creative twist on the classic 'happily ever after,' but sadly, it ain't happening for them. No subtle wink or gender-affirming procedure can fix this film fiasco. Moral of the story: give us quality entertainment, not woke-mares. Well, that's all I've got. Get the rest, tap the link in our bio.

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