Shark Con Science: Waiting for My Turn

Call Him “Quint-Essential” in Pandemic, or Just Out “Shock” Hunting, But a Big Fish Story Has Inspired More “Major” Drama

[FOB FREEDOM, July 16, 2023] Any station? Any station? Do you read? Over.

Reporting live from the world’s newest banana republic, . . .

There’s a shock in the order? Apparently, that is the theme of an unreported matter brought on mandamus to the Alexandria Circuit Court, now on interlocutory appeal to the State Supreme Court, marrying up with a related case to convene a grand jury investigation on two Virginia “fishers of men”, and when you spend time at an elite private college enjoying extracurricular activities like drama and video production, why not try to slap Don “Black Fist” Beyer, Jr. five, on the ain’t really Black side on TikTok? Says Major Mike Webb to the “Not Afraid to Burn in Hell” legislator, “Gimme SUM Sin.”

“Peter Benchley, post the premier of The Exorcist, with which we find some common themes, including the troika usually required for an exorcism, according to traditional rituals, also gives us a pandemic preview from the town of not quite Amityville, with some politicians that are very concerned about their income stream, and we find even after the first great white shark horrors in the 1975 film, those same old politicians once again far more concerned about their money in the 1978 sequel, and of course trying to paint Chief Brody as some crazy. However, at least in the movie, the rejection by the town council members of Quint is somewhat puzzling. You know the dude who had been on the top secret mission and who had all of the experience? Why do I feel a sense of deja vous? Any who. If my pastor says that big fish is the summer winning message, why not go for the President’s former nickname on the Senate Judiciary Committee, right? You know I have been known to be quite passionate, right? I either is be or ain’t be,” stated Webb, beginning to whistle the theme from the Andy Griffith Show.

Note: grandiosity is a classic sign of bipolar disorder, and we don't want to hurt his feelings lest he go to “that place”, so familiar to Arlington Public School Board Member, Latina Cristina Torres-Diaz.

Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim-cherry. A pandemic agent as lucky can be. Chim-chimera. Chim-chimera. Chim-chim--achoo. The luck'll rub off when I bump fists with you. Or blow me a kiss, and catch COVID-2.

Your elected representative is called your elected representative for a reason; and Martin Luther King and Jesus never got elected.

And let’s get ready to RUMBLE! https://rumble.com/vp2uk1-attorneys-need-not-apply-you-have-the-right-to-remain-silent.html.