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#JustForToday 7-12-23 #Patience #Recovery #schizophrenia construction & Muzik w/ #DaamnKam - #DTdjø
The DaamnTalk #RecoveryDiscovery blog is for Us addicts with co-occurring disorders & diseases! *@ 30 y/o, *nearly 2 decades ‘missed’-diagnosed, *13 page ‘criminal’ history report, *8 inpatient rehabs & *over a dozen jails- *totaling over 2 years of confinement… RECOVERY IS STILL POSSIBLE!!!!! Last year, after experiencing a seemingly random & utterly insane mental collapse of Our psyche, We were diagnosed with Schizo-E-disorder, a genetic mental-disability mimicking that of #Schizophrenia. The breakdown occurred just days after receiving an officer at Our door, with service of a perspective restraining order against ‘me’ & Our (then) 7-month old son, (via his mother).
The situation deteriorated quickly as on March 9th, 2021, We called 911 while pulling onto the side of a quiet, wooded road; underwent what felt like a heart attack after the onset of the most extreme panic-attack We’d ever had. After, (another), blackout, (the 2nd that night thus far), We ‘came to’ coasting 5mph on the wrong side of a similarly wooded, 2-lane road, with at least 3 cop cars & an ambulance surrounding Our ‘yota like they were Our own private escort service... ~{With a working ignition interlock in Our truck, We attempted to explain that We were in serious need of ‘physical/mental help.’} Mind you, We were rapidly digressing into ‘textbook’ paranoid delusion…
The officers heard Our request only after they ‘breathalyzer’d’ ‘Us’, field tested Us & then handcuffed Us into the back of an ambulance... (After passing their tests.) Our mental state during this ordeal was that of one without days & days of sleep or rest; We remember believing that the officers were attempting to perform an ‘exorcism’ on Us while at the hospital. Three large, male officers had Us pinned down onto a bed as the forth officer took out the biggest Daamn needle to take my blood. Struggling not only physically, We were mentally wrestling to comprehend what was unfolding & losing the battle! Having arrived in this scene after having bounced in & out of consciousness, resulting from calling 911 for help - While deep in disillusionment - Our last memory before waking up in a solitary cell - will literally haunt Us for the rest of Our days on Earth…..
**[It gets graphic ….. so we cut the post here]**
*RECOVERYisDISCOVERYisRECOVERYisDiscoveryDISCOVERYisRECOVERYisDiscoveryisRECOVERY*
Who knows what We may find out about ‘Self’!?
Who decides what’s actually best for ‘Us’!?
Who determines what’s possible?!
Who creates ‘their’ own reality!?
Who ‘controls’ their Recovery?
#mentalhealthawareness : Because We may not be responsible for Our Disease, but we better Daamn well be responsible for our Recovery! That’s why we’ve created #DaamnTalk (With 2 ‘A’s!) - to talk openly & freely amongst one another - discussing the things generally avoided due to ‘stigma’, ‘controversy’, or ‘political correctness’… Because BOTH of Our diseases thrive in dark, quiet solitude! AND ‘dis-ease’ will diminish when successfully brought into the light!!!!! Thanks for ‘Our’ time & We hope to Talk to You soon! {In the comments!} & of course, wherever else you get social media, you’ll find DaamnTalkDJØ 🙏🙌🏽✊🏼☯️💬
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