Cryin Brian

1 year ago
63

In the year 2012, a historical event that would change the fate of the FGC community took place. The place was a convention in Detroit, Michigan, which went by the name Youmacon, and the man was a legend named Brian Murphy, better known by his alias “Karate Lincoln” and "Abbock". At this event, Brian would go down in history by taking part in a tournament for a video game called "Ultimate Marvel V.S. Capcom 3".

Brian had fought well up to this point, but things had decidedly took a turn for the worse, when he ran into a group of local ruffians, named the "C.O.R.N". This mysterious group was aptly dubbed the "Coalition of Real Nigga's" and their skills in niggatry were displayed in full effect, as the group had honed their real nigga abilities in this local event. Things were looking tough for Brian, as money was reportedly on the line. Out of options and looking to prove his worth, Brian took a bold move. Brian wagered $90 USD that he would achieve victory in combat with elite C.O.R.N members Noel Brown and Christopher “Footwurk” Leggett, in subsequent money matches. It was a risky wager, and a furious battle ensued over the cash prize that was at stake. But in a shocking turn of events, Brian was quickly and soundly defeated by Noel Brown, who had displayed his impressive prowess of true nigga skills in his short-lived match with him. The match ended so quickly and shockingly swift, that onlookers stood in complete awe, with many describing it as unprecedented in FGC history. Witnesses stated that Brian had gotten his ass completely beat, and reportedly fucked.

Upon losing the set, Brian Murphy had began to lose his composure, his world view had began to crumble. Brian had spent so many months training and honing his skills to show the world what he was capable of, but the crushing reality of his quick defeat only proved the distance in skill between him and this formidable foe. The bold $90 that Brian had laid down in order to express full confidence in his abilities had been snatched from him, as if he was nothing more than mere child's play to the vicious might of the formidable coalition. Humiliated, and ashamed, Brian immediately made attempts to retreat, but was quickly intercepted by the group for an unexpected interrogation. Upon making contact with Murphy, the group was met with a teary-eyed Brian, who would subsequently be dubbed the moniker, of "Cryin' Brian", by the group. Moved by this sudden outburst of passion, the group quickly pressured Brian to explain this behavior, as any emotional expression involving the profuse shedding of tears, is considered to be a heinous crime and an affront to the nigga-arts. Emotionally compromised and flustered, Brian made his plea. Brian attempted to explain to the group that the nature of his tears was not a result of monetary deprivation, but due to not achieving the desired respect of his peers. Upon being confronted on the boldness of waging money as a sign of overconfidence on his part, Brian proceeded to argue that his money challenge was not a sign of conceit, but of good faith in the hype-arts, an attempt to generate excitement and determination from his opponent and onlookers. Unconvinced, the group began to call attention to Brian's noticeable gap in skill and ability compared to the group's, expressing reassurance that Brian was fully keen on how "ass" his performance had been. Brian quickly attempts to justify his lacking performance as a result of originating from a land called Columbus, located in Ohio. Brian pointed out that Columbus lacked prominent challengers that were worthy of contention, resulting in Brian's own skills to reach a plateau. When pressured on why Brian had not consulted a Columbian native of the coalition for matches, Brian contests that said member was preoccupied with a more pressing matter, and was unable to spar in a set. After a pause for consideration, the group redirected their focus back to Brian's poor management of his loss, and drew attention to his behavior, which they repeatedly described as emasculate, and fell far below the standards of what they considered to be a genuine "nigga". Brian stated his case logically and passionately, bringing to light the fact that he did not fall under the ill-defined category of a true "nigga" and that therefore his merits should not have been judged under such a criteria, but his perceived effeminate disposition was only met with big gales of stupid laughter from the coalition.

The group assured Brian that the nature of his financial loss was simply a byproduct of an environment supported by the current socio-ecological model, and that Brian's outburst of emotion was an unfit coping method. Brian attempted to reassure the group that he was employed, elucidating the fact that monetary loss was not a perceived issue for him. Upon careful consideration, the congregation ultimately concluded that Brian had subsequently been "fucked" and dismissed him from further questioning.

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