take a magnifying glass to your conscience and make the world better

if you can get over _____ congrats you're better than most
i know i'm extremely hard to take
can't lie to save my life
kleptomaniac...who doesn't wanna steal from walgreens
so relieving when you hear somebody else say it
i take standup comedy very seriously
shoplifting so i could pretend i was a badass
couldn't forget my insecurity back in the day
booze helped me to turn that conscious off
yep we got bugs in the car
why i'd choose this instead of marriage n shit
stoned cold cynic since i was 6
the tv is everywhere now, no escape
of course it will come back up and i am sorry for that
"this guy thinks he needs that phone"
i'm telling you for the last time comedy special, 1998
i appreciate all types of comedy, even total crap
some things can be so bad that they're rendered good
trying to do what i do on cue *FAIL
it is that hard but tough shit, just do it
why i put up videos of myself doing standup that i hate
if you can't accept failure you will never accept success
still a typical woman enough for me to notice
the very few good women that exist i would die for
hi, lauren (always)