child abuse rant + totalitarianism

guy harrassing and threatening family that pissed me off to make this rant
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QrmmNroLd1g
jim jones death tapes
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofbGZDbbUsE

as to any question about why I was with my ex, it's because I thought I was younger than my dad and she was the same age as my mom when they met, I did my mistake after she broke up with me and she's the only woman to ever make me feel that way about them, and in fact the only woman I've ever been with and I hope to keep it that way, whatever happens I won't be with another woman for 2 years, or she comes back, or 1.5 years if I do euthanasia

god willing she'll be mine in the afterlife, or not, but by that point I'll know if my friends that told me her first and last name 15 years before we ever met and said she's my soulmate, were lying or telling the truth