Knock at the Cabin | 2023 Movies RANKED - Episode 5

Follow along as RANKED reviews a new movie release every week of 2023, slowly compiling the best films of the year into a sacred hierarchical list.

This show is now available on select podcast platforms. You can find them all here: https://anchor.fm/rankedpodcast

Previous Episode RANKED List:
1. Infinity Pool
2. M3GAN
3. missing
4. Plane

Ever wonder what it would be like to be tied to a chair for hours on end while strangers beg you to off yourself? I certainly do now.

M. Night you did it again, you managed to introduce an interesting premise, and then do absolutely nothing interesting with it. But I think this movie is a breakthrough for Mr. Shyamalan, a masterpiece of meta where he finally showcases his hatred for movie audiences by metaphorically tying us to our theater seats and forcing us to watch annoying people yell at each other for two hours.

That’s what’s so brilliant about this film, it literally forces you to suffer the same fate as the same-sex couple featured in the movie, where they’re tied to a chair so some people can beg them to kill each other while they also kill one another one by one. Unfortunately nobody in the theater offered to smash my skull in. Unlike the two dads in this movie, after 15 minutes, I was dying to be dead.

But at least I had Dave Bautista’s excellent performance to keep me company. Thanks Dave. F*ck you M. Night. Stop tricking me into giving you more chances. I swore you off after Lady in the Water & The Happening, but you keep tricking us with interesting trailers. Just stop it already.