Should You Detox from Toxic Relationships?

Relationships are very difficult but as Christians we should not cut people out of our lives merely because we don't feel like we are getting what we want out of the relationship.

0:00 Intro
1:31 Title Question
2:58 Define toxic relationships
11:38 This language leads to sin
20:38 Toxic relationship language is motivated by selfishness
28:03 What is the biblical response to difficult relationships?
45:44 Examine yourself for sin
58:10 Should you leave those who repeatedly sin against you?
1:13:48 Devote yourself to faithful people
1:23:50 God has given us ways to navigate difficult relationships
1:26:42 Outro

"You can only love others after you love yourself" is a common expression in today's culture. The idea that you must put yourself, your mental health, and well being before anyone else's if you could ever hope to care for others is popular in today's self help society. This "me first" mentality leads to relationships that are inherently selfish and self seeking. They force us to think that we are the most important person in any relationship. Then when things get difficult in a relationship, because you have been trained to think you are the most important person in a relationship and that your mental health comes before anyone else's, the self help culture tells you that not only is it a good idea to detox from that toxic relationship, but you MUST detox from them. Of course a toxic relationship is completely subjective and based on feelings alone. The minute you don't feel loved, supported, understood, disrespected, stressed, or the other person is ignoring your needs, then congratulations, you have found yourself in a toxic relationship.

The Bible teaches the exact opposite. Instead of loving others by first loving yourself, scripture teaches that if we are to truly love other people, we must view them as MORE significant than ourselves. Only then are we truly loving others. God teaches that true love does not insist on its' own way. So when we feel like we are in a relationship where we are disrespected, unloved, unsupported and so on, then the Bible doesn't say simply leave that relationship for the sake of your mental health. Instead God tells Christians to search their heart and ask themselves if there is any sin in their own life, then confront the other person and let them know how they feel. If there is sin in the other person's life, then they are to be confronted over that as well. God tells us this is the most loving thing we can do in relationships. Not only does it protect ourselves from sin and those around us, but it also teaches us to love others the way that God loved us. We love like God loved when we sacrifice ourselves, our self interests, desires, wants, and even needs for the sake of others.

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