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with black cats
Do they affect the “goth” lifestyle? (Note, this can be difficult to determine with black cats.)
If you answered yes to any of these, your cat could be on a path toward tragedy! It is important to make your cat understand how serious bullying is, and what dire consequences there can be if left unchecked. Explain to your cat that only losers get bullied, and that they should try harder to fit in and be popular in order to avoid the ridicule of their peers.
What should I do if I suspect my kitten is masturbating?
Let’s face facts: virtually all cats have masturbated at one point or another. Even worse, many young cats and kittens masturbate on a regular basis. And not just boy cats! Research shows that because of modern lax attitudes toward morality, females—both cat and human—have begun to masturbate as well. This can be an incredibly tricky topic, but if you play your cards right, you can teach your cat a bigger lesson about life as well as convincing them not to wantonly lick or rub their genitals. Use the topic of masturbation to let your cat know that God has a greater destiny for them. The goal of sex is procreation—to make more kittens for God to shine his light upon. Therefore, masturbation is a waste of your cat’s energy, and incompatible with God’s purrpose for them. Explain to your kitten that masturbation is a test that God gives each of us to see how smart we are. Some cats excel and redirect their sexual energies toward Jesus and being good, hardworking citizens, whereas others fail and want nothing more in life than to bat at their genitals as if they were a ball of yarn.
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