Yet Another Tory Leader - The Word Cloud Tarot Show - 20 Oct 2022
The #uk is collapsing, the #conservative #pm has resigned, the country is in #chaos and so the Tory MPs are trying to pick a new leader again.
Will they do any better this time?
What is happening?
Adam comes back off holiday a bit early with a prematurely-released new show-format to do a five minute #tarot reading on fuck me yet another new #tory #leadership #election.
### SignificatorA - 14 Of Cups, King
Our first candidate is the King of Cups,
a calm and communicative man, he's
portrayed as generous and knowledgeable
and _reasonable_.
He's the competent choice, intellectual and
trustworthy_, _thoughtful and mild
So I guess that's Sunak?
### SignificatorB - 10 Of Trumps, Fortune
Candidate B is _fortune_, a wild roll of the dice,
the crazy candidate that might be an
apocalyptic abyss_ or might be inevitable
destiny_, our _fate as a country.
A reincarnation of a prior _demise_, the
wheel of fortune rolling on.
That has to be Boris.
### SignificatorC - 12 Of Trumps, Hangedman
Candidate C is the Hanged Man. A unwilling and
uncomprehending capitulation to crisis
who was ceded power only after the _denouncement_.
He's the stooge put up so the guilty could escape
punishment.
So that'll be Jeremy Hunt then.
### IssuesA - 9 Of Pentacles, Gain
What is the trouble with Sunak?
His life has been comfortable and _blessed_, he is
a billionaire with a bountiful future whatever happens.
He will be content and cushioned and his earnings
durability is assured.
So ther is a guarantee of happiness and
laughter and perks but probably not for everyone.
Only for him. Only the capital.
### IssuesB - 21 Of Trumps, Universe
The trouble with Bojo is that he promises the universe
and achieves little. His promises the earth_, the _moon
the galaxy_, he promises _potential but in fact never delivers
anything but circular lies.
### IssuesC - 11 Of Cups, Page
The trouble with Hunt is that while he's
articulate and boyish and _calming_,
it's all _aesthetic_.
He is only in place because he is opportunistic and
a _team-worker_.
In the end is he just a page.
Not a king. Not a chancellor.
Not even really a health minister.
Just a calming and eager _idealist_,
too nuanced to be appealing.
### Result - 12 Of Cups, Knight
So the result?
We are looking for an artist who is also a _bard_, and
a calm_, _charming and comforting _dreamer_.
A rationalist and _realist_,
a selfless soothing thinker
who is tolerant and _whimsical_.
It doesn't really sound like any of them.
Just as equally wrong for them all.
Could it be Starmer?
He is an actual Knight,
Which is still a thing, in this day and age,
in a grown up country apparently.
Could the cards be suggesting that
the UK will soon have Starmer as it's leader?
If you think that'll be any better.
### Summary
Sunak is a rich man out of touch whose
life of riches has not equipped him to
understand real life.
Bojo is an outside shot, a roll of the dice,
trying to be leader of a conservative party.
He promises the universe, but he lies.
Hunt is only there by mistake, a sacrificial lamb,
he's just massively out of his depth like
a little page.
None of these people are what the UK needs,
they need an actual knight, maybe an actual Sir?
So the next Tory leader will be Starmer!
We'll have a Starmer flavoured blend of conservatism.
If you like these cards and want to do your own
reading, tough.
You can't buy 'em yet.
We've come out of break early for a leadership special.
There's a kickstarter starting in just ten days
and lasting all through November.
Coma back when there's a new prime minster and
support us then!
Subscribe to be reminded.
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