People Hate My Frugality (Another Reason for My Misanthropy)

Recently, my family and I went away on holidays with two other families. Both were Chinese. One family are quite wealthy and have one child, while the other is a single mum who has two young children. We went to a not-so-well-known theme park in Queensland. At Pot Plant World there was free entry, but this immediately set of alarm bells as I knew everything else would probably be expensive. When we walked in, there was a massive open-air cafeteria, which was really nice, but then I looked at the menu. There was the world famous Pot Dog which was a vegan hot dog with three types of relish and raw spring onion on top. It looked quite delicious, but also cost $27. Although I wasn’t planning to eat here, I wasn’t a complete scrooge. We did go on the Pot Pot Train and played a round of Pot Pot Golf. A family ticket for both activities was $85. That was fine. We finished up around 12:00 after seeing a lifetime’s worth of pot plants, but as we were exiting, the company had had the brilliant idea of placing an overpriced ice cream stand right next to the exit. So, of course, as we were exiting, all the kids were screaming, “Ice cream, ice cream!”, but I just told my kids that this ice cream is too expensive and that I would buy them some in the city when we go back in for lunch. Of course, the rich couple that we were with said, “Ah, come on, let’s buy some ice cream for the kids!”. I just replied fairly diplomatically, “Nah, I’ll wait till they’ve had lunch and then I’ll get them some in the city”. And this was when all hell let loose. The couple kept prodding me to buy some ice cream, and I kept refusing. And then the children started crying. Not just my children, but all of the children. The couple continued and kept admonishing me in public, and I looked like the right jerk. But I stuck to my guns and told my kids that I will get them ice cream, just not now. And then, the other lady joined in and started publicly berating me asking me why I was being so stingy and telling me that we’re only here once, so what does it matter. In the end, I was fed up with being publicly humiliated and just walked off. I thought to myself, “What does it matter if I don’t buy any ice cream?”.

Just to be clear, I admit that I am frugal, but I am certainly not stingy. I was not against the children eating ice cream, I was just not going to buy them the most expensive ice cream in the world. I didn’t even care if the other families bought ice cream, but I was not going to be pressured into buying it. I was simply going to wait until we got into the city and then buy ice cream for the children after lunch, which is exactly what I did in the end.

The same thing happened when I was living in Japan. All my American colleagues wanted to go out every night to have a beer, which usually turned into five or ten beers plus a meal costing them around $100-$200 every night. And every night, I pretty much refused to go out until they stopped asking me.

When I was in high school, I used to go out with my mates and they’d buy a coke or whatever from the pizza shop, and of course, I would go next door to the supermarket instead and buy the same coke for one-third the price. And as expected, they teased me. “You bloody cheapskate! Can’t even afford a coke!”, even though I had the exact same coke in my hands. I don’t know where those people are anymore. I don’t really care. But I presume they’re up to they’re eyeballs in debt. They were always very careless with their money, and it seemed to be the cool thing to do. I’ve found that in China as well. Generally speaking, Chinese do not like to be seen as tight with their money.

Anyway, that’s my frugal life. It should be noted that I only work part-time as I can’t bear full-time work, hence the need for my frugality. I simply don’t have the same salary as all these people. I’ve found that many people that I’ve had to deal with in my life just don’t like my frugality. I don’t know where it stems from, but they just do not like themselves being seen as cheap, and consequently, they almost tease anybody around them who does not live the same way they do. If you don’t want to go out and buy overpriced soy lattes, then they unfriend you. “Good riddance!”, I say.

As I said, I don’t see myself as stingy. I would define a stingy person as someone who tries to, for example, skip the bill, or doesn’t buy their round of drinks when it’s their shout, or whatever. However, I also can see that other people almost find it offensive when I’m frugal around them, and hence another reason for my misanthropy, and another reason why I don’t like spending my precious time with other people. There’s always a game that you have to play. You have to show your wealth, or at least, show that you’re not tight.

Are you frugal? Do you cop flak because of it?

MUSIC
Melancholia by Godmode