Triangle by David Nance Editing Session 7

This is Session 7 of editorial feedback for David Nance's novel Triangle. Breaking from continuing through the novel, I got back and take a closer look at sections from Session 6. I work through the text in more detail.
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David Nance described this session in a text as "The #7 breakdown was almost agony. You're like a personal trainer telling me to crank out 10 more reps when my arms are already shaky. Those two chapters were painful to write. So much going on. So many details to choose which to focus on. I tried. But you're probably right that there could be more..."