PROTECT your children, TELL them the truth about their Narc Mother!

Dear GOOD MEN, GOOD MENShow more

I really want to break down a lot of destructive societal norms, in how during a separation/divorce, the decent parent normally tries to protect the image of the narc abuser and isn't honest to the children about why the relationship has failed. Maybe you fail to tell your children about the affair/s, maybe you don't disclose the emotional/physical/psychological abuse that you suffered, or whatever else...

It IS difficult as men, because we are so used to sucking it up and just cracking on with things AND especially when the abuse is 'invisible' and leaving no trace - in such a way as covert/vulnerable narcissists specialise in. It IS difficult in this crazy and inverted society in which men are blamed for almost everything - to find the validity in our suffering and pain and to even come to see abuse we suffer at the hands of abuser-women as actual 'abuse.'

Such abuse suffered during divorces and separations; IS one of the leading causes of good Men self deleting. My ex nearly drove me to it on several occasions, even before my trauma memories of CSA had come back. I've lost friends and know of many others who couldn't bear the pain of losing their children and of having their reputations and careers and savings destroyed by malicious and wicked narcissistic women. (OBVIOUSLY not all women are like this, there are plenty of good women out there - some of whom also suffer similar... and there are plenty of dark and destructive women who seek to destroy men also)

You are in a WAR, a war for the spirit and wellbeing of yourself AND your children...

Be honest with your children as to why the relationship ended, yes gauge it and temper it relative to their age, don't offload your pain onto them, BUT be honest with them, discuss the distinctions of the abusive behaviour. GIVE them enough truth and knowledge so they are armed against the abuse that the Narc parent will increasingly inflict upon them in your absence.

We as (good) men need to STOP playing fair while our narc abusers steal away and turn our children against us as fathers.

Your decency WILL be used against you, IF you want to protect your children adopting a passive/fair stance will NOT be sufficient.

ALL the popular 'shoulds' and 'isms; 'that you don't tell the children why mummy and daddy broke up, or that you encourage a relationship with their (narc-abuser) mother, etc.... are all BS propagated by a broken society that seeks to weaken men and women and children, that gives our POWER away to abusers and manipulators... STOP being timid, STOP being overly accommodating in the face of EVIL.

For a parent to make false allegations against the other, for a parent to use the legal system to destroy/leave destitute the other, for a parent to smear and seek to isolate the other, for a parent to practice parental alienation against the other.... ALL of these kind of behaviours ARE EVIL and directly against the best interests of the children.

STOP taking it lying down.

Cut away from your children IF you need to for a while to ensure you don't take your own life due to the horrific nature of such abuse against men. Yes move on and heal and regather yourself and so on... but also NEVER give up on vengeance and the quest for justice against those who have unjustly wronged you.

In the days of reckoning that are fast approaching, these broken 'laws' and 'family courts' that are so complicit in the abuse and abandonment of children WILL be torn down and brought to justice. In such days you WILL be free to take your FULL vengeance upon the witches that have sought to destroy you and who stole your children from you.

In the meantime, consider my words and do what you can do, make sure you survive - do NOT self delete. Your death is more traumatic to your children than your absence, if you must step away - do so on your own terms and let the children know you'll return for them one day when you are able.

To do the right thing, no matter the cost
To seek truth, no matter how terrible

RESOURCES:
* https://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/real-reasons-ex-doesnt-see-kids/
* https://www.wealthysinglemommy.com/dads-explain-dont-see-kids/

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