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My Only Regret Marrying a Filipina is...
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What could a man regret by getting married to a Filipina? I will list some possibilities, then will come clean with a full disclosure of my only regret marrying a Filipina.
Loss of freedom-I know what it’s like to be single a very long time and I preferred to be married. So far, I don’t regret losing the freedom being alone because with that, sometimes it felt like being bound and not so free. Being married limits me in some ways but I also feel more freedom. Like they say, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side, but there are some things on the other side I couldn’t experience as a single person, such as a committed relationship for life.
Having a younger wife-I have made some videos about this, because although there are benefits to this for the older foreign man, there are things about being married to a younger woman he might be overlooking or underemphasizing. Things like what she is like when she has her period (some women have a very difficult one), her maturity, possible differences in priorities, and her plans and dreams for her future.
It is easy to get blinded by a Filipina’s beauty and see little else. If she happens to be immature and you are mature, your maturity will get tested in new and different ways. Marrying a Filipina who has been working and supporting her family gives you a better chance of marrying a more mature Filipina, at least in my opinion. She might like music and television shows that don’t appeal to you, and might spend a lot of time on social media and watching her favorite dramas from the Philippines. If you are older it is possible your idea of what to do with time after work is different than hers. These things need to be addressed before getting married.
That she might leave me-Do I regret “looking over my shoulder” that she might leave me? Do I regret now having to be concerned that some unscrupulous guy might try to intrude into my space? I feel safe with my wife. She has given me no reason to not trust her 100%. I can see how other guys eyeball her when we go shopping and I walk behind her and they think she’s alone. If someone made my wife uncomfortable, she would tell me and I would talk to this person, hopefully in the presence of his wife if he has one, and it won’t happen again.
That her family lives so far away-This means that we will need to make some trips to the Philippines now and then, if possible. That requires weeks of time and money. That just comes with the territory. I am getting better on the long flights and in a strange way I am beginning to...almost…like it. When my wife does go back to the Philippines in means a lot to her. Her excitement starts to build about a month before leaving and being there does her a lot of good.
What people think-This one bothers some men more than others. I would be naïve if I didn’t think that some men are jealous of me, in a good way. I would also be naïve if I didn’t think that some men are jealous in a bad way. They might say things behind my back, they might even make some things up. When Aiza got here in January of 2016, I took her to the main places I went such as doctors, dentist, financial advisor, my barber, introduced her to some coworkers, and my pastor. I think it would be best to do this and not try to “hide her” from others so as to not worry about what they think and say. You can’t hide her forever.
I don’t flaunt my wife in front of them, I simply introduce her to them as my wife. I act the same way around my wife in public as in private. At no time has anyone given me the impression they think I did something bad by finding my wife in the Philippines, and there probably is a stigma attached to a foreign man going to the Philippines to get married.
Watch the video for the only regret I have marrying a Filipina.
#GWYW #GoWhereYoureWanted #FilAmLIfe #FilAmMarriage
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