Why is he losing interest in me?

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QUESTION FROM A READER: Why is he losing interest in me?

“Carlos –

I’ve been dating this guy for 2 months, and it’s really weird. I’m wondering if I give off some kind of “stay away” vibe…

I met him at this art fair where I was working in a booth. He was kind of cute, but I wasn’t sure if he was my type.

Anyway, he comes over to talk with me at least 3 times each day. And each time he asks me out…

I didn’t accept until the last day, just in case he was some kind of player. He kind of grew on me, and I gave him my number.

So – I need to know – Why does a guy pursue a woman so intensely at first. And then when he finds out she’s actually interested, he’s not so sure if he is interested anymore?

And then his interest fades and he starts treating a woman like she’s an option instead of a priority…

When can you let a guy know you are interested? At what stage? Is dating just one big mind game?”

— Ellie R., Atlanta, GA

CARLOS ANSWERS: Here’s why he loses interest…

Well, Ellie, this is one of the most important questions that women ask me. So I’m going to spend some time really diving into it to explain.

Let’s start with what it’s usually NOT:

He’s probably NOT playing hard to get…

Guys are TERRIBLE at this game. I know it’s a concern for a lot of women that a guy might be using some kind of psychological games to manipulate women.

It just doesn’t happen.

Here’s why:

Most guys are not “pickup artists” or “players.” Nor do they want to be one.

Guys feel VERY very incompetent at the kind of romantic games that already come from the woman’s side of the relationship. Most guys just want a level playing field.

Guys don’t have the patience – or the understanding, or the self-control – to play hard to get.

We just don’t do that kind of posturing. If he’s a guy with a lot of options, he may be naturally “hard to get.” And that will probably trigger your feelings of scarcity. But most men don’t really “play games” on purpose.

So when you asked if dating was one big mind game, I have to tell you that it isn’t.

Most of the things we think of as games are not malicious or intentional at all. They are usually just by accident or circumstance.

Dating is more about how we play mind games WITH OURSELVES than anything the other person is doing intentionally.

We make up things in our heads as to why the other person is doing something weird. And what it turns out to be is just good ol’ crazy emotional behavior.

Even men do it.

So now you might be asking yourself –

What Should You DO If He Loses Interest?

There are a few things you can do if a man has lost interest in you:

Do nothing…

Try to win him back…

Date other guys…

Give up dating for a while & focus on you…

Know that he’s not really reacting to YOU…

These are some of the most popular alternatives. But there is one that you may not have considered…

I’ll come back around to explain it at the end…

So now we have to tap into the reasons why men lose interest in women.

REASON 1 He Lost Interest: He was never all that interested…

Sometimes guys broadcast interest even when they didn’t have any to begin with. In the moment, he was flirty, funny, and intrigued. Maybe even a little liquored up.

Or – if you’ve been dating him for a short time, you come to realize that he was actually using you as a BTN.

That stands for “Better Than Nothing.”

It’s not that he’s intentionally trying to mislead you, or even lead you on. He probably thought in that moment: “Hmm… there’s potential here. Let’s see what happens.”

But then he realizes he either wasn’t as attracted to you as he thought, or another option comes along.

I hate to say it, but I’ve been the victim of this many times. Yeah, so both men and women feel this one.

If you’ve been in a relationship for a while with someone who loses interest, he might have been staying in the relationship even though he wasn’t that into it. He might have been a guy who was afraid of being alone.

If you suspect he might have lost interest because of this, it’s best to

For more - watch the video!

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Carlos Cavallo
Dating Advice Guru
http://www.datingadviceguru.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carlosdatingguru
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Why is he losing interest in me?
https://youtu.be/fxDnIPfYIZg