4 years ago

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Playing Hard To Get – 7 Secrets You Never Learned…
BY CARLOS CAVALLO

Let’s start right off by saying that there is a big difference between playing hard to get and being hard to get.

Most women play at it but don’t understand how to really BE the prize. Because that’s what it’s really all about: You have to make yourself the prize to your man for him to chase you, pursue you, and desire you.

And of course you don’t want to play games with him.

But prepare to be surprised. “Hard to get” does NOT mean you’re being manipulative!

We’re going to take a close look at the strategy of playing hard to get. I will show you secrets that you never learned, and why playing hard to get is the most important thing you can do to make an honest and committed relationship work.

First of all let’s talk about PLAYING hard to get versus BEING hard to get…

When you play hard to get, you’re playing games with a guy. Yes you are playing head games and that’s why you feel guilty and weird when you do it.

Being hard to get is what most women are playing at. Every woman wants to be hard for him to win.

The problem is when you make yourself too darn easy! And let’s face it, most women make it too darn easy.

I’m going to tell you what the reason is for that in a bit…

Playing hard to get is faking it and living from a scarcity mindset…
What is a scarcity mindset?

Scarcity is the belief that everything in your life is hard to get already. All the stuff you really want is scarce.

It’s like the constant feeling of starvation. You’re always hungry because you can never be satisfied. You never get what you want.

And at the very least you definitely don’t believe you can get what you want. It somehow feels unattainable, just outside of your grasp.

When you play hard to get, it feels weird because most women are faking the attitude. They don’t really believe they have the value to BE hard to get.

She won’t allow herself to be truly scarce for fear of losing him…!

BEING hard to get, on the other hand, is being authentic.
What is authentic?

It’s when you’re acting from you. From your essential personality instead of from manipulative games.

So when you are actually hard to reach on the phone, hard to schedule for a date, hard to find time to get together with, you are genuinely authentically hard to get.

Why do we play “hard to get?”

Typically people play hard to get for one of two reasons:

Increase attraction – make someone want us more…
To test the other person – see how interested they really are…
And these strategies are typically done because the other person was viewed as a prize – a real catch.

In most studies, it’s shown that women use hard to get strategies much more often than men. Frankly, most guys don’t go “scarce” intentionally. I’ll tell you why shortly…

The goal of playing hard to get is this: Making him value YOU as a rare precious gift in his life.

Most women are doing the exact opposite. I’ll explain how in a moment…

What are some of the things people do to play “hard to get?”

Here’s a short list of some of the strategies that people use to manipulate their availability:

Acting confidently – trying to appear like a valuable commodity…
Flirting but then stopping; giving attention but then disappearing – i.e., running hot and cold…
Limiting self-disclosure – holding back information to stay a mystery…
Talking to other people, flirting, and even dating other people…
Making accidental physical contact, but holding back physical affection…
Withholding sex…
Teasing, playing games…
Offering challenge – Making others work to get them and chase them…
Acting busy, staying busy, and lowering the other person’s priority…
Acting as if not attracted, sometimes disinterested…
Taking a long time to respond to calls and texts, or not responding at all…
To sum it up, the general strategies of “hard to get” are:

Having limited availability…
Sounding busy…
Being hard to reach…
Seeking attention but then ignoring it…
Showing initial interest, and then switching to disinterest…
Now all of these tactics do work. If they’re done naturally – meaning that they happened because the circumstances of your life make them true – then it’s considered okay.

But if these things are done on purpose, they are seen as being manipulative and game playing.

And it’s unlikely ...

For the rest - Watch the video!

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Carlos Cavallo
Dating Advice Guru
http://www.datingadviceguru.com
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carlosdatingguru
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