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Physician, Heal Thyself: Luke. I Am. Your Father.
Greetings, Earthlings!
The hellhound who, of court record, has feared me the most, far more than even a dreaded coronavirus, had fortunately, by grace, provided me prior warning of his attack, in a CBS News exclusive interview with Major Garrett, and of his dark plans to use his infection and miraculous healing, at the age of 84, to promote the effectiveness of of COVID-19 countermeasures products, approved on the basis of a mere preprint of an efficacy test. Truly my word is my sword, even if not from my mother's womb untimely ripped.
Under the authority and power vested in me by the FOIA, as an expert therein, I am fully aware more than most that under Exemption 6 I could not obtain the exact identification of the zoonotic source that had infected the good doctor; however, as Assistant WHO Director had said, after authoring a 40-page report he lamented that nobody even read, getting the virus is a function of being exposed to someone who has the virus, the length of exposure and the viral load, of viable variety, they are shedding.
So, we know CDC had heralded trace contacts as the key to disrupting the spread during the Ebola outbreak in West Africa, and had described it as the most efficient and effective method of case identification; so, we must assume the President's top medical adviser has a diligently prepared list of trace contacts from whom you have had ample time to determine who the good doctor may have infected as well as a narrowed list of potential persons who may have infected him.
So, we are requesting any and all documents related to the secondary attack of Dr. Fauci, post infection, the estimated viral load that infected him, or infectious dose, and any and all documents pertaining to the validated ophidian codon usage bias of this novel coronavirus and why the scientific community has dismissed the knowledge that coronaviruses only infect mammalian and avian species.
As a congressional candidate, according to FEC, I am eligible for a fee waiver, in the public interest.
Thanks for your cooperation, and I expect this too shall be resolved in the courts, for our biological agent that the government can neither confirm nor deny it owns.
Major Mike Webb
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